I thought I'd share my poem I wrote this morning dedicated to the worms!!
Ode to the Worms!
Twas the night before treatment and all through the house
The family itched but no sign of headlouse
The itching was not in the families hair
It was a squirming sensation, right down there
The children were scratching whilst tucked in their beds
While out of bottoms; worms poked their heads
And mum aroused from her late evening nap
Saw the white wigglers after taking a crap
Mum shrieked, her teeth began to chatter
Dad came running to see what was the matter
Away to get a torch dad did dash
He bent mum over, inspecting her arse with a flash
The worms they shone like flecks of snow
Back up mums bottom the worms did go
Then what to dads wondering eyes should appear
Another stringy thread from out of mum's rear!
These worms were disgusting, so lively and quick
Dad yelled as he felt an itch on his dick
The children hearing shouting climbed down the stairs
To see mum plucking the blighters from her pubic hairs!
‘Now Chardonnay, Charlie, Angel and Brad
We’re infected with worms, just look at your dad!’
Sweating profusely without any pants
Dad appeared to be doing a strange kind of dance.
He itched and he scratched until his behind was raw
The children all traumatised with the visions they saw
Then suddenly the children all began to twitch
Pulling their underwear trying to ease away the itch!
All night the shenanigans continued all ‘round
Screams of delight as each worm was found
Then in the morning they showered and dressed
Dad runs to the chemist for bottles of Ovex
Upon dads return they all took a pill
The ordeal had left mum, feeling quite ill
She bleached the whole house from bottom to top
Out came the hoover, the steam cleaner and mop
They sat still in silence, the rest of the day
In hopes they’d done enough to keep those worms at bay
By evening dad had gone for a poo
The worms visibly dead floating around in the loo
A couple of weeks later they’d readied for bed
When across mums face came a look of dread
She started to twitch in an unusual fashion
Dad looking panicked and decidedly ashen
‘Quick, get the Ovex, come quickly you jerk -
Why oh why did this crap not work?’
Dad read the instructions and then realised
They forgot the next dose, what a horrid surprise!
Again they scrubbed, cleaned and medicated
To personal hygiene they were all dedicated
Those worms were now gone, not one left in sight
Finally no more bum scratching night after night.