To wonder why when choosing a school parents go for the easiest option despite it not always being the best choice for their kids.

[Jackpack]

My Ds is due to start high school in September. We put down a catholic school with a great reputation, good feel to it and with excellent ofsted reports and results and for our second choice we put down an equally good community school, both around 2.5 miles away. My Ds does go to Catholic primary so he'll move up with the majority of his friends, most of whom live closer to the school but he'll also have kids in his year that live close by to us as one of our local primaries is a feeder to the secondary, so making friends local shouldn't be a problem.

The reason I chose these two schools is quite simple, the rest in our town are diabolical, in every way imaginable. I wouldn't ever want my child to go there and if we'd have been allocated one of these schools then I'd have quit my job to joke school him. That's how bad they are! So, there are I think seven children in our street in the same year as my Ds so they are going to secondary as well this year. Each of their parents have chosen one of the failing schools to send them to and two of my friends, and a family member have chosen to do the same.

Obviously it is their choice to send their child to whichever school they like but why on earth they have chosen these schools i don't know, but then it dawned on me, because it's easier for them, the parents not the child I mean.

Sending their kids to the nearest school means they won't have to get up early and drive them to school. One of my friends was on Facebook recently raving that she can stay in bed longer come September as she won't have to take her child to school. I mean come on. I realise that a lot of kids do go local and there are certainly advantages to that including walking with friends etc but what's more important, thier kids get to walk to school with friends or that they get a better education. If all the schools in the area are equally as good then o can see why parents would want their kids to go to the local school, but when they're all exceptionally bad why not try for a better school slightly further away. It's just seems like laziness to me.

surely everyone whose kid is moving to secondary school next year will not be doing to the school run any more - hence the lie in/later start to the day? OP's friend seems to be saying that rather than boasting about what a crap school she has chosen?!!

OP - just a revolting post really. If you'd like a medal because you've got your dc into a good school on the back of your dh being a catholic then fantastic - have one.

And as for going to the local comp- did you ever think that maybe some of the people who have 'chosen' that didn't really get a choice in the matter.......

A school that's had a RI judgement will be working incredibly hard to turn that around. Plus, actually schools often get that judgement because certain groups of pupils aren't making enough progress and while that is obviously something that needs to be addressed, there are often other groups of children doing marvellously well.

My kids moved primary school as we relocated and tbh there were many elements of their previously rated RI school that I much preferred to their current Good rated school.

Interesting that everyone is ignoring the few posters who had bone idle parents who sent them to the local shit school to their child's detriment. I guess their experiences don't fit into the mass agenda on here.

My dad sent me to the shittiest school, I'm not even sure if it was the closest one. I was the only one who went from my primary as everyone else's parents appealed and got them into a different school.

I ended up having an amazing time, great set of friends. The teachers were amazing and as we was known as 'the rough school' it made us all stick together more.

Maybe the child going there said, 'you know what mum, I like a lie in as much as the next person, I want to go to the closest one'.

And then the parents didn't force their little angel to go to a school they didn't want?

I think it's one of the most important parts of being a parent to properly research educational options and choose the school that your child will fit into - for some that will be academic, for others sports, for others drama, etc., but it certainly SHOULDN'T be just the one that's easiest for you!

Couldnt agree more, op - I also find some peoples choices odd. But they probably had a great time at school, and are just not aware of a) how much a bad school can set you back or b) if your in the wrong environment how much it can affect you.

We live on an island with the 11+ (for now...) Unless your kid passes to grammar or one of the single sex colleges or you can afford to fee pay, your kid goes to THE catchment secondary school.

Kinda glad, looking at all the angst getting slung round MN from you mainlanders. ;)

Interesting that everyone is ignoring the few posters who had bone idle parents who sent them to the local shit school to their child's detriment. I guess their experiences don't fit into the mass agenda on here

^ this

So what is your, actual, AIBU?

Dd's statement means that she gets my first choice of school regardless of catchment. Do you know what OP ? I didn't send dd to our catchment outstanding school much to everyone's astonishment I travelled a couple of miles and sent her to a community school that was satisfactory because I loved the ethos,I loved that it was a very mixed school community and I knew that dd would be happy there.
The outstanding Primary was shit in comparison, they rested on their laurels because the middle class catchment would have tutors if needed,they were interested in churning out children who passed their SATs rather than appreciating each child as an individual.
The two schools feed what is now dd's secondary,there is a far greater percentage of children in top sets from dd's Primary than there is the outstanding Primary because the secondary school makes their own assessments and whilst the outstanding Primary might have taught well how to pass SATs dd's primary had a far more rounded approach to learning (although having said that there was hardly any difference in SATS results in dd's year).
OFSTED outstanding isn't always the best way to judge a school's worth and besides which things can change very quickly both for the negative as well as positive.It may well be that other parents have seen good things in the schools they chose too.

Neighbour woman describes all of the local schools as dire. Then she puffs up with pride about the 'Outstanding' school her kids went to.
35 minute drive away.
Her kids only got into St. Outstanding Bollux because her FIL is the HT.
My kids got L6s at the "dire" local primary.
So I guess that's how much I don't care (shrug).

I will admit to a similar puzzle, though. Lots people say they "want to send their kids local," "keep them close" for secondary. And not because the parents don't want to get out of bed early. Our alternatives are all 8-10+ miles away (15 minute drive) but there are trains & charter buses. I didn't expect "keep them close" to be so important to so many.

Twice daily trips on the bus / train is huge social high point my kids say.

I refuse to play the religious game - faking faith to get into a school full of other people who fake faith - so we go to schools judgemental folk like you look down upon. Also means we get to avoid judgemental folk like you. Win win.

I'd love it if it's because the other parents knew something the OP didn't. I intensely dislike people who always jump to the worst possible conclusion with regard to the behaviour of others.

Try living rurally where you don't have a choice. We have the school where the bus runs to from the village (council bus for the school). Any other school we wouldn't get into as they are oversubscribed, and would require long journeys which I don't feel would be good for children.

Interesting that everyone is ignoring the few posters who had bone idle parents who sent them to the local shit school to their child's detriment. I guess their experiences don't fit into the mass agenda on here

I think the point is that we don't know that the neighbours are opting for local schools because they're bone idle - that's only OP's view. Given that at secondary level most children get themselves to school anyway, it's unlikely that laziness on the part of their parents has anything to do with it at all. For all we know, they have have made a very considered assessment that they don't want a catholic school and don't like the other school OP thinks is acceptable, or are aware that under their local admissions system their child doesn't stand a chance of getting in to that school.

And secondly we only have OP's word for it that all the local schools are shit. As has been pointed out, Ofsted isn't necessarily at all reliable on these things.

I think the OP should have joke schooled her child, regardless - it sounds funny.

No, but my point is that everyone is bending over backwards to think badly of the OP and come up with reasons why the neighbours might do this. But a few have said that yep, that was exactly what their parents did and it was crap.But apparently their experiences aren't worthy of note and even though we don't know, of course the OP is wrong to think what she thinks.

Just an observation.

Just an observation - it is wrong to assume the worst.

Maybe some of the people are making choices based on their awful childhood experiences of commuting long distances to schools they hated, but which their obsessive parents insisted were the best schools for them... There are multiple different possible reasons for any person's choices.

River - other have also said they have been sent to shit school and even loved it??

It's all subjective isn't it?

But if all the kids' parents chose the catholic school then there would be a lot of disappointed parents that still ended up with the rubbish school, and that could even be you. If you are happy with choice that is all that matters I guess.

Also remember what may be a fabulous school now, may in fact be in special measures in 5 years time. The poor schools may get extra funded and change in leadership and come right up through the ranks. I have seen this myself with my own DC.

Bright and motivated children with educated and involved parents will do well at any school. Come college applications and they will look spectacular with A grades from Sink Comprehensive Academy.

Have only read a couple of pages but I do hope someone's pointed out to OP that the whole of the mainstream allocation system is based on distance. At least in England.
Unless you have a child who qualifies for a priority category then distance is next.
I'm about to go into battle to get my dc into the right school for them but it will be a case of battling because we don't live in catchment.

I had to pull my dcs out of an Outstanding primary because it was shit. They cared only about academic results and the way they treated the kids was appalling. I moved my dcs to a school that was ofsted satisfactory - why? because that school cared about their kids....not because it was easier for me or that I didn't care....I actively chose a school that Ofsted would have considered to be failing. Other people from our old school were astonished but they asked me directly why I'd chosen such an awful school - they preferred the status of outstanding - I preferred to have happy children.