Am I being unreasonable to still be blaming everyone else? Regarding my son's accident. Mainly his Daycare.

[DeJong01]

Hi,

I'm from The Netherlands, so please bear with me.

At the beginning of January, my very special little boy lost his life.

He started Daycare when he was 3, it was a nice local one and it was so family like. I had looked at bigger ones and they seemed to just not fit what my son needed, so we went for the smaller one. He loved it there.

He would go on a Daycare Outing once a week. Usually the park or one time a month they would take him to a bigger trip out. The zoo for example.

He was 4 at the time, and they were taking the children to a fun park place. There were rides, and characters and some lovely little things for the children to do. I hadn't even been but I of course assumed it would be good, as his Daycare had chosen it.

There was a certain things which children his age could participate in which were mainly bouncy castles or things similar. I had him in the care of his Daycare, assuming that they would risk assess these things. I do not believe the floor protection was enough and I think any normal adult could see that. I don't know why anyone let any of the 4 year olds take part in it.

My son fell on to the floor, there was no protection. I still blame the workers at the place and the Daycare workers who didn't bother to think of safety. I am in pieces that no one else seems to see why I still have so much rage in me. They tell me not to blame other people as it isn't their fault and just a terrible accident. However, if things were done properly it never would have happened. I'm sorry, I finished counselling last week (I had 12 sessions) and I would have had a session today, so I think that's just what's making me need to express this anger again.

[Gardenbirds123]

I am so so sorry that you lost your beautiful son. I cannot begin to imagine how you must be feeling. January is no time at all and I think its normal to still be raw and angry. To be honest I don't know if I would ever be able to let go of the anger, but I hope that you are able to find a way through it and that you have friends and family nearby. We are also all here to support you and remember your son together. Hopefully some lessons can be leant from the police investigation so that the gift of his short life will make a difference to many other children in the Netherlands and worldwide. Maybe channeling this aspect of the tragedy could help you navigate your way through it. With love Xxx

[Creampastry]

If this is ongoing with police involvement should you not get this thread removed as people are aware of who you are?

[youarenotkiddingme]

I'm so sorry for the death of your son

I think it's natural to be angry and want answers. I second what previous posters said - can you continue therapy?

[justmyview]

OP, I''m so sorry for the loss of your son

It was wrong of me to post the link. I'm sorry if that added to your distress. I didn't think

[Alisvolatpropiis]

So sorry for the loss of your son.

I think how you're feeling at the moment is entirely natural, the anger I mean.

[Teresalosingtheirleaves]

Yanbu to be angry. It's perfectly natural. I would feel angry too.
I'm so very sorry for your loss and your deep heartfelt sorrow.

[SolomanDaisy]

There's not much point in people commenting on health and safety and risk assessments and supervision levels for nursery outings. All those things are completely different in the Netherlands, which doesn't have the UK's health and safety culture.

[KoalaDownUnder]

No, you are not being unreasonable.

I would have so much rage in me too.

Sending you so much love and sympathy.

[TurquoiseMoon]

Definitely not, so sorry for your loss

[TheSnowFairy]

the anger will fade in time but it has only been a few months.

Look after yourself x