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AIBU?

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Original poster

To want to report her

128 replies

Northerngrump · 07/07/2016 21:39

My bil has got a new girlfriend. She's come up from London and moved in with bil into a house my mil owns, for minimal rent. Ive found out she has a council house in London that she's not intending on giving up so she's sub-letting it. This really pisses me off, as the shortage in council houses is well known, but also as they always plead poverty, but neither of them have full time jobs. I work my arse off and we just get by each month, and it bugs me that people use the system (and take advantage of my mil). It would be a shitty thing to report her - I think sub-letting is a serious offence - but some days I'm so tempted!!!

OP posts:
ColdTeaAgain · 07/07/2016 22:48

Yes someone gets to live there instead, but it's a council house that should be made available to the next person on the waiting list of she is not using it.

Don't understand ppl saying wait a while as she could be keeping it in case it doesn't work with the boyfriend. If she wasn't sure about it working out then why move in with him already? She is blatantly taking the chance to make some money whilst sponging off someone else. And if it doesn't work out she can kick the tenants out and have her house back plus the profits. Yep, I'd report her.

seasidesally · 07/07/2016 22:48

As for her renting it out ... well, at least that way, someone gets to live there?

yes just not the people it was intended for Hmm

so you would rather let her sub let, then the flat be given to a woman fleeing domestic violence with children who maybe has been in a refuge for 4 months ???????

tough if she has no where to go if she splits with DP she made her choice and choose to con the LA,she dosent deserve sympathy but somebody in need deserves the flat she is illegally subletting

WorraLiberty · 07/07/2016 22:49

Why are some people assuming she's making a profit and not just covering the rent?

Alasalas2 · 07/07/2016 22:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LauderSyme · 07/07/2016 22:51

Why do you feel unable to make that call?
It can't be because you would be betraying a good friend; she's just your bil's new girlfriend, so an acquaintance of yours at best.
Is it because you would feel like a snitch and don't want to see yourself that way, and don't think it would be fair?
What is really not fair is that this woman is royally taking the piss.
I usually think Worra talks good sense but I totally disagree with her here. Why are you worrying about the pisstaker?!
It is very hard to even get onto a council house waiting list these days, most people are not even eligible for the privilege of languishing on the waiting list for up to 20 years or more.

Most Councils have changed their housing allocations policies and you have to have a severe health issue, or be horribly overcrowded or be actually homeless, to have any chance of being housed by them.
Council house rents are about one third of private sector rents. Where I live, a 3 bed house in the private sector costs £900 or so a month. A 3 bed council house costs approx £350 a month. The ratio will be similar in London, but private sector rents are obviously much higher there, with 3 bed houses easily costing £2k a month or more.
You can betcha she will be charging her subletting tenants private rent rates so she'll be making a huge profit by screwing the system.
She does not need this house. If she did she would be living in it!
Do a favour to whichever lucky family will be offered the house once she is evicted. You will rescue them from an undoubtedly dire situation. Balance your unease about "dobbing her in" with your virtue for helping someone who really needs it.

apple1992 · 07/07/2016 22:53

Report. There are loads of families living in b&bs and hostels waiting for more permanent accommodation.

seasidesally · 07/07/2016 22:55

Why are some people assuming she's making a profit and not just covering the rent?

because somebody that has the brass neck to sublet a council place out will probably have the cheek to go for market rent

or maybe she is not charging any rent and is paying it out of her own pocket as she sounds the charitable typeWink not

WorraLiberty · 07/07/2016 22:56

I'm not saying I agree with what she's doing, but I think the OP is right to leave it a few more weeks before reporting.

Besides, it's almost impossible to prove a tenant is subletting anyway.

She'll get a letter, she'll go back to the property and no action will be taken because councils don't have the time or the money to spend, arguing the toss.

ghostspirit · 07/07/2016 22:58

i would leave it for now. does she have children. if so they would end up homeless to if things did not work out. and she would never get council again.

but also depends how long shes been seeing him is it likely to last. thinking more about the children if anything if she has any that is

ColdTeaAgain · 07/07/2016 22:58

Ok, granted we don't know if she is making a profit. I'd put money on it that she is Either way though, what she is doing is still wrong.

WorraLiberty · 07/07/2016 22:58

Right so, the only choice here is that she's charging market rent or she's allowing someone to stay there for free sally?

Not that she's letting a mate stay there and cover the rent, in case it doesn't work out moving to an entirely different part of the country, to live with a new boyfriend?

seasidesally · 07/07/2016 22:58

ive seen a couple of programes on tv about this exact thing,they are cracking down and rightly so

WorraLiberty · 07/07/2016 23:02

In reality they don't have the time, money or manpower to truly crack down.

All the she has to say is that she's in a new relationship and spending lots of time with her new bloke. That's why the neighbours haven't seen her (if the council bother to ask them).

In reality, as long as they're getting their rent money, that's all they care about.

seasidesally · 07/07/2016 23:02

she made her choice when she moved to be with DP

if she was so worried about it why didnt he move to hers

she is taking the piss at the end of the day whether she is charging rent or not,she had at least two choices live with DP or stay in her flat she choose the first

WorraLiberty · 07/07/2016 23:04

I don't disagree sally

However, I still think the OP is right to leave it a while before reporting.

HeddaGarbled · 07/07/2016 23:10

I think you should stay right out of it. You don't really know the full facts, just what you have "found out". You have some sort of grudge against your BIL and you are thrilled that you have something on his new girlfriend that you can pretend to be all morally outraged about.

ColdTeaAgain · 07/07/2016 23:12

It says in the OP "that she's not intending on giving up" which suggests to me that this isn't being done on a very short term basis.

I think I would give it a month and if it still seems like she has no intention of changing the status quo then I'd report.

Also perhaps your DH should think about having a chat with MIL about their piss taking ways. I can't stand it when people take advantage of others generosity like this.

WorraLiberty · 07/07/2016 23:16

I'm not sure how they're taking the piss out of the MIL?

They're working part time and she's letting them pay minimal rent, which is her choice.

Unless of course it ever transpires that she's charging market rent for the council place, which is unlikely imo as that's the quickest way to get caught.

DoJo · 07/07/2016 23:24

As a feminist, I cannot in good conscience recommend that a woman give up her own space immediately after moving in with her boyfriend.

Isn't that what almost everyone does when they move in with someone? I certainly don't know anyone who has moved in with someone and had a whole spare house/flat to fall back on if their relationship went tits up.

trafalgargal · 07/07/2016 23:30

Id be very careful.
Despite the people who know she's subletting -it is entirely possible there's a different scenario going on -like a friend is housesitting until she gets organized or there's a previous partner she has left who is still a tenant etc.

Family gossip isn't always reliable and it would be a shame if you got it wrong and there was a big family rift because you'd believed gossip.

Frankly it sounds nuts to me -what kind of idiot leaves their own flat in an area with plenty of work to move in with a boyfriend and his Mum - Does not compute.

Woodhill · 07/07/2016 23:30

What does your mil think.

Yes it is bad but ooh what if this relationship fails. I don't agree with her subletting

hotdiggedy · 07/07/2016 23:42

Are you sure you have your facts right? Pretty massive thing to do to someone on stuff you might have just heard.

Birdsgottafly · 07/07/2016 23:53

Would you report her if it was a private LL? Or if she owned the house and the Mortgage company didn't know?

It's an ethical dilemma, if the answer is no. Why should a lower income Woman put herself at risk, if she just wants to make sure that her new relationship is workable, first? She probably has 'less means' than the first two.

Have the courage of your conviction and tell them that you will report them, if it continues.

That way she can end the subletting. I think that as long as the rent is paid, the ability to stay somewhere else, should be available, for a few months.

The housing crisis is being created, but everyone says "fair play", to those that buy-to-let.

Why do you need to sneak around? Have the courage of your convictions.

EveOnline2016 · 07/07/2016 23:58

There could be a huge twist and the women may be claiming housing benefit as well.

SomeDaysIDontGiveAMonkeys · 08/07/2016 00:06

It's s recent relationship. At least give her a few months. She's probably thinking if the relationship with your bil doesn't work she at least wl t be homeless.

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