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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be mad about the school photo

70 replies

ChunkyMonkey4321 · 12/07/2016 15:51

DS is in reception. They were supposed to be sent home with proofs for their school photo but he didn't get is. When we asked where his proof was so we could order the photo, teacher got a bit snippy 'I put all of them in the bag myself' but then I saw a copy in the classroom and he wasn't in it.

'well he wasn't here then obviously, that's why he didn't get a form.'

Except he was at school, which a quick look at the register confirmed. Turns out they were doing some fancy photo where they take pictures of small groups and then merge them together later when they're editing it. DS got forgotten about so isn't in the picture.

I called because I was worried that he'd gone missing or something and they hadn't let me know - but no they'd just forgot him. Now the photo company has photoshopped his individual school photo onto the class photo.

Would anyone else be annoyed about this or just me?

OP posts:

spanky2 · 12/07/2016 17:09

Yes I'd be annoyed. Unless he's invisible! I can't believe the teacher was so unprofessional.

AdultingIsNotWhatIExpected · 12/07/2016 17:18

Yes, I'ld be very annoyed/concerned, but not because of the photo!

I'ld be worried that if they can't efficiently sort the kids into groups, and keep track of the groups, for an "easy" task like the photo, then how am I supposed to trust them to keep track of all the kids on school outings?

RiverTam · 12/07/2016 17:19

But presumably your DS didn't feel left out of whatever or he would have said so on the day, wouldn't he? DD isn't in her Reception year photo as she was off sick that day, not the end of the world, she's in her Year 1 one.

It was an oversight. He'll only feel bad about it if you make an issue of it.

CigarsofthePharoahs · 12/07/2016 18:20

I've just got Ds's class photo proof today. It's one of the arty farty ones where they're doing different things. Guess which is the one child not smiling?
He's got a face on him that makes it look like someone just punched his favourite teddy. I can imagine him saying "But I don't WANT to be playing a bongo drum!" and then bursting into tears. Poor lad, I don't know if I really want to waste nearly £20 on it, which is the cheapest option!
YANBU op, I'd be annoyed if they forgot my child.

Twinkie1 · 12/07/2016 18:27

It's an accident, a mistake by the company that took the photos and didn't feel one way or tother towards your son so no malicious intent. Teacher put all photos she was given in school bags and so didn't think your son was missed off. Unfortunate but completely accidental. Untwist your pants.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 12/07/2016 18:28

My son used to hate the group photo because he's tall for his age and was always made to go on his knees while everyone else was standing.
I've never heard of a child (or legs) going missing from a group shot though
My niece was forced to put her arm round the girl who had bullied her all term in the class 'arty' photo.

AdultingIsNotWhatIExpected · 12/07/2016 18:31

It's an accident, a mistake by the company that took the photos

No it wasn't!
The photographer wouldn't have been in charge of sorting the kids and minding he ones who hadn't been in a group yet.

The photographer would have just said "okay, bring them in in groups of 4/5" and the teachers/TAs will have managed the child herding

and that's worrying! because what if they were off school grounds doing an activity? If they can't keep track of them well enough to get them all to another room in the school for their pics I'ld be worried about their child-herding/managing skills!

almostthirty · 12/07/2016 18:34

We had the opposite at our school and one child was in the group photo twice, in different poses. We went back to sitting on benches the next year.

Original poster

ChunkyMonkey4321 · 12/07/2016 19:09

Adulting - I think that's why I've been so upset about it. And other times he's come home and said stuff and I haven't taken him seriously. I asked him about the photo and he said, no i didn't have a class one I had one by myself. I said - don't be silly! But that's true so I'm worried about other stuff now - this is the only time I've got photographic evidence :(

Normal class photos FTW

OP posts:

CozImQuirky · 12/07/2016 19:22

This happened to DS at nursery. I went to collect him one afternoon to find them handing out the proofs, waited patiently, but didn't get given one. Asked them if they had his so they double checked the uncollected pile and couldn't find him, then told me he wasn't in the day photos were done. Oh yes he was, I'd made sure he was smart for his picture so where was his photo? They checked the register for that day and he was marked in, but they couldn't tell me why he had been missed, he must of wandered off with a different group.

I think that's what annoyed me the most, that they had no idea what had happened to him, let him wander and tried to dismiss it . They did apologise profusely in the end , but there was neither a single or class photo with him.

Arfarfanarf · 12/07/2016 19:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsHathaway · 12/07/2016 19:49

They're all in it and they all have legs.

I'm only intending to buy the class photo for the first and last years at school, so I'd have been amused in Y1-5 and annoyed in Reception or Y6.

If the Photoshopped version isn't too bad I'd buy it. By this time next year you'll be able to smirk about it.

Meanwhile, .

BackforGood · 12/07/2016 20:00

I'd be annoyed the school was choosing to have one of those ridiculous arty group things rather than a proper photo of the clss, tbh.

GlitterandSequins · 12/07/2016 21:24

We had the same child appear 3 times in my last Reception photo! We took them in 3 groups (60 kids in total) and he managed to sneak into each one as he liked the puppet that the photographer had!

Fairuza · 13/07/2016 07:15

If I was the teacher I'd refuse to get involved in photos at all next year if parents started moaning about it.

Of course having children sat in the school hall is different to school trips in terms of supervision - its a safe, contained space with 1 or 2 adults to 30 children. If they leave the premises its more like 1:5 or 6.

coffeetasteslikeshit · 13/07/2016 07:35

I hate those photoshopped photos so much. Stopped buying them after pre - school. Such a lot of money. I feel like offering to go in myself and take the photos (can't do any worse) and then just email them for free to parents.

StaceyMummyof3 · 13/07/2016 15:23

I loved my class photos of when I went to school..went in a photo album to be able to look at anytime I wanted...I still remember some kids..My 4 y.o. Daughter starts school in Sept and I'll be getting individual and class pics..I'll do it each year and with my other 2 children also ☺

user1468330875 · 13/07/2016 15:29

My main concern would be where was he when they had their individual photos done.

(Excuse me if I have misunderstood this)

diddl · 13/07/2016 15:42

There's a lot to be said for the "old style" individual photo & a class photo, isn't there?

You wouldn't think it would be that difficult tbh.

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 13/07/2016 15:50

We had the small groups for reception.

All the other years were benches

Until y6.

Y6 was small groups.

They kept a copy of the reception one in the class each year as they moved through the school.

Senior school ones. Not impressed.

Have to buy a big pack with fewer individual ones and more (bigger) class ones.

I have bought a single class one each year, for ds. But I don't want to be giving class ones out to granny at Xmas!

At least they have tried to fix it for you
And it sounds like they were trying to do you a favour with a portrait too.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 13/07/2016 16:00

My main concern would be where was he
The way the modern class photos are created by cutting and pasting images of smaller groups together to give the impression of a whole group shot means it's possible the OP's son was mistakenly left on the cutting room floor, even though he had his photo taken.

iminshock · 13/07/2016 16:47

I loathe those posed photos and would be delighted if my child was left out of one

TheSnowFairy · 13/07/2016 16:57

Slightly off topic but DD (then aged 7) was in her school photo wearing glasses.

She doesn't need, or indeed own, any.

However, her Build a Bear teddy does - and she was so desperate to wear some (despite the optician telling her she had perfect eyesight) she used them

Floggingmolly · 13/07/2016 17:05

The little monkey

Witchend · 13/07/2016 17:09

So maybe the OP can take comfort that maybe if her ds' face isn't in it, maybe his legs are.

At parental request we've gone back to traditional photographs this year.
However I'm not sure if the photographer was hopeless or cross about going back to that or the class teacher thought this,was a good opportunity to hide her least favourite children but they've made a pigs ear of it.
They have the row sitting on the ground. Only they're kneeling up. Those were mostly the tall children so they're blocking some of the row of those sitting on the bench.
Now you and I know that obviously the next row stands behind the bench don't we and then the row behind stands on a bench. All nice and so all can be seen.
Except for some inextricable reason they've done instead 2 rows standing on the bench. Most of the back row you can see most of both eyes, though not all.
I would blame the photographer unreservedly. However ds tells me the teacher chose who went on the back row and I know they're all the ones she isn't really keen on. Her favourite (who's a delightful girl ) is dead centre with a look like thunder on her face. So I'm not totally sure it's photographic incompetence.
Ds is actually looking quite good on the sitting on bench, but is one of the few not blocked by the kneeling ones as the children either side of him are leaning away. So I don't feel I can complain. I just feel shortchanged when I could have probably taken a far superior one with a cheap mobile phone.

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