To want DH to pay me for my Fitbit?

[SecretlycrushingonTomHanks]

So my birthday was in March and DH bought me a Fitbit, cost him about £60. I don't do a lot of walking, maybe 1 long walk a week, as we live in Scotland and it's always raining! I do 5-6 fitness classes a week though which the Fitbit doesn't track so it's basically a waste of time to use it hence I never have. DH looked into it before he bought me it so he knew this and id never expressed a desire to have one. Every year (for the last 10 we've been together) DH does this at birthday and Christmas times. He'll spend a silly amount in money on something that I don't really want or need and sometimes have actually asked him not to buy. Another example was a big fancy box of thortons chocolates one Christmas that cost £35/£40 which he ended up eating as I don't even really like them and had said before Christmas that I don't know why people buy me thortons chocs as I never eat them! Anyways hubby does
quite a bit of walking and his birthday has just passed. For his birthday Dsis and DBil bought him a black wrist band so now he uses my Fitbit! I can think of so many things (namely new clothes as I don't have much such DD2 was born 9 months ago) I could've spent the £60 Fitbit money on! DH got birthday money from a few people. AIBU to ask him to buy the Fitbit from me? For the record he didn't ask me if he could have it just asked DSis and DBil for a band then set it up for himself and took it.

I think whatever you do now (and I'd be selling the Fitbit to the highest bidder, whether that's your husband or a stranger on eBay) you do need to sit him down before the next occasion and tell him that you're not happy with the lack of thought he's putting into your presents. Even if you have to set up a wish list on Amazon, that would be better than him buying you things you don't like which he happens to like.

I would give him first refusal but flog it if he was at all

Going to put it to him once DC's are in bed. Everytime I look at it in his wrist I want to shove it up his backside . Definately going to sell it as I've got a special night out in a couple of weeks that I really want a new outfit for and could afford it if I got £40 for the Fitbit.

I was just about to say it reminded me of the Simpsons episode...

Marge's birthday, so Homer buys her a new bowling ball with his name on it! Homers favourite hobby is bowling.

Let us know what happens!

Seems like a lot of passive aggressive suggestions/ game play on this thread. I'd just talk to him about it

And I could be way off base, and if I am I apologise but also the fact he has no access to money at all, apart from around when it's a special occasion, I feel some would talk about possible financial abuse, but financial abuse aside, is it possible he does it because he has no access to money he tries and pulls a fast one and get something for himself in bad disguise for yourself

Another one for selling it op, hope you have the fit bit in your hand as opposed to him having it in his ass

I think YABU and incredibly petty. If you didn't want it, you should have asked your DH to return it to the shop. It's too late for that now so you've basically re-gifted it to your DH and it now belongs to him. It seems very spiteful to take and sell something that he gets a lot of enjoyment from. If this really bothers you so much then take £20 out of your account and buy yourself a treat next time you go shopping.

And also, Fitbits are suitable for everyone, not just people who do 'long walks'. I don't know why you're so sure that your DH knew you wouldn't like it?

For all the people saying OP should simply take some money out of the joint account and buy her-little-self something pretty.
The OP has said at least twice now that birthday presents are budgeted for and there is no spare money to that! Therefore the £60 DH used to buy himself a Fitbit was her entire opportunity to get the new clothes, now sat on his wrist.
I'd agree if it was bought as he genuinely thought she'd love it, but missed the mark on this occasion then it might seem petty to sell it, but are people missing the part where he has done this for 10 yeas worth of birthdays? And that he asked his sister to get him an empty Fitbit wristband, in a colour more to his choosing, for the express purpose of taking ownership of his wife's birthday present form him?

Fit bits are really for runners and walkers girloverboard or at least the version I have is. I wore it to a class and it didn't pick up anything I did. I don't do a lot of walking and can't run because of hypermobility issues. I'm better off at my classes which I really enjoy as there's less impact on my joints. twittwooery it's not financial abuse as he has access to money whenever he wants he just needs to say he needs the card, doesn't need to tell me why even. He would have full access to the bank with a card if he hadn't been very silly and I had to open an account in my name to sort it out. He's too lazy to set up his own account that I could transfer money into for him. I should've asked him to return it girl you're right and I think in future that's what I will do. I didn't re gift to him though he just took it and started using it without asking.i said to him I was going to sell it last night and he got a bit huffy and tried to talk me out of it. When it was clear that wouldn't happen he said he'd buy it from me so it all worked out in the end . We also had a chat and I think from now on he'll ask about presents so the money's not wasted.

YABU

It all sounds a bit petty.

Talk to him about future presents. Tell him in future you want to choose your own presents or right a list so you get what you want. Let him keep the Fitbit. Easy and no drama.

You could have got him to take it back straight away if you didn't want it. It all sounds too petty for me when this problem is easily solved.

Missed your update OP

Glad it is sorted.

right= write

Good resolution OP, I hope you enjoy whatever you get with the dosh

Glad it worked out op

I find these threads so miserable - always the same petty fixation on things and their monetary value combined with an infantile sense of grievance.

It's not an infantile sense of grievance if your partner consistantly buys you things that you have said you don't want and which then turn out to be presents for them delivered under the guise of being for you. It's indicative of selfishness and not caring enough to actually listen to you.

The monetary value is also significant if there isn't a lot of money to go around and one of you is wasting it.

I'd feel really embarrassed to buy dh a present that I knew was really for me. It is not U to expect your birthday gifts to actually be for you!

I would tell him what you have told us here. I wouldn't show him the thread but tell him his presents often are more for him than you and the fitbit is an example of that.
I also wouldn't wait for your husband to ask you what you want for Christmas and birthdays. Tell him and if you want to choose some clothes tell him you want the money to choose some clothes with and no surprise presents instead please. You can discuss this in your fitbit talk.
Selling it now seems churlish. I would try and get extra money for clothes though as the fitbit wasn't really YOUR present.

See you've had that chat (I just saw the beginning of that post and thought it was all about what a fitbit is). Glad things are resolved.

Thank you HopeArden. We don't get a lot of things in this house all our money is spent on DD's and family time for DD's like breaks away, cinema trips etc. So birthdays, not so much Christmas, are a time we can really have a nice treat. We don't even get to celebrate our wedding anniversary as it falls in a month where we have loads of other things things to celebrate eg. other family members birthdays, wedding anniversaries etc. So it would really be nice to get something I'd like and will use rather than something that he gets to use on top of the nice things I bought him for his birthday. We're a young family surviving on one average wage at the moment as due to bring self employed I didn't get any maternity pay after DD2 as I wasn't entitled to it. Times are a bit rough but we know it'll get easier as DC's get bigger and I start working again. I think that's why I was anniyed as well this time because it's an even bigger waste of money this year in particular.

Good result OP!