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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this kid wasn't my responsibility?

49 replies

HighwayDragon1 · 02/06/2016 16:30

There's a craft shop in my local town that put on workshops for kids during the holidays. The staff set up activity and then leave the parent with child / children to attend the shop, there's only two people who work there. This is made clear at the beginning of the workshop. Crafts can take anywhere between half an hour to two hours depending on what you do and how carefully your kids do them.

So I'm helping dd in workroom, a woman and her dd came in and had activity shown to them when the staff member left the woman sat her kid down and walked off. I was busy helping dd so didn't realise at first she'd left. Half an hour passes, the mum still awol. We finish our craft and go into the shop to pay, I was about to tell the woman on the till this kid was in there on her own when the mum came back into the shop. She saw me at the till and demanded to know where her daughter was. She was literally screeching at me that I should have been watching her kid that she was only 5 and how could I leave her?! I was open mouthed, as was the shop assistant. The woman went to see her dd who had paint all down her (duurrr!) She came back into the shop and told me this. I told her her kid was not my responsibility and if I'd have known that she was only 5 I'd have called the police (girl was very big I'd have put her at 7ish)

We then left, I could hear her ranting at the shop assistant as I left. Who leaves a 5yo with a stranger and assume they'll watch them without a word? Who then has a go at said stranger for not watching the kid?

The woman is batshit yes? I can't report her to anyone, I don't know her name and only know the kids first name. Unless store has cctv?

OP posts:
Catmuffin · 02/06/2016 16:33

Yanbu

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 02/06/2016 16:33

She's a tit, maybe the shop will report her for being an abusive arse to their staff but I doubt it.

SissySpacekAteMyHamster · 02/06/2016 16:36

Not your responsibility. The woman should've asked if you could watch her daughter and should have used actual words rather than telepathy!

Obviously it's totally your right to say no as you didn't know either of them.

As you didn't have the option to say yes or no, she is clearly bonkers.

KittiesInsane · 02/06/2016 16:36

Did she assume you were one of the staff rather than a random other parent?

eatsleephockeyrepeat · 02/06/2016 16:37

Any chance this nut job woman misunderstood and thought you were running the activity and would be looking after the kids? Is the fact parents should stay with their children obvious in the shop?

If not I'd be blaming the shop for you getting an earful if she could reasonably have assumed they would have someone there with the kids, even if she wrongly assumed that was you. Although really she's the one who should be blaming the shop if they didn't adequately communicate "the rules" and let her leave her 5 year old there without pulling her up on it...

Also, how horrible! Silly woman shouting at you, that's really unpleasant even if it was perhaps a big misunderstanding.

nancy75 · 02/06/2016 16:38

Did she think you worked at the place? I can't think of any other reason for her behaviour

MadamDeathstare · 02/06/2016 16:38

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WorraLiberty · 02/06/2016 16:40

So weird.

EveryoneElsie · 02/06/2016 16:40

Even if she thought you worked at the place why on earth wouldn't she introduce her daughter so you knew her name when you helped her with the activity?
She sounds like a nightmare.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 02/06/2016 16:40

Did she think you were staff? If she did still not on,but slightly less harsh it.

Numberoneisgone · 02/06/2016 16:40

I am guessing she mistakenly thought you worked there and it was a supervised activity. What a doughnut.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 02/06/2016 16:40

Harsh it = bat shit

5Foot5 · 02/06/2016 16:42

Of course YANBU

The only explanation I can think of is that she assumed you were a member of staff in charge of the whole room. Maybe she didn't realise you were helping your DD because she was your DD but because it was your job to help all children in the room. Hence, she thought, wrongly that you were paid to mind her DD.

I know you said it is made clear what the set up is but if she is a bit of a dick then it probably wasn't clear to her.

AugustaFinkNottle · 02/06/2016 16:56

Does the shop have a notice clearly showing that they don't take responsibility for children doing the craft activities? I know in shops like Games Workshop they are careful to make that clear.

TheKingArrives · 02/06/2016 17:03

OP, she clearly thought you worked there. You should've just said, 'Sorry, but I'm not staff, I'm here with my DD'.

Lilaclily · 02/06/2016 17:06

Agree she was cross because she thought you were in charge of the activity , didn't you explain that you weren't when she was yelling at you ?

Leigh1980 · 02/06/2016 17:11

How come none of the parents mentioned who are in the wrong are ever Mumsnetters 😫 It would be great then they can explain themselves. But truthfully are probably so into themselves that the thread couldn't possibly be about them😄

AnneTwacky · 02/06/2016 17:14

Even if she did think OP worked there, she still shouldn't have left her 5yo and skulked off without a word.

MothertotheLordsofmisrule · 02/06/2016 17:16

Is the museum craft mum on tour this week?

Abraid2 · 02/06/2016 17:17

Was it a very dangerous craft? Involving flames or sharp tools?

Can't quite see why it was so dangerous for a five-year old to be left for a few minutes in a room adjacent (presumably) to the till, anyway. I frequently left mine in the kitchen painting while I went to answer the door or upstairs to put washing away.

cleaty · 02/06/2016 17:19

Even where there are paid staff, you would not be allowed to just leave your kid without a word. Staff would have to take information such as emergency contact.

PolaroidsFromTheBeyond · 02/06/2016 17:19

She clearly thought you worked there and were supervising the activity. Which doesn't make it ok for her to leave her DD without a word but does explain her attitude somewhat. Did you explain that to her or could you not get a word in edgeways?

RitchyBestingFace · 02/06/2016 17:20

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SecretMcSquirrels · 02/06/2016 17:23

Another tricky craft workshop.

Lilacpink40 · 02/06/2016 17:30

YANBU. She will in future be more likely to check that her DD is ok before leaving her and not make assumptions. So she's learnt an important lesson!