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AIBU?

To think that students shouldn't be making teachers cry FFS!.

307 replies

Theydontknowweknowtheyknow · 10/06/2016 20:05

...and that the school system is essentially fucked because teachers have too many pressures and are treated like crap?

DS is not good at Maths. He's not badly behaved but is not good at Maths hence he is stuck in a set where the kids tend to be badly behaved.

The teacher is obviously not a native English speaker but DS says he is perfectly understandable. His classmates however are constantly teasing this poor man about his English. It became so bad today that the teacher actually cried and then lost it and yelled at the kids that he spoke 5 languages and they only spoke one.

I feel so sorry for this guy. He must be at the end of his tether but how can he possibly teach and be effective with 30 students, all the marking, planning and politics. I feel like it's an impossible task.

But what can the government/society do to make teachers' lives easier, especially when you consider the drop out rate or is it just inevitable that with so little money and so many children to educate that the school system is essentially fucked?

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Rubixx · 10/06/2016 20:09

Sorry but my honest opinion is he needs to toughen up. Being a teacher is bloody hard but kids acting like that comes with the territory. He should have raised it with the head of department or head of school before it got to the stage of breaking down in a class.

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BillSykesDog · 10/06/2016 20:10

It doesn't sound like he can control the class.

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CookieDoughKid · 10/06/2016 20:14

The teacher needs support from the school and the badly behaved kids need to be on some kind of disciplinary. I would complain loudly to the school and support the teacher and I would want to see an improvement plan in place.

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Theydontknowweknowtheyknow · 10/06/2016 20:15

Well obviously he can't control the class but they sound like they are bullying him. If they were doing this to another pupil they'd be pulled up for bullying so why should he have to put up with it just because he's an adult?

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SarahM24 · 10/06/2016 20:15

I think a lot of parents would be mortified at how their little angels really behave at school. It's a tough job and you couldn't pay me a million quid to do it. Sounds like he's reached breaking point and needs some support from his seniors but unlikely to get it tbh

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Theydontknowweknowtheyknow · 10/06/2016 20:16

Cookie, I did think about bringing it up but I don't want the teacher himself to get into trouble

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rusmus · 10/06/2016 20:19

I have to agree with Rubixx. I am a teacher and every school, however crap, has a behaviour policy. Follow it ruthlessly, make sure the kids and their friends know you will follow it, don't show them when they get to you ( yes Y9 period 4 today, I mean you!) and accept that sometimes you will have a bad day.
But don't cry in front of them because if they have teased you to the point of tears, once they see them, they will want to see them again.
I have just moved school after 5 years at a school in Special Measures/ requires improvement and right now, I'd give my husband's left nut to be back there. The kids are giving me such a hard time at my Good with Outstanding features school.
It will pass and on Monday I will love my job, despite the DFE/marking.
Once you build a relationship with the students and treat them like humans, they will be on your side and the job is brilliant. It just takes a while and you have to persevere.

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elephantoverthehill · 10/06/2016 20:20

If your Ds is not good at Maths, and I suspect his classmates struggle as well, so that is why they behave poorly, why are there 30 in the class? In an hour lesson the students get less than 2 minutes individual help from the teacher. Students who struggle need more individual help.

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ciele · 10/06/2016 20:23

Teachers in tears was the norm where I worked. But in the toilets. He should not let them have seen him cry. It's not a job for those with a thin skin or poor tear control.

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mineofuselessinformation · 10/06/2016 20:24

elephant - to answer your question - because the school can't afford to employ any additional teachers. It's not ideal, but it's what schools have to deal with nowadays ( not that I agree with it, it's just the way it is).

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rusmus · 10/06/2016 20:25

Maths is a shortage subject. The school may have to have large classes due to lack of staff. But you are right, individual help does benefit students.

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FeliciaJollygoodfellow · 10/06/2016 20:26

elephant are you being funny? What secondary school is able to have fewer kids in some classes?

The teacher should have left the classroom before the tears came, but the children are obviously horrendous little beasts if that was his reaction!

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rusmus · 10/06/2016 20:26

Cross post, mineof....

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timelytess · 10/06/2016 20:27

I began teaching in 1993. On interview day at my first (high) school, the students declared their intention of making me cry.

In the following twenty one years, pupils rarely made me cry. Staff managed it quite often.

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ConcernedParent88 · 10/06/2016 20:28

We made our maths teacher cry by adding an 'o' on the end of Thom Heart's name on his work on the wall. Some teachers shouldn't be.

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apple1992 · 10/06/2016 20:29

I agree that so many parents would be mortified if they saw their kids in class.
Seeing it from this perspective makes you see many MN school related posts it a totally different light.

Sounds like he is struggling, but also that he isn't being well supported. Agree that teaching is not a job for the faint hearted!

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rusmus · 10/06/2016 20:30

In my first lesson at my previous school, a girl said to me, as she left the (frankly shit) lesson ' We'll break you by Christmas'... They didn't but I went home and did consider not going back!

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CookieDoughKid · 10/06/2016 20:31

The thing is your kid loses out and not because of his own doing! You have nothing to lose and everything to gain to report this to the school. Emphasise that you are not criticising the teachers teaching bit about behaviour management of certain kids in the class. I would not want my child to lose out and nor would i see the class lose a qualified maths teacher and end up with supply teachers!

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RiverTam · 10/06/2016 20:32

I have just read a long article in The Economist about what makes a great teacher, the upshot was that the training, both pre- and on-the-job is nowhere like good enough (this is looking at the UK, US and Australia), particularly in classroom management. Very little peer assessment, observing other teachers and assessing each other, learning from fellow teachers. I'm not a teacher but it made interesting reading.

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Theydontknowweknowtheyknow · 10/06/2016 20:32

It just feels weird to me that we expect people to go into jobs where the possibility of mental battering is seen as quite normal.

I know the whole "firm but fair" personality is a necessity but I just wish teachers were given more support.

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Momtothree · 10/06/2016 20:33

You want to get your son moved to another less then

Kids are awful and find messing about funny and they like to be talked about - only it isn't in the good/funny way they think they're being talked about

One girl in DD tutor is often excluded and her parents called - she's a little spot darling and her parent s don't believe the teachers - stop excluding her and get the parents in to watch a live feed! See how precious she is when she fails all her subjects and lands a hard grind job because she's 'funny'

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apple1992 · 10/06/2016 20:34

I agree OP. 'But you're paid to deal with it' is a response I've had recently.

You're expected to take a bartering from both kids and parents. I am an emotional punch bag. But thankfully resilient!

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LordoftheTits · 10/06/2016 20:35

I went to a shit school full of rough, rude, lairy kids and I saw two teachers cry in my time there. I don't think it's always down to the teacher being 'thin skinned', some classes are just horrible.

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Theydontknowweknowtheyknow · 10/06/2016 20:35

Yes Cookie you're right. It pisses me off that the well behaved but not very bright kids have to put up with disruptive thugs. I'm going to say something from that point of view.

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kesstrel · 10/06/2016 20:36

It's outrageous that teachers should have to put up with this. There are too many schools where management doesn't back teachers up with regard to behaviour, and leave all the work of setting detentions and chasing non-attenders to the teacher, who in most cases will already have far too much to do already. Or they even blame the teacher for the poor behaviour, claiming that children would behave well if the lessons were more engaging! Or where, if new teachers follow the behaviour policy, and actually refer disruptive pupils to senior management, those teachers will soon find themselves with a black mark against their name.

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