To think fake grass is not tacky

[Dizzydodo]

At the Doctors with dd about eczema, GP says it can be triggered by pollen, grass seed etc and asks if she's been in the garden a lot with the nice weather. I say 'yes but we've got fake grass'. GP rolls his eyes, laughs and says 'fake grass?! Like Wayne Rooney? Goodness me!'

I have no idea if Wayne Rooney has fake grass or not and I'm not in the least bit offended by the GP (I think he was trying to be funny) but it got me thinking....does fake grass in my garden make me a wannabe WAG?

Tinklypoo, there are many poor grass maintenance choices you have listed there. Yes, if you want a perfect lawn then that might be the path someone may take. But my lawn is mowed using a push mower, I never water or fertilise it and there are many different lawn plants growing, not just grass.

It is possible to have a small lawn and also plant shrubs around it,

In return, I have pollinators visit my grass, birds dig for worms and pick up beetles.

Hoovering an artificial lawn also uses energy and manufacturers often advise using herbicides to keep them clear of unwanted plant life. Some also advocate watering it in hot weather to cool it and make it useable. It may be convenient, but in no way can it be construed as the green option, despite what manufacturers may say. Sadly manufacturers have huge budgets to sell these things, nature has no budget.

meglet, blackbirds cannot access worms through artificial lawn.

It was a bit more expensive than turf but we would have had to buy a lawnmower so we saved that cost. It gets a bit warm but no more than the patio (garden is north facing).

I meant this thread to be light hearted, everyone has different tastes and I don't really care if internet strangers don't agree with me.

pensivepolly I'm not sure I mind what class people think I am (I'm not sure I even know), but I went to Waitrose last week and am going to Center Parcs soon, does that redeem me in the class stakes

oybbk as I suspected then . It's going to be the 21st centuries version of concreting front gardens.

It has its place. When I was a child we lived for a time in a house with a concrete yard, it was horrible to play in and some fake grass would have been a massive improvement. However taking up a large, well established good quality lawn and putting down plastic grass is a bit tacky.

I hope it's not tacky because we are having some put down in the back garden on Tuesday. The choice was either that or gravel (we rent) which would rule out the use of paddling pools etc.

every garden round here has bad drainage problems. Apparently when they built the houses they just compacted all the crap and rubble and dumped a load of mud on top. We had grass when we moved in but after just a few days of rain it turned into this.

Those with dogs and fake grass... What happens if the dog pees or shits on it? My dog's favourite place to do his business is the garden, despite us living opposite a big green hill and dragging him there every few hours. We have a tiny strip in our garden which was once scrubby grass and is now bark chips - I'd like to replace with fake but I'd be paranoid about my garden shitting pooch!

Neighbours of ours put it down, initially I was a bit meh when I heard what they were doing, but they've gone for some very expensive stuff that looks rather good. It's very practical for them, they have 2 children running around on the lawn all year round, our gardens are shady, the soil isn't brilliant and maintaining a lawn is very difficult.

Daily, my cousin picks it up, disposes of it, then washes the lawn with some hot soapy water & a designated brush. I see it as one of the advantages over a real lawn, you can actually make it fairly clean after a dog poos on it.

Our labrador is a very tidy shitter, small and firm so we just pickup up immediately. He prefers to pee on the gravel so that's not an issue for us.

Everything drains away really quickly as there is about a foot of gravel/drainage material underneath. When our dog is occasionally unwell/messy we pickup up/wipe up and then flush through with hot water and some washing up liquid followed by the hose. No more of a faff than on normal grass.

yabu it's horrible.
if you want low maintenance have slabs or decking.

I think it's a sad world we live in where we have plastic grass. What next, plastic trees and birds?

Nature is beautiful and we should cherish it, not screw the plant up further.

Sometimes I think the Disney film Wall-E isn't far off what could happen.

Planet*

I would say if you have a dog, we were recommended a shorter less lush looking (cheaper) grass for easier clean up. It looks like fake grass, but still looks better than dead grass, or all gravel or slabs etc.

It's very tacky, and extremely bad for wildlife. No wonder there are so many species in decline if this is what people are doing. Luckily, I've never seen this in my area at all - the locals obviously have better taste and a decent conscience.

Should be banned.

It's rough and itchy, horrible stuff.
I suppose if you buy the really expensive, decent quality stuff it can look and feel nice but the pile by the door in Morrisons looks like the height of tackiness.

Nature really is beautiful and you get idiots screwing it up.

Sorry, I'm 39 weeks pregnant and grumpy.

It must be horrible for the environment. That's my only 'concern' about it. If I wanted my garden to look like a 1970s butcher's window display I would go for fake grass. Sorry! I'm with your GP. A patch of grass, weeds and all, beats a plastic 'garden' hands down.

I'm not a neat and tidy garden lover (I'm sure some people would think my rambling affair is a mess), but it's not for me. I would be very much in the camp of each to their own if it was just down to appearance but I am worried about the cumulative impact on the environment if it is becoming the new thing (not seen much of it here in the sticks yet). Because of this I would find myself being a bit judgey if it was put in for convenience reasons alone as opposed to things like for allergy reasons or in an area nothing would grow.

I think it can look good and be appropriate some friends have it in a small back garden that gets a lot of rain and not much sun, and it works as a good alternative to paving. In a big sunny garden where it's a bit naff and lazy.

This happened where I live a few years ago
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/2195853.stm

They tried to give us fake trees
We didn't stand for it and they were taken down very quickly

There are other ways of maintaining a natural 'lawn' it just takes bit of thinking out of the box -

1. Use small herbs, hard wearing plants. It doesn't HAVE to be grass which is a weed anyway btw. funny how some weeds are acceptable and others aren't.

Just keep it trimmed, don't spray or fertilise it (unless you use a non chemical one like seaweed or nettle feed).

The birds and insects will love it. The children will learn about different plants etc.

I also agree that it's not particularly good environmentally.

insancerre Blimey I've heard everything now, real plastic trees the world has gone mad.