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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

If you are vegetarian or vegan - what do you eat ?

251 replies

Pisssssedofff · 25/07/2016 16:35

DD 1 has gone veggie and gone up a dress size, basically because she's having pasta at every meal, cereal for breakfast and nothing for lunch, far too much fruit juice and scoffing 6 apples a day too.
She won't eat eggs - any suggestions it's driving me insane, I don't think she really likes vegetables if we are honest.

OP posts:
Motherfuckers · 27/07/2016 03:48

First you say you all eat a lot of ready meals, then you state you don't want her eating processed food. Your diet sounds awful, no wonder she has such a limited palate.

milpool · 27/07/2016 04:18

OP, for all you go on about processed food, it seems you've no problem with processed meat.

Make your mind up...

Pisssssedofff · 27/07/2016 09:27

Interesting - we don't eat processed meat actually at all, no bacon, sausages, burgers etc. Hence feeding DD a frozen veggie sausage doesn't seem quite right whilst we are tucking into ribeye steak.
There are ready meals and ready meals aren't there. The non veggies and I will eat m&s carrot and potato mash with our chicken breast or steak for example. Or prepared carrots, broccoli and cauliflower for example. I'm not s great cook, I don't enjoy it and I don't have much spare time. If she wants to go on to be a vegetarian foodie that's up to her on her time and budget, in my house with my salary it's my way. Thanks again for the recipes ☺️

OP posts:
NobodyInParticular · 27/07/2016 11:58

Well, this was a pointless thread then!....... I need advice to change please, no, wait, actually piss off with your advice, I'm determined not to change or listen to any of you, actually I just came on here to try to get sympathy over how bloody awkward my daughter makes my life......

OP I find your attitude towards your DD callous.

Pisssssedofff · 27/07/2016 12:28

Yeah that's exactly it. Have you actually read a word I've written at all ? Bore off Nobody

OP posts:
Cordychase · 27/07/2016 13:29

Veg every day by Hugh Fearnley Whittingstall is a brilliant book. I am not vegetarian but there are loads of easy and tasty vegetarian meals in there which my 7 year old will eat.

PinkFondantFancy · 27/07/2016 13:30

Deliciously Ella didn't really like veg when she first changed her diet but she had a handful of meals on rotation and gradually went from there. Her books might be a good starting point.

Phatandphunny · 27/07/2016 13:49

Christ almighty you've got to have thick skin to ask you lot for advice! I'd love to live on the pedestals you're all standing on but I feel the occasional tall tale helps when dealing with kids! Oh how perfect your life must be that you enjoy never lied to your children!
So she gave her spag bol with meat...big deal. She was eating meat a few weeks ago and it's not like she's allergic to meat protein. OP has not poisoned her child, people. Chill the feck out!

OP my best suggestion would be to try pintrest for some ideas as well as some of the more reasonable mumsnetters suggestions and I'm sure you'll be able to concoct a fairly decent weekly menu that will keep her healthy. I used to be vegetarian but never delved into the vegan side of things so ate a lot of eggs back then lol

PurpleDaisies · 27/07/2016 13:52

So she gave her spag bol with meat...big deal. She was eating meat a few weeks ago and it's not like she's allergic to meat protein. OP has not poisoned her child, people. Chill the feck out!

The op's daughter has made a moral decision that she doesn't want to eat meat any more. She is sixteen. She has the right to decide what she puts into her own body. It's pretty low to lie about whether food is vegetarian or not.

NobodyInParticular · 27/07/2016 13:54

OP, Ive read every one of your posts. Here are some of the comments FROM OTHER POSTERS which you may find it useful to mull over:

even if OP cant be arsed to read the posts, I like these ideas.
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You don't seem to be taking any advice that's offered to you on board and I'm struggling to understand why you bothered posting this thread at all. If you're so uninterested, lack the lime and the inclination then don't waste everyone's time by asking for advice that you're going to ignore.
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Gosh OP you don't seem to want what you asked for in your OP at all! All genuine mealtime suggestions are being shot down or ignored. You just seem 100% against your daughter making the decision to be veggie. It doesn't seem to matter what anyone here says, you aren't able to respect her choice or take it seriously............But what you really seem to want is actually just a moan about your daughter, so do crack on with that.........But it might be better to accept that rather than just getting angry with us all.
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So you don't have the time or the inclination to change what your family eats but you've started a thread about what vegetarians and vegans eat. Okay..
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If your dd is as stubborn as you are, you're not going to be able to convince her not to be vegetarian.
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As the thread has progressed you've grown more wilfully ignorant, disrespectful and unsupportive towards your daughter. Your attitude towards your daughters weight gain is pretty dreadful and from the sounds of it I think you're being slightly hypocritical by calling her lazy
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You tricked your own vegetarian daughter into eating meat? You have no shame. That's a fucking horrible thing to do. I would have been livid and would question your honesty forevermore if I was her. Surprised so many vegetarian posters have gone on to give you their thoughts. I can't get past the deceit.
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I don't think you are giving her a lot of respect.......... It's really unfair to give her meat in secret and tell her it's quorn (you could have just made it with quorn for real and skipped all the deception)!
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Am I missing something? Your DD went veggie and put on a dress size but your so worried about her not eating your putting meat into her food and lying to her that it is quorn or soya? That is disgusting.
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I can't believe you fed her meat and lied.
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You made it with meat and told her it was veggie? Seriously?
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Right, so you fed her meat. What a shit thing to do
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I don't get what is so hard about it, I also don't get what possessed you to put meat in a vegetarian's dinner - I'd go fucking ballistic if someone did that to me.
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........the meat options aren't perfectly acceptable, because they contain meat.
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Please don't feed her meat again. If you don't want to/can't provide her with a meal that fits her requirements then whether or not she's being reasonable you need to be honest with her.
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.......if she's gone veggie for ethical reasons then I'm sure it's the same story for her. Do you undermine her like this all the time?
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OP, my mother was like you. When I turned veggie she first insisted on serving me meat at the dinner table, tricked me into eating food that made me very ill and refused to make any allowances for my diet in the weekly shop. As a result I have moderate to severe issues with food.......
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If you want her to eat a more varied diet, cook a more varied range of vegetarian foods for her. If you don't want to cook for her, accept that she might have a crap diet for a while while she learns to feed herself. But you can't make her eat meat if she doesn't want to. Don't lie to her about whether the meal you're serving is vegetarian, that is disrespectful whichever way you swing it.
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be careful, you may have lied to her with the best of intentions, but it's an age where lasting damage can be done to the mum daughter relationship.......... Also, be very careful about refusing to buy clothes because she has put on weight, she is not too old for an eating disorder. Again, I don't know your daughter, but 16 year olds I have known, weight can be a very sensitive subject.
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Please don't give her body-image issues on top of your dishonesty about what you're feeding her!
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You're really going to happily watch her wear clothes that are too tight for several months? Well fucking done you.
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Please don't punish her weight gain by not getting her clothes that fit :-( weight gain IMO is often caused by low self esteem and I have never managed to lose weight by trying to fit into tight clothes.
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OP, for all you go on about processed food, it seems you've no problem with processed meat.Make your mind up...
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Your diet sounds awful, no wonder she has such a limited palate.
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That has already been suggested yeddar. The op does not have the time or the inclination.....
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You mention laziness, OP, but your attitude to the Quorn is slightly lazy...
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Nothing wrong with either but not on a 5 meal rotation. Everyone's nutrition will eventually suffer of you allow this to continue.
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Fuck living off 5 meals....
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I think the issue here, OP, is that by your own admission your family eats quite a limited diet. You just have a few limited meals on rotation - pizza, roast dinner, spat Bol etc. So naturally your daughter is not going to suddenly be able to plan or cook a wide variety of meals.
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Please take the above comments on board OP!

Thecatgotmytongue · 27/07/2016 13:59

I have similar problems. Dd is 15 and veggie, but won't cook for herself. I have bought her a veggie cookbook but she's not interested.

She mainly eats refried beans in wraps, pasta with tomato sauce and cheese, nuts, cheese and tomato pizza, chips and quorn chicken bites. I try to make sure she has plenty of salad and has milk and cheese and nuts and hope that'll be ok.

Pisssssedofff · 27/07/2016 14:06

Ask for a recipe and basically get told you're a shit mother, it's hilarious it really is ... I am laughing because mountain out of a molehill is an understatement. Luckily I'm a confident parent you honestly do need to consider some people could be really hurt by these assignations

OP posts:
Soakingupsomesunshine · 27/07/2016 14:14

To be honest OP I think you should call it a day on this thread. With 240 messages you've received all the advice you need. I think by hanging around you are just encouraging people to post more of the same, including some of the less pleasant stuff. I wish you and your daughter the very best of luck in working together to find a solution that works well for both of you.

NobodyInParticular · 27/07/2016 14:14
Biscuit
NobodyInParticular · 27/07/2016 14:15
Shock
NobodyInParticular · 27/07/2016 14:15
Confused
NobodyInParticular · 27/07/2016 14:16

^ that was at the OP, not you soaking.

LieInsAreExtinct · 27/07/2016 14:37

Ribeye steak and chicken breast with m and s mash...you clearly have a 'healthy' budget for food!
My 11 yr old DS has recently become vegan. Yes it's a bit inconvenient, but I support this and would much rather have that than that he demanded meat all the time (we only have it occasionally) or clamoured for McDonalds, KFC etc.

Charliechuck94 · 27/07/2016 14:57

Wow I don't think you are taking her very seriously tbh. My sister and myself just recently became vegetarian and the transition has been quite challenging. Try whole wheat or rice pasta for large meals. Quorn mince meet it ok for vegans as well as vegetarians. However it doesn't have a great texture to it. I would recommend a soya protein mince instead. It can be found in all supermarkets. You need to make sure she is getting vitamin D so her body can absorb plant based iron as well, so she doesn't become anemic.

Charliechuck94 · 27/07/2016 15:05

Oh and my sister is 8 years younger than me, making her only 15. It can be done at your daughters age. She sounds like a very fussy eater, so I would probably just cook her something healthy and if she won't eat, she doesn't eat anything unless she cooks it herself. Tough love and all that...

mathsmum314 · 27/07/2016 15:08

Isn't it weird to point out that your "prepared carrots" are from Marks & Spencer? So why not just buy fresh prepared veggie meals from M & S while you are there?

MidnightVelvettheSixth · 27/07/2016 15:28

Oh give the OP a break, its not as though the DD has actually done any research about it or said that she will help with meal planning. She's grandly announced that she's veggie yet won't eat eggs or dairy & expects the OP to cater to her without a backwards glance. Then she gets fat eating in an unhealthy unsustainable way but all that matters is that the OP made a meal with some meat in. The OP didn't even say that she lied to her daughter about it, yet you have all jumped on her for feeding her DD meat. She's fucking 16, did she not ask whether it had meat in it?! Go on some MN threads & at 16 some posters had children & their own accomodation, yet you all expect the clearly knackered OP to faff around with extra meals for the entitled daughter who has no intention of lifting a finger to accomodate her own lifestyle choices.

dorisdog · 27/07/2016 16:06

Seriously, if you said she was going vegan, I could see how that would make things a bit more tricky, but these days it's just so easy to be vegetarian. And there's plenty of healthy-ish, quick cook 'junk' food that isn't very expensive.
If you're worried about her eating properly, just plonk stuff on the table - she'll eat of she's hungry - she is 16.
Veggie sausages/burgers, in a bun with salad
Vegetable or bean pasties
Raw carrots, peppers, celery and humous
Coleslaw is a great way to hide vegetables
All fruit is vegetarian!
Quiche, or any other kind of vegetable 'tart'
Vegetarian sausage rolls
Cauliflower cheese
Spaghetti bolognese with quorn/lentils
Cheese on toast
Chips and peas
Beans on wholemeal toast is pretty healthy
All kinds of curries and chilli and rice
Couscous
Wraps
If i had time, I could probably go on forever....

dorisdog · 27/07/2016 16:12

Although I do realise mealtimes can be tricky if you're busy. I don't think it would be unfair to expect a 16 yr old to help you prepare food, though. What about others adults in the family? What's her dad doing to help? (Sorry if you already explained that, but I didn't see it)

I became vegetarian when I was a child - I'm so grateful to my parents for supporting me in that decision. My dad became vegetarian with me, which was lovely. And they didn't have a lot of money (or time!). We just found cheap ways to to eat. (I ate a LOT of beans on toast!).

magratvonlipwig · 27/07/2016 20:36

My son had a vegan girlfriend for a year, they were here at teatime loads and i had no trouble feeding her. She called me the vegan frendly carnivore!
Wed have lots of roast potatoes and roast veg, with our meat cooked separately. veg gravy granues were a godsend.
When cooking chicken curry id do the veggie and spices sauce in one pan and the chicken in another.... And pour it over the chicken on the rice.
same with stir fry.
I could make a lovely mushroomy bolognaise style sauce, put hers out, then combine with my minced beef and onions for everyone else
And tesco do lots of lovely quorn burgers etc or nut cutlets., which shed have when we had burgers or fish fingers.
It doesnt have to be difficult.
i do agree with other posters its time she started some basic cookery skills.