Mobile phone ban on overseas school trip

[anotherglass]

12 year old son is due to go on his first overseas school trip to Belgium later this month.

There is a strict ban on children using mobile phones during the trip.

Part of the trip will involve a period of up to 2 hours where children will be allowed to wander around an open, retail precinct - unsupervised. Teachers will not be far and kids will have cards - in the local language - to hand to someone if they are in trouble, during this activity.

Parents were not made aware of this unsupervised element of the trip, prior to making payment.

I am nervous not only about this element, but also the fact that there is a heightened risk of terrorists attacks during the period of the trip, which coincides with Euro 2016.

AIBU to insist on son being allowed to take his mobile phone on the trip?

00100001 If your point is that if I had ever organised a similar trip to the one my DD went on I would not want mobile phones, I disagree. As I said, I don't even think the teachers on the trip were aware of the "ban" as they certainly didn't feel the need to contact the office themselves so probably assumed the children were doing it and were quite happy. My DD was 15 at the time and there is a fat chance that she or her friends will be phoning home with homesickness or causing any other problems if she has her mobile phone. The only difference will be that I can contact her to find out if there are any delays on the journey home, something I can't trust the school to do.

Dh insisted ds2 take his phone on a trip this year. Ds was too busy having fun to reply right away to dh's messages. That made dh worry, even though I pointed out he was busy, which is another reason for a phone ban. It may make parents panic when they can't get hold of their darlings.

I wonder whereabouts in the UK these helicopter parents live and what their children actually manage alone at age 12.

This has been standard for trips abroad for my kids (now 23-17) . When they are " unsupervised" actually they are in groups of 4 with sensible instructions - 4 because that is 1 to fall and hurt themselves /lock themselves in the loo etc , 1 to stay with them and 2 to go find help.

I live in a big city. By 12 the kids usually use public transport and go to bigger shopping centres than in Belgium anyway! They are sort of streetwise, and at least with mine they know how to risk asess a drunk bloke shouting in the street etc ( not that you'll get those in an enclosed shopping centre anyway!).

The kids in the hotel with the drunk " rampaging" were firstly in rooms with locked doors so not really at risk and secondly should surely have worked out ring reception if they were stuck?? It's Belgium not Timbuktu communication in English will work.

Don't send the kids if you/they can't sleep at night because they haven't communicated with you. Don't send them if you disagree with the schools plans . It's easy really.

However , remember that you poor little 12yr old will very soon be 16/18 and surely, by then they need to be 100% able to be independent and they'll only do that by starting early with " baby steps" like this .

marynary but you haven't run a trip like this, so what authority are you speaking with? What makes you know 'better' than those that have run trips before?

I have been away with 15 year olds that have been homesick... just because you think your DD wouldn't, doesn't mean others wouldn't get homesick.

Between the ages of 12 and 17 my two boys managed to go to Iceland, Belgium, France ( several times either skiing,Disneyland Paris or war memorial tours), Switzerland, Turkey, Holland,Poland and Norway either with school, Explorers or with friends and they didn't take a phone.
The school didn't allow them to and on the others I didn't let them take it.

It was good for several reasons. It gave them a break from being reliant on the phone. They had to find other ways of getting information when they were out and about without having to rely on Google and Google Maps. I think it did them good to have an initial sense of panic about not being able to turn to a device for all the answers and entertainment and then find alternatives.

The main reason though was too make sure they didn't accidently leave data on!
However I accept a phone is just not a phone, In fact I can hardly remember the last time I spoke on mine but use it for music, films, maps, photos, internet, emails etc etc.

and my point is - when you have organised a trip like this with mobile phones, then you can say whether it is pointless rule or not.

Marynary your problem was caused by the school not having procedures in place to advise of delays, not your DC not having a phone.

I assume schools have a system that allows them to text all parents in one go? Or Twitter, a Facebook page, or group email system? So they should just send a message out to everyone concerned, like they would at other times that they would need to disseminate offical information (changes to opening/closing times for bad weather etc). That would be the 'correct' way to do things, not rely on DCs to accurately pass the message on.

I haven't ran trips abroad but have done 5 day ressidentials in the UK with youth groups to places like the Yorkshire Dales, Lake District and Scotland. Groups of teenagers + mobile phones can be an equation from hell!
Lost chargers and face book updates are two of the minor issues that can get a group whinging but when they find there is no mobile signal that's when the moaning really starts!!!!

I've had a situation about 6 years ago when unbeknown to me a young person rang up mum to say she hated the trip ( we had been in Coniston for an hour ) and wanted to come home and everyone was being mean to her etc etc. That night mum and dad arrive at the Youth Hostel to pick her up to find her taking part in a '........... .......... High School has talent' competition that we put on with her singing at the top of her voice having a laugh with her mates. She didn't want to go home and parents were pissed off at driving for 2 hours (each way) and some how it was my fault.
Mobiles on ressi's be dammed!!!!!

Try not to worry even though it sounds a little scary at first - It's a fairly standard rule on school trips and the kids will be perfectly safe.

I think we have all forgotten what life was like before we all had mobile phones - myself included - we all survived somehow, but the thought of going anywhere without one now seems terrible let alone allow my kids to leave theirs at home, so I can understand how you feel.

Your son will love Belgium and the whole adventure of going away. He may even leave his phone alone for long enough to tell you all about it on his return, you never know!

Actually, WhathaveIlost, you've brought up a good point.

What if reception is crap in that particular area? What if the child can't make a good morning or good night phone call because the signal isn't getting through? Or, like my DH who works abroad sometimes, he/she sends a text which takes 2 or 3 hours to get through cyberspace?

Just because they have a phone with them doesn't mean they can use it. Blimey I have enough problems getting a signal in Tesco sometimes to text DH saying I'll be a bit late back from the weekly shop!

I remember going to Madrid when I was 12 and not using a phone once. My mother enjoyed the peace. I'd be more concerned about it being in Belgium with all the recent activity there (my husbands European offices are in Brussels and they've even said only urgent trips need be taken).

Sounds normal to me too.....we survived school trips in France and Spain unscathed without phones, wandering towns, etc. its a good chance to learn about planning where and when they will go, watching the time on their watches, using a small map of the area, etc. maybe talk this all through with your child before they go so you feel they understand they have to take responsibility for themselves for a while at this point of the trip?

Sensible of the school. Blooming phones - life did go on perfectly happily before them!

Yabu.

marynary but you haven't run a trip like this, so what authority are you speaking with? What makes you know 'better' than those that have run trips before?

I don't have to speak with "authority" I am speaking as a parent who was very inconveneced by a thoughtless (in my opinion ban on mobile phones) Not all people who plan trips do ban mobile phones though. What makes you think you know better than the organisers that allow them. Following this thread, I have actually just checked the information for my younger daughter's (age 13) school residential at the end of this year and mobile phones are now allowed. Perhaps it has occurred to someone that if children can be trusted to walk around a major city independently they can perhaps be trusted with a mobile. As I said, it would have been extremely useful when elder DD was on a school trip as she would have been able to contact me regarding whether they were late coming back.

inconveneced inconvenienced

But the inconvenience was just that, and a failing of the school. Not the direct result of having or not having mobile phones.

I know better that from experience things run better without phones. And I am yet to come across an organisation that does allow them.

Sensible of the school. Blooming phones - life did go on perfectly happily before them!

So I presume that you don't possess a mobile then? There used to be pay phones everywhere. There are very few around now.

The 'thoughtless' bit of the incident was not having a proper procedure in place in the event of a delay. If your Daughter had her phone on her in that case and she had no battery/signal, the problem would have remained.

THe staff in charge will have mobile phones, and they will be using them for necessary contact with parents/school/each other.

A child ringing up their parents every morning/night is not necessary and causes undue stress/tension/upset when things don't go as planned.

There are sound reasons not to bring the phone, which outweigh the 'need' to bring a phone.

Is anyone else saddened at the idea of a child having to text mum night and morning "or she won't sleep properly"?

Incidentally, my dd's school had a form telephone tree that was handed out at the beginning of every school year. The school rang the top number- that person rang the next and so on. Useful for all sorts of things- school closure, late back trips- anything.

But the inconvenience was just that, and a failing of the school. Not the direct result of having or not having mobile phones.

It was a direct result of the school not informing parents while at the same time banning mobile phones. As I parent, I I can't make the school be more efficient. Obviously I can ask the school communicate better but there are certainly no guarentees that anything will happen as a result. In contrast, I can ensure that my child communicates with me when travelling home from the school trip by giving her a mobile phone.

I know better that from experience things run better without phones. And I am yet to come across an organisation that does allow them.

You have only talked about your experience of quite young children getting hysterical because they are homesick. When children are older and mature enough to be independent in a large city they are mature enough to have a mobile. I can be useful. As I said, DD's school now allows them, as do a couple of other organisations I know.

I can be useful it can be useful

Is anyone else saddened at the idea of a child having to text mum night and morning "or she won't sleep properly"? sad

To be honest I am. As a parent I have fears and things that concern me like everyone else. However since the boys were young I have encouraged independence and resilience. I have encouraged them with their travels and to follow their dreams but also to have a back up plan.

This doesn't mean I care less than parents who need contact feedback. I am immensely proud of them ( and tell them that)
Just because you encourage independence doesn't mean that they are emotionally going away from you.

To get a child to text night and morning is not giving them breathing space to be on their adventure and is more about the emotional needs of the mother.
I loved picking them up from trips and they would be bursting with excitement to tell me their tales. If they are ringing me up twice a day, what's left to tell!

Incidentally, my dd's school had a form telephone tree that was handed out at the beginning of every school year. The school rang the top number- that person rang the next and so on. Useful for all sorts of things- school closure, late back trips- anything.

I relies on parents co-operating and do their bit though. It dd work at dds primary school (due to one parent not bothering to phone) and I very much doubt it would work that well at a secondary school.

dd didn't