Ain't in being upset at partners family visiting?

[Kmoggy]

I have 11 month twins and 5 weeks away from having no 3. I can't decide whether Its hormones and crankiness causing me to feel this way or if I have a right to be upset!
My twins will be 1 in Aug, 5 days before my due date and we are having a party for them. His family are from down south (we are in Scotland) and he has invited his elderly grandparents up for it not for 1 night but for 4 nights 5 days! I'm furious as to be honest the last thing I want is having to look after 2 house guests for that amount of time, plan and organise a party for 40. So I tried to say to my partner that he better take the fri off work and entertain them so I don't need to but he can't get it off.. So now the fri before my boys birthday I need to have his grandparents sitting about in my house. My partner says they can help but how can they? His grandad can barely walk to end of street and bk and his gran is partially blind! Plus I can't get them in my car with the kids too!
So his mum is up tonight and I mentioned it to her that I'm a bit stressed about it as I don't want to leave them for 5 days sitting in house in hope she might have a word with them! She's only gone and openly suggested to his sister that she should come up on the fri to help, this would mean her sleep in on my sofa! 😁😁 I'm about to have a melt down... His sister is a soiled brat who doesn't lift a finger when here ever to help and plays dumb when her mum asks her to do anything so how on earth she can help me prepare food and bake a cake is beyond me.. Plus I don't need help, what I need is no one in my house for more than 1 night 5 days before I have a baby!!
Today I have had to talk to his mum and sis all day coz he doesn't and then he just said at 9 pm I'm going to bed! I was like emmmm no your not in going for a shower to wash my hair, then text him from upstairs to say how can he expect me to entertain his family all the time when he makes no effort himself? I'm 8 months pregnant and could do with a bit of peace and quiet but I'm not rude and wouldn't leave my guests sitting in their own all night!

Ok update; told DH that it's too much and that they had no right to go ahead and organise without confirming with me first. He isn't happy and as expected turned it around on me for going up to my mum today (3 hrs away: 5 weeks away from due date so no hassle really) he says he wants to spend time with them and I have told him that's fine so do I but not at 39 weeks pregnant, offered a solution as he is off for 4 weeks when baby comes that they are welcome then. When he is around to Chaufer them about! Also compromised and said can come late Friday night when he is home or sat and stay until mon am!
Spoke to mil who also states is unaware I was unaware and she only found out a few days ago when they booked the tickets( which she says she knew nothing of until done) so it's been between my DH and his cousin that have organised it all. So mil is going to unorganise it and suggest they come up with her and go bk with her in car and change train to later on when baby is here so they can see lil one.

Should add that I have told mil and DH to make it clear that if baby is here then they will need to book into hotel as can't stay here.

There are a lot of valid suggestions on here but I'm guessing you're going to do anything for an easy life - including having GP's and sister to stay, doing it all yourself whilst getting no help from DH.

Why can't your DH get the Friday off work, if he's got over a months warning of the date? What do you feel comfortable asking MIL to do? (Coming up early, taking the GP's out, bringing a cake)

Well done Kmoggy

Ah brilliant! Ignore my last post.

Re: your mum, that's a totally different situation

Your dh is the problem here really!

Well done! And also well done your MIL who sounds lovely!

Well done you and your mil!
Your DH still
Sounds like a twat.

Omg! I'd kill your 'D'H!!

He just doesn't give a shit how hard looking after twin babies is and being heavily pregnant without having elderly guests and a birthday party to organise does he?!!

I hope he'll be getting their bed ready/changing sheets, picking them up from the train station, buying the food in, cooking evening meals, etc, etc seeing as he's so keen to have them stay?

Also tell your DH he's either being thick or obtuse if he doesn't see the difference between elderly guests staying who'll need looking after and your mother staying who'll be actually helping!

I suspect he doesn't see the difference as either way he doesn't have to lift a finger...

Also a massive difference between visiting your own mum and not someone else's relatives! He seems to avoid his and make them op's problem.

Good on you for sorting it.

Yep going to change tickets till beg of Sep and come for 5 days when DH is off and twins are bk at childminder a few hrs a week. Mum dad and sis all going to come sat and drive gp up, stay in B&B and go bk after party xxx well that's the proposal! DH still sulking a bit but he'll get over it.. Esp when can spend quality time with them and do day trips when they come up to see baba.

He'll come round. It's a much better plan for everyone - I imagine the grandparents would love to meet a new baby. A win-win.

It sounds very OTT for a first birthday! Plus if you're having a big party for all your local friends and family your husband would naturally expect his family to be invited, surely it would cause a massive family upset if you just expected your side to come? It just seems a really silly thing to have organised when you're due to give birth!! It was always going to have meant visitors from down south and the likelihood of people wanting to stay..

Somehow missed your updates. Glad you've sorted something.