I started a new job as a nursery manager three months ago. The old manager, let's call her Ann. had been promoted to area manager but the plan was for her to stay as manager for my first month whilst I found my feet before starting the new role but being based in an office on the top floor of our building. First week went well until the Ann was involved in a car accident and wasn't able to work.
The last three months have been really hard, we've had quite a few issues as well as an ofsted inspection (which thankfully went very well!) and the team have been amazing. The deputy manager and room supervisors stepped up to support me and show me the ropes and we've all developed great relationships with each other. They've all worked so hard and I am so grateful for what they've done. From what they've said my managing style is completely different to what they've been used to and they seem to be enjoying coming to work and the general feel around the building is a lot more positive.
As a thank you, I took the staff out for tea and a few drinks in a pub on Friday evening. Nothing rowdy or anything and it wasn't in a place local to nursery. We had an enjoyable evening and some stayed longer or went on to other places after I left about half ten.
Ann came back today and just in conversation I mentioned that we'd gone out on Friday. She said nothing at the time. This afternoon a member of HR team from head office called in to see Ann and I got a call asking for me to come up and see them. I was told by Ann that my socialising with the staff outside of work is inappropriate I itself but to actively arrange and pay for an evening is unprofessional and a cause for concern. I explained that it was a thank you and asked her to show me a policy relating to this that forbids managers from doing this and she said she couldn't but hoped that I would have used common sense to decide if I should or shouldn't do this. She said that she wouldn't give me a warning at this time but in future I need to be aware of what is expected of me on my position and that she will consider disciplinary action if this happens again. The person from HR was taking notes the whole time and I was told I would get a copy. I was so shocked and confused that I didn't really have much to say back to her at the time!
So was I being unreasonable to treat my team to a pub tea and a few wines considering there is no kind of policy or rule stating that I can't?