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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Using benefits to go private

81 replies

Madhouse05 · 26/06/2016 21:46

Ok, I know this Mum who is receiving 'in work tax credits' and other benefits. She is now using the 'extra' money to send her kid to private school (like 12k a year one). Her lifestyle is not luxurious but she's def not going without (drives a 'desirable' car blah blah).....AIBU to think that if you can use the 'extra cash' for something like this you are not in need of propping up by the state and that this is wasting other tax payers money that could pay for things like the NHS....

OP posts:

Grilledaubergines · 27/06/2016 00:53

OP I'm ashamed to say I used to Believe the rubbish you clearly do, but then I became one of those single parents and thankfully woke up to myself and reality. I work full time and get, from memory, about £18.00 a week in child tax credits (single parent element), and no working tax credits because my salary is higher than the threshold (which is a good thing as far as I'm concerned as whilst all extra money is helpful I'm not in the situation of many who despite working full time and bloody hard too, can't sustain any more than a very very basic standard of living).

What I choose to spend my £19 a week on is frankly my business (in reality it just goes in the pot which pays for mortgage, bills, food, petrol or whatever.

You need to stop thinking with the attitude that those in receipt of financial help are living luxury lifestyles.

It's more than likely that this person has assistance from the school direct or her parents. I know a few people whose children are at private school because of the generosity of grandparents.

Please lay your resentment to rest, along with your belief that tax credits make you rich.

LadyStarkOfWinterfell · 27/06/2016 05:45

Someone could get £12k in tax credits but only if they have several kids and at least one on DLA
They wouldn't be in a position to spend it on private schooling because of pesky things like rent, food and clothes

mamamea · 27/06/2016 05:49

I don't think the OP claimed that the cost of private school was fully funded by tax credits, merely that it costed £12k.

Tax credits are not means tested (you can be a millionaire and get tax credits - they check income, which can be fudged - but not savings and investments), so that's why some wealthy people receive tax credits.

MsJamieFraser · 27/06/2016 06:14

It's entirely possible if she' getting hefty maintance from the child father.

I don't understand what business it is if yours however OP!

LadyStarkOfWinterfell · 27/06/2016 06:32

And if she's getting maintenance then it's the maintenance that's paying the school fees not the benefits

Liiinoo · 27/06/2016 06:33

In a lot of families I know the grandparents very generously contribute to school fees. Perhaps that's the case here? In one family an ex-stepdad paid the childs school fees. It seemed mad to me but it worked for them. Or maybe fairies leave the cash at the bottom of her garden?

Dontanalyseit · 27/06/2016 06:36

Yes her ex is probably contributing and may be paying the fees or giving her thousands.

BertrandRussell · 27/06/2016 06:36

"Should I have sent him to the local comp to be in keeping with my tax credit receiving status?!"

Heavens no! Perish the very thought!

Alfieisnoisy · 27/06/2016 07:00

She won't be funding that herself, it wouldn't be possible on benefits. The likelihood is that it is being funded for the child by his father or other extended family members.

I am on benefits....not a chance I could fund private education AND I get extra benefits as DS is disabled.

She is getting funding for this from elsewhere.

twirlypoo · 27/06/2016 07:22

Sorry Bert I was being very tongue in cheek I promise

AppleSetsSail · 27/06/2016 07:27

Good luck to her and her son. stop peering at her through your curtains

Eastpoint · 27/06/2016 07:30

My dds' school would pay her school fees up to 100% depending on her parental income if she was the right fit for the school. None of your business.

mamamea · 27/06/2016 08:18

"She won't be funding that herself, it wouldn't be possible on benefits"

Says who? If you for instance inherited a million pounds, then you could very easily afford both private education, AND claim substantial tax credits.

NedStarksHead · 27/06/2016 08:22

I really love how much people claim to know about their acquaintances.

Fuck off

feathermucker · 27/06/2016 10:42

Nothing to do with you.

You may find the child has a scholarship etc

ElinoristhenewEnid · 27/06/2016 12:44

I am really pleased that this mum can send her child to private school.

I had some friends who were on benefits - she had severe mental health problems and he was her carer so their total income came from the benefits system.

Their 2 dcs were very bright and they applied for them to go a local prestigious boarding school.

Due to the grandfather being 'in the forces' previously they were able to apply for a means tested bursary for which they were awarded 100% remission. This included full remission from all schooling, boarding, and extracurricular activity fees, uniform and other equipment fully funded. All they had to pay for was pocket money and out of school clothing.
The dcs thrived at the school and have subsequently been to university and now have very well paid jobs so are contributing back to society.
The bursary and schooling gave them a much needed lift to fulfil their potential despite their difficult home circumstances.
Hopefully this mum's dc will get the same results!

Lottielou7 · 27/06/2016 12:51

OP, you sound nosy, bitter and jealous. HTH

The arrogance of people who think they know the financial situation of others just by how things appear on the outside is quite unbelievable.

Mind your own business.

BertrandRussell · 27/06/2016 13:00

"OP, you sound nosy, bitter and jealous. HTH"

To be fair, according to Mumsnet, anyone who has any issue at all with private education is "bitter and jealous".........

Callwaiting · 27/06/2016 13:00

This is an awful post!
Judgemental/ jealous/ bitter - I've no idea which but it really is none of your business.

Tiggeryoubastard · 27/06/2016 13:03

To be fair to OP this could be true (if imaginary friend sold her goat for a good price).

OldManJenkins · 27/06/2016 13:07

Tbh if she's entitled to it and wants to spend it to better her children's life who will probably pay it back when they work why not.

Lurkedforever1 · 27/06/2016 13:16

Spot on op. Lone parents all get a special type of tax credits that nobody else knows about, called 'life of luxury' element. It is for private school, nice cars, and if you don't have a purpose built 6 bed council house, it pays for luxury private rents.

There's definitely no such thing as bursaries, scholarships, maintenance, or relatives paying.

BeingHuman · 27/06/2016 13:39

Troll, in the dungeon!

SheHasAWildHeart · 27/06/2016 13:45

OP I am a single mum getting some TCs, don't tell anyone but sometimes DD and I go on holiday! Sometimes we eat out at nice restaurants!

Mimicat44 · 27/06/2016 14:27

It's none of your business

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