AIBU to expect my Dh to stop drinking?

[Spermeetegg]

Ok so to put this in prospective we have been together for five years and trying for a baby for three years I have children from a previous marriage dh does not we paid privately to go to a fertility clinic where we had tests and found dh to have slightly abnormal sperm motility the consultant told dh to stop drinking and take a vitamin c and zinc complex and told me to loose weight dh is seven years younger than I am at nearly forty I feel time is against us (although my mum was 46 when she had my youngest sibling) to date I have lost almost two stone which is half way to my ideal weight and has been a hard slog dh only takes the tablets when I give them to him and we seem to constantly have the same conversation about his imo excessive drinking feel like I'm at the end of my tether!

blithering I think your friend who won't go over the limit in case her 20 year old children need her, needs to get a life quite frankly. That's ridiculous. If she wants to do it for herself fine, for the sake of adult chidren, weird.

I didn't know it was illegal to be drunk when caring for a child. Not that I am as I hardly drink. I'm struggling to open policeuk.com forum for more info. I've ascertained it's illegal for children under 7 on an ask a lawyer forum.

I know several people flaunting the law.

He does sound to me like he has a problem with drinking. I won't tell you to LTB but you need to make the call about whether you want to bring children into the world who will have an alcoholic father. Be very clear-sighted about that - you had an alcoholic prent yourself - so did I - and it does lasting damage. But only you can make the call either way.

So having spent half the night questioning my every thought, I decided that honesty is always the best policy I have had a clear and Frank discussion with him.
having taken all opinions into consideration I believe our relationship is worth fighting for, but am absolutely resolute that despite that I will walk away if change doesn't happen he is adamant he does want children, but I have told him for the time being we will not be ttc as I need to see action from him and not just words. I'm not good with confrontation normally but feel quite empowered by making the ultimatum I have done, and feel that this is the right decision for us both!
To clear up a couple of questions I am nearly forty he is 32 his 18 cans of bud habit is maybe once a month he does however drink to some extent maybe 6-10 or so cans every weekend and when his team are playing.
we are not usually in financial difficulties it is an unusual month as we had to pay out a very large bill (normally have over a thousand pounds of disposable income each month) and he has never before taken bill money to fund drinking.

Why are you even considering having children with this man? Bringing children into this environment? Sounds hellish.

I'm glad you've come to a decision not pressured by strangers. I really hope he will understand the gravity of his behaviour and take steps to be a better partner and future father.

Why are you splitting hairs over what sort of an alcoholic he is? He really doesn't sound like he would make a good father at all. Please see sense here.

At the moment tower I'm not the situation hasn't always been this way it has really come to a head over the last two months and I would say he has chosen to drink inappropriate amounts for the last year before that nothing of concern.

I feel I have taken the steps I needed to I have left him with no shadow of doubt that this is make or break time
If I felt he couldn't or wouldn't be a good father I would not have considered ttc like I said this behaviour is recent and this issue aside we have a very good relationship and he is very good with my two children