My mum has a big birthday coming up. We wanted to arrange a party, which she suggested as fun, but when we started suggesting were to have it, who to invite, she said no to all of it.
For instance i asked if i could invite her brothers and their partners/wives and she said, no because she didnt like on of the wives. She didnt want her party ruined by having to be polite to 'that woman'.
A suggestion to have the party at her house was 'too much work and not much of a treat for me' and my suggestion to have party in my home/garden was met with 'you live too far away and my friends wont come' BTW my home is about 20/30 mins by car away from hers.
We made a suggestion of hiring local hall, but again, negative comments made about it.
Recently she has been telling me about all the gifts she has had over the years that were crap esp those from my dad.
i suggested in the end that i take her out for a cream tea as she loves cakes, but she said she makes her own perfectly good scones and cream at home and doesnt need to go out for that.
I have a list in my head of things she hates,
clothes, very fussy about clothes, not see through, not too low a neckline, not wool as it makes her itch, and not too long /short a top length, and not yellow as it makes her look sallow.
no ri rings, watches or necklaces as she has a nickal allergy and only wears a necklace that has a very long chain as she hates tight things around her neck, that can hang outside her clothes.
no ornaments,
Before she mentioned the ornament thing, I already ordered something, a real rose dipped in gold. It looked good on amazon but in reality looks a bit shit.
Have also brought a hamper of tea and biscuits as she meets friends and her brothers at her house once a week.
I think ehe will not be impressed about that either.
so am at a loss.
Should I accept I cant make her happy and concentrate on providing her with something to complain about?