AIBU to expect a bit more sleep?

[celeryeater]

Its a long one I'm afraid but any help would be appreciated!
Im a ftm Dd is 8 weeks old and ebf. We are also cosleeping. Dp has had enough of the lack of sleep and sleeps all night on the sofa downstairs. She was diagnosed as having reflux and we were given infant gaviscon but it made her constipated so we had to stop. She does seem to have gotten slightly better although last night is a bad example. Lately she has had terrible gas though.
I made a log of how our night was last night - please tell me what I'm doing wrong!

9.30 feed and I go to bed
11.50 dp brings dd to me in bed and fed
12.20 falls asleep in my arms on the boob but when I lay her down shes wide awake and wriggling
12.24 farting and dribbling milk on bed
12.34 dd still awake and wriggling
12.40 shove boob in mouth laying down to chill her out. Wish I had a dummy
12.47 dd chilled. Will try sleeping again
12.52 dd wakes up grizzling. Shove boob in mouth laying down to calm her
{2 HOURS SLEEP - ISH. IF I FELL ASLEEP STRAIGHT AWAY WHICH I DIDN'T}
3 wakes up wriggling and hungry
3.30 dd hurting nipple and not really eating anymore so I take her off and burp her. No burps. I go to the toilet
3.36 dd doing all the farts. decide to change fat wet nappy. Dd sicks up a lot of the milk she just had
3.43 offer other boob too in the hopes that the more she eats she might sleep a bit longer. Health visitors suggestion
3.54 falls asleep at the boob. Burp her - can't get anything other than a tiny burp up. Burp her on my chest and she instantly falls asleep. I am roasting alive so decide to open the window a crack. 3.57 Obviously dd wakes up when I lay her down so put her back on my chest to relax and burp a bit more
4.02 try to lay her down she starts smiling wriggling and farting. Also sounds like she occasionally sicks and swallows it again
,4.10 dd wide awake on bed farting wriggling smiling drooling out milk. I wish I had a dummy
4.15 dd starts to get grizzly and annoyed about something so I pick her up for a cuddle and she pukes hot milk all over me.
4.16 dd seems a lot more chilled and like she might fall asleep in my arms
4.20 dd reanimates annoyed about something. Lay her down and is grizzling and wriggling. Going to try putting boob in her mouth laying down
4.24 she starts taking a proper feed
4.30 wishing I could sleep like this but have to be in an awkward position to get boob in her mouth. I feel a bit sick. Birds are noisy outside
4.34 think dd has fallen asleep. I'm going to try moving in to more comfortable position
{2 HOURS SLEEP?}
6.40 dd wakes up wriggling eventually crying so feed her
6.54 dd finished so burp her but don't get much up
7.04 lay her down and all the wriggles
7.07 wriggles farts and crys so pick her back up on my chest, she struggles to get comfy... Eventually chills out in a really awkward position
7.13 dd can't get comfy on me so lay her down anyway and go for a wee and get some more water
7.17 dd crying by the time i get back so I pick her up to put her on boob and she throws up hot milk all over me then latches on
7.30 dd comes off boob and starts wriggling try burping her and can't get anything up so lay her on my chest to burp and hopefully relax her. She is asleep as I write this
7.37 dp comes upstairs

Some of my friends babies are sleeping 4+ hours in a stretch at night now but I don't have anything else to compare to. Is this normal?

Also both my nipples quite often look squashed when she comes off

I would possibly try combined feeding. BF all day then give 1 formula bottle at night - say 9:30ish.

My DD has gaviscon. Gave her constipation but it seemed to ease when he stomach got more used to having it

Tonight is a new night! Dd in own side cot which is now at an angle, fed and burped with dummy in face. Wish me luck!

Aaaaaw, she's gorgeous.

Definitely get her tongue tie seen too. It can make the world of difference.

Another thing I always found priceless when co-sleeping (I have 5DC) was bunging a thin towel or fleece blanket under my top half so baby sick and milky dribbles could be absorbed or whipped off without too much fuss.

Please investigate her tongue tie though.

Hope you had a better night last night. Get DP to take your Dd out for a long drive this weekend and snuggle yourself down in bed. Make sure you do this sat and Sunday then repeat every weekend until
You're all getting more rest

Sorry no time to rfft but my baby was similar

Definitely try not to put her down too soon , make sure she's deep sleep (her arm should drop if you lift it)
Google safe co sleeping, I managed to co sleep and feed and not move myself or baby at all, look at safe positions or ask a bf advisor to show you
Try propping up when you lay her down if you decide not to do above
Gripe water
She will grow out of it! (Mine did at 3mo)
Id think about talking to a bf advisor/refer to paediatrics, is it possible something in your breast milk is affecting her? Lots of my bf friends had babies who were lactose intolerant. But please don't cut anything out without proper advice!
Lastly. Well done on persevering, bf is not easy but you're doing a great job and your baby will be fine

Have some

Sorry I haven't had time to read all the comments but something jumped out at me. I was going to say have you tried cutting out dairy as my dd was just like this and she turned out to be allergic to dairy. Then I saw you already had but you eat a lot of Asian food. My dd is also super super allergic to soya and this is really common with children who are allergic to dairy. Have you tried cutting out the soya too. Worth a shot I'd say

You poor thing, I have been where you are now and remember it well. We tried (in no particular order) gaviscon, infacol, colief, gripe water, cutting out dairy, feeding lying down, block feeding, a dummy, raising her head, holding upright for 20 minutes after a feed and dangling her to get her to burp (way better than over the shoulder!)

I couldn't stop trying things because I was desperate for something to help so I could get some rest between feeds.

You've had plenty of advice but I just wanted to sympathise and let you know that the end could be in sight. DD started to improve very soon after this and by 12 weeks was feeding at 7pm, 10pm, 2am and 6am and actually SLEEPING solidly between those feeds.

Look after yourself, try to remember that you're doing a great job and that everything with babies is a phase that will pass.

Hi, yeah I think i will try cutting out soya next because I don't think the dairy done anything.
We had a better night last night... She did throw up a couple of times and spluttered it everywhere with the dummy in her mouth, but I think the dummy helped. She got a bit wriggly from 4am onwards but it didn't disturb me as much because she was in her own cot (and usually would be smacking me in the face with her fists!)
It's still hard to get her to burp, and I tried everything even getting out of bed and bouncing her around a bit. She goes down fine and then 5 minutes later starts wriggling and throwing her legs about poor little thing. Will try infacol next to see if it makes a difference.
Even if she sleeps better i will still be up feeding her every two hours... Sleep is something that I won't see much of for a while I think... Breastfeeding is hard and they don't tell you that in the classes! One thing I never considered is that if you breastfeed no one else can feed your baby and that's quite a big deal when you're getting so little sleep.

I had a DS with reflux. Literally the only thing that helped was having him slightly upright at all times, if he laid flat he would be so uncomfortable

Mine was like this for about 12 weeks. I couldn't BF due to total insanity from lack of sleep and switched to formula not because he slept better but so I could have a break. DH did til 10pm and then took over at 5am so I could sleep 8-10pm and 5-7am, we did that until he stretched his sleeps out a bit more, plus I got one night off at a weekend. I was completely insane with exhaustion prior to that.

Oh and I deleted every f*cker from Facebook that put how much their sodding child slept.

I know this is not a popular view, but I will say it anyway.
I would put your baby in her own cot in her own room with a baby monitor.
Lift the head end of the cot up higher than the foot end with a couple of books under the legs.
You have got her a dummy - good as it sound like she is a comfort sucker.
When she wakes, change her, feed her, burp her. give her her dummy, but her back in her cot and turn off the light. Leave her to it.
Do not make eye contact, smile or interract.
All this faffing around makes for a very unsettled night for both of you. You are waking up when she is unsettled, she is waking up when you go to the loo - it sounds a nightmare!

Aww cutie! My DS had constipation due to the gaviscon too. We went back to the doctor and they advised us to stick with it, and also gave us some drops to get things moving. Might be worth a try.

She doesn't ever seem to want to latch properly, falls asleep feeding, slides off nipple and spaghetti sucks it back in...

Also both my nipples quite often look squashed when she comes off

Yes this is absolutely classic tongue tie. Including the falling asleep feeding - which means she can never get properly full. She is finding feeding tiring because she can't latch properly.

I would highly recommend you get it snipped! It sounds daunting letting someone snip part of your baby's tongue but it takes 5 seconds, no worse than injections. Earlier done the better.

Definitely get this done and see if it helps before you try things like reflux meds and dairy free (which at best are a PITA and at worst could be harmful). NB it can take a week or so to see improvement after TT snip as they have to relearn to latch properly.

This sounds like tongue tie. Ring your HV today to get a referral.

Wow thanks guys! I will definitely be speaking to my health visitor, she's on holiday for the next 2 weeks though.

There must be another HV you could speak to I'd hope? Or a GP? Don't wait 2 weeks, the earlier the better...

Hi,

22wks DD here - I let her fall asleep in a cosy blanket being held by me, once the breathing is heavier I put her down but as she's on a blanket it's less jerky and she stays asleep.

It helps SO much - obv make sure the blanket is open (like a mattress topper) and put her usual cellular blanket over the top of her..

It all kind of blends into a more bearable routine, I find now instead of faffing time away on non essential things while she's asleep I just conk out quickly - house is sometimes a tip for the odd half day but I'm more sane haha X

Definitely see somebody as soon as possible. Try ringing your HV there should be somebody answering her calls or a recorded msg of an alternative number to ring.

Feeling your pain op. I have a 16 week old who for the first 2/3 months was like this.
Gripe water was a godsend, until it stopped working after about 3 weeks.
He has been prescribed ranitidine, for us it was too difficult to administer gaviscon due to bf and he was still being sick with it - just thicker sick :-(
I do wonder too, is she possibly over tired? We found that if ds didn't have a nap, waking up approx 1.5 hours before his bedtime he would have a really unsettled night. Now he's never awake longer than 2 hours then has at least a 30 min nap and his nights are much better (unless you count last night after his 16 week jabs)
He has also always fed every 2 hours, still does but will now go anything between 4-7 hours at night.