Angry with nursery for putting babies in with older kids at the end of the day

[Nuni]

Because some of the staff go home early, they don't have enough staff to keep the baby room open the last couple of hours before nursery closes.

I deliberately chose a nursery with a room for Under 2s, I'm paying the same price for the hours she's mixed in with older kids. She's still so small and vulnerable, I don't like her being in with 4-5 year olds

Why didn't they tell me this before?

Or do all nurseries do this?

Keyworker is fantastic but I feel really let down by the way the nursery is run... surely if they advertise a baby room it should stay open until closing time? I wanted a safe, baby-friendly area, where she feels secure, not being lumped in with older kids at the end of the day, in a room set up for a different age group, just so they can avoid paying more staff

They do this in DS's nursery, he absolutely loves going in with the bigger kids. He is well looked after and it is a change of scenery after being stuck in the same room all day.

I think YABU, they aren't letting 5yr olds trample all over babies

Yes the op is being unreasonable IMO. But this isn't a thread albout the rights and wrongs of nurseries so your ott statement isn't needed. Btw they're not strangers - nursery nurses develop good bonds with the children. unless you're happy to have no female doctors/teachers/lawyers/business people then don't go on. And why is your comment focused on mums, don't dads count? Why are you just focusing on mums?

My DD has been in a 'vertical' streamed nursery since 6mo, made up of kids 0-4yo. This is very normal! The staff give extra attention to the babies, holding them nearly all the time. I'm not sure what you're worried about.

My DC's nursery do this towards the end of the day. I don't have an issue with it.

Nutella, your post made me laugh! I work 3days a week and 'parent' DD the other 4days. I could have been a SAHM but I like working and it allows us to save for her future. I also feel she benefits from socialising with other kids, all the extra stimulation of nursery, the activities they do. She loves nursery and her keyworker is outstanding. It gives her a richer experience than I can provide by myself.

FWIW they do share the garden and patio with older children but I don't mind this, as babies are in a group with their keyworkers, under close supervision. It's at end of day it bothers me, when staff are busy with paperwork and taking children out to handover to parents. When I mentioned my concerns to the manager she implied I should be grateful they stay open late... but I deliberately chose a nursery that fitted with our working hours!

I think part of it is they want to clean the rooms, so all children must be moved out of a room (staff are often vacuuming when I arrive). I feel this is unprofessional, if a nursery stays open until 6:30pm surely they should arrange cleaning for when the children have left? It's not the fault of the nursery nurses but the way it's managed. They could employ more staff to cover the last shift rather than manage with a skeleton staff. The prices are at the top end for this area but I almost feel they view it as a burden when parents use the longer hours. IMO cleaning and going home should take second priority to the children's comfort. Luckily my DD is quite confident, but being shifted to a different room, with older children being boisterous and unfamiliar staff, could be distressing for a baby.

Yes I do want more children. But it's different with your own, you supervise them and can make sure non-baby-safe toys are out of reach.

you supervise them and can make sure non-baby-safe toys are out of reach.

If you dont think the nursery do this as standard, then I think you have got bigger issues to worry about tbh.

Nutella the 19th century called, they want you back immediately.

I am still not getting your argument, and you seem to be ignoring what everyone has said so I am not sure why you bothered posting when you are so sure you are not being unreasonable!

I am always surprised by the number of parents who fail to do their research about the setting they are trusting to look after their child, then moan when the place/person does something fairly standard that the parent disapproves of.

All settings I've been to arrange mixed age times even if they don't need to, purely because it's so beneficial for the children. Knowing how to interact with older and younger children is an important skill they will need in life.

YABU, you pay more for babies at nursery because of the higher staffing ratios, not to keep them away for older children.

It totally makes sense for children to be grouped together at the end of the day and for the cleaning to start before everyone has left. It saves everyone money. It was standard in the nurseries my DC attended.

This happened at my son's nursery and spending time with older children helped his development. Equally then being the older child with the younger I believe helped develop his gentle caring side. Also as a pp pointed out one day someone will look at your child as "boisterous", possible drag their child away from yours. It's easy to look at other children as a danger to your own but they very rarely are.

It sounds as though you have concerns with the suitability of the toys and the staff watching the children play over tidying up rather than the mix of ages. The EY statutory framework is very clear on ratios and also safeguarding children is paramount. No good setting would risk ratios or putting out toys that pose a danger to younger children as they would compromise their future. If you feel they are doing this then they are not a good enough setting for your child.

When you have another baby and your DC1 is a big boisterous 3 yo, will you keep them in separate rooms at all times OP?

Lots and lots of people have told you about all the benefits that this system works to your DC's benefit but you are not convinced?

I'd be really annoyed at this too. My nursery doesn't do this. (At least not before 6pm which is standard pick up time there). Don't know what they do after that

Most nurseries employ staff in 8 hour shifts, so the staff are not leaving early, they probably started work at 8am. It's really difficult to recruit staff for odd shifts, such as providing cover at the start or end of the day, as this is when many people want to be with their own families. They won't have spare capacity, or if they do, they are probably losing money on those hours.

It is standard practice to tidy up and complete paperwork within the working day. Employing staff beyond 6pm to do this would not only increase your fees considerably, but would also be unreasonable for the staff concerned. You need a nursery place because of the hours you work - some nursery staff will also need childcare themselves and I'm sure you know how difficult it is to find extended hours childcare. Many of them will be paid on or around the national minimum wage, so they are unlikely to receive much financial benefit from extending their working day.

Our nursery do this too, DS is now 2.5 but attended from 4 months so I can see both sides. He actually loved going into the 'big room' and it really helped him when he transitioned up at 2. As long as they have the correct staff ratios then nursery aren't doing anything wrong.

On the 4 days that your dc is home with you, do you never do anything else other than give her sole, undivided attention ?
Do you think she suffers in some way when you do a bit of tidying around or put some dinner on ?

No ? Thought not.

So why do you think she is suffering in some way if the staff speak to another parent or sit and write up a note for a minute or two at Nursery ? You do realise they need to do all those things throughout the day, as well - just as you do when you are caring for her.

I'm sure if you wanted to pay 2 staff, on overtime after the end of their shift, to solely keep your dc in the baby room and not be looked after in another room for the last 1/2 hour, you could put the proposal to the Nursery Manager - but be prepared to get your wallet out to facilitate this.

If you want the nursery to sort out the staffing and have extra people, people staying later to clean then I would be prepared for your fees to double. They are a business, they need to make money to pay the staff. It can't be made to suit your convenience and pfb attitudes.

A lot of people have said this is how it is with a childminder: in fact, it isn't.
A childminder has a much smaller group that is mixed at all times so the children spend all day learning how to interact and how to be careful around babies. A childminder will usually have the whole premises adapted for baby use, not just one room.

Having said that, I know of only one incident when a toddler attacked and seriously injured a baby in a nursery. It was down to poor supervision - the staff didn't know they were together - and it happened some years ago.
So long as supervision and facilities are suitable, there should not be a problem.

So why do you think she is suffering in some way if the staff speak to another parent or sit and write up a note for a minute or two at Nursery

I didn't say she is suffering or lacks attention. It just makes me anxious that she might be knocked over or trampled by older bigger kids. It seems common sense for older kids not to jump and run near a small non-walking baby. What if they fell on her or squashed her? She can't get out of the way or push back like an older child. If it's a structured mixed-age session during the day, yes I do see the benefits and think that's good... but at end of day the staff are busy and preoccupied. I know they need to do paperwork and take kids out to the entrance hall to their parents. But that means less focus on supervising and making sure older ones are gentle with the babies.

And yes of course she plays independently at home, but if she was playing with an older child (eg friends 4-year-old) I would be watching like a hawk in case he got too rough or started being mean. Kids aren't always nice to younger ones. My friends often complain about their older child pushing the younger one around or pinching/being nasty when their back is turned.

I thought this was going to say what happened in the nursery that my son was briefly at- they turned off lights, hoovered around him and would have him sat in a corridor, as I was the last to pick him up ( it was mainly used by students who collected at 4. I collected at 5 and was meant to be open till 6!) It happened daily- I would have been happier with him in another room. He only stayed there a few months! Talk to them, see what they say and then move on from there?

watch that the bigger children don't eat her.

This is pretty standard in most nurseries in the morning as parents drop off and generally from about 5 as children are collected and staff leave. Personally I think it's a great thing to do as the younger children get a good variety of not only toys but learning experiences. When I worked in a nursery the children also mixed at snack/lunch and tea time (which is a rarity now a days) Yes I understand your annoyance at not being told but surely the pros out way the cons and if your child is an only child (which I'm guessing is tight) they will learn so much from mixing with the older ones I see I see it as a huge bonus.

The nursery my DS used to go to did the same thing. Aged nearly 5, he was being moved into a room full of babies. Looking at if from the perspective of a parent at the other end of the age range, I used to think how dull for all the older kids having to be stuck in with a bunch of babies, with the staff focused on them and not doing anything age appropriate with them.

But, in fact, DS loved it. He adored being with the younger ones and they loved having an older one to entertain them at the end of the day. They were always supervised, not dumped in together. I don't suppose they're juggling knives over her PFB head.

Siblings will generally be much more unkind to each other, vying for their parent's attention than they are with other younger ones. DS1 is 10 now and is vile to his younger brother but still great with other 6 year olds.

Doesn't bother me at all, my DD is 14m, she's quite small for her age and still crawling but I'm fine with it. Quite often I pick her up and she's in with some bigger kids. Makes sense as pick ups tend to start from 4 and I don't collect til after 5, I'd rather she had stimulation and spent time with other kids for the last hour and a half of the day than was bored in the baby room with no other kids. She loves watching older children play. Plus it's a chance to get them used to the bigger kids room and play with more advanced toys. There's staff there, it's not like she's going to be trampled on. In our nursery we pay the same regardless of age, up to pre-school.