To change my driving instructor because I am still stalling after 10 months of lessons?

[twirlywoo69]

As the title says. I have been having lessons for 10 months and unable to drive my lesson without being prompted for 80% of it. I feel very nervous on the road and find driving really difficult. I still make frequent mistakes and usually stall or roll backwards at least twice a lesson. I really panic whenever I am at roundabouts and in town centres which also results in me making mistakes as I go completely blank. Im not sure if it's just me that is rubbish or my instructors method of teaching. Starting to feel quite down and embarrassed about how rubbish I am after so long. Is it normal for some learners to be stalling still etc after 10 months? Am I just a slow learner or should I just change instructors?

twirlywoo69 you're very welcome! Reading your post, well it could have been me just over a year ago, uncanny...! Best of luck X

I would suggest changing instructor and trying to fit in more lessons a week. One hour a week really isn't enough to get the hang of it. Could you take a week off work and book some intensive lessons (say 2 hours a day, plus something relaxing for the rest of the day), then keep going with 2 hours a week until you pass.

If you're still not getting it then consider learning in an automatic instead. Yes, it is limiting if you can only drive an automatic, but it is less limiting than not driving at all!

Good luck!

Change instructor if you are not happy.
I had 3 in the end and my 3rd was simply amazing! There is nothing wrong with changing instructor, driving lessons are very expensive and a lot of money to waste on not progressing.

Give a change a try!

I mainly drive my own car and can struggle with other cars, particularly large ones that aren't really designed for small drivers. DH's accelerator drives me around the bend because it pivots from the bottom of the pedal. Having really small feet instead of his size 11s, and having the seat high and pulled forwards means that I have to be super subtle with how I put pressure on my foot, and my leg is uncomfortably jammed between the angle of the seat and pedal. Trying to learn clutch control in that car would have been a total nightmare!

(When we've tested out potential cars for him, there's been some that I've just sat in and refused)

What shoes do you drive in? I started off learning in thick soled trainers but struggled when my instructer changed cars so I switched to ballet shoes and have never looked back, you can feel the pedals and engine so much more!

Never even thought about the shoes! I wear trainers wow that's something to think about! X

Not sure the advice about shoes is good. Yes there are some shoes which are easier to drive in than others (flip flops and high heels are obvious ones to avoid), but really you don't want to get in a situation where you can only drive with one pair.

I took ages to learn to drive too but a good instructor who is patient and reduces your anxiety is what you need. It wasn't till I had a good instructor that was not irritated by my ineptitude that I finally began to make progress - it still took loads of lessons but I did pass the test in the end.

A BMW diesel seems like a big heavy car to learn in!! Most lessons round here are minis / corsas / small cars.

Ten months is way too long. Ditch him.

Another vote to go automatic, it leaves all your concentration for the road.
They are a lot more popular nowadays, and much easier to drive.

You can always take a test in a manual a few years down the line if you want to, but an auto will suit you now.

pinklady it is pretty common for people to have 'driving shoes' which just get left in the car. Once your experience and confidence has built up it'll be easier to relax it anyway but it made all the difference for me and my driving instructer thought it was a brilliant idea and that more people should consider what they drive in.

he shouldnt get stroppy at 32 lessons which im sure you are paying £15/20ph

he cant teach you the biting point, which is what makes you not stall

its a hard thing to learn but once you have found/mastered it then you will always be able to find it

maybe spend a lesson literally finding the point on a small hill

sounds like you have lost faith in your teacher so wont hurt to look for another one

10mths and i would expect someone to put in for their test

have you done theory yet?

sounds like you need more practice as week, do you have access to a car and practice/drive with a friend

i used to go to an empty carpark in the evening/round the industrial estate so closes/not much traffic about

You can do it, OP, honestly you can. It may be that a different instructor would help, or a different car, but ultimately it now sounds like your nerves are getting the better of you. They can be overcome, because if I can, anyone can.

I passed my test first time at age 21. I have a slight disability which means I'm restricted to automatics only. I was never a confident learner because of the disabilty, and I even doubted that I should have passed the test, that's how low my confidence was.

I drove a few times after I passed, but very infrequently, and I totally think this was the main reason I developed a phobia about driving-lack of frequent practice. Within a few months of passing, I got all sorts of hang-ups about where I 'could' and 'couldn't' drive (wouldn't do big roundabouts, wouldn't drive anywhere I that I'd have to rely on road signs, etc). Eventually I stopped all together. For 20 years!
When my DS was a toddler I got so fed up of being restricted to struggling on public transport with a disability and a pushchair that I decided to get refresher lessons and give it one last go.
Was the best decision of my life.

It wasn't easy, I was like you...sleepless before the lessons, and the first time I sat in the drivers seat I was trembling and sweating with nerves before I even started the car! But I went with a driving school that was known for being good with nervous drivers, and the instructor was great. Very relaxed, calm, didn't make me ever feel that I was ridiculous. Even when I burst into tears at the wheel in the outside lane of a dual carriageway at the 'incredible' speed of 40mph because 'It was all just too much!' . Seriously, it was mentally draining to start with, but the key, the absolute most important thing was getting out there and doing it frequently. Practice, Practice, practice. Not just once a week, but two or three or four if possible.

A few months on, and I was driving everywhere. Literally, I have been all over Britain, and there's nothing I won't tackle now. Roundabouts, Spaghetti Junction, the M25...I am confident, and (reasonably!) calm, I get in the car without even thinking about it and I actually ENJOY driving.
Years later, I am still amazed that I could have gone from being so scared of it, to this. So yes, you can do it. It may be worth looking around your area for a driving school that specialises in nervous drivers, I know that made the big difference for me. Getting over my fear really is the best thing i've ever done. Good luck!

Oh, and I second the advice about the shoes. Trainers are not the best for learning in I don't think as the mask the 'feel' of the pedal and engine too much because of the thick soles. Try a thinner soled flat shoe for now, until your confidence gets better.
Also, automatics...worth considering if you feel the clutch is always going to be a problem, and isn't just a temporary mental block. I have to drive automatics only because of my disability, the only slight downside is that there isn't quite so many small automatics for sale second-hand, and you possibly won't be able to benefit from cheaper road tax with some of the small engined cars, as autos tend to be over 1.0L etc. But for ease of driving, they are a no-brainer. I'd probably drive an auto even if I didn't 'have' to.

Just to agree with everyone else you don't need to agonise over changing instructors, just do it. I think going for flat shoes is a really good idea. I would maybe try those first before going straight for automatic but would pick a driving school that offered both.

Then request a 2-hour lesson in Milton Keynes and you'll never fear roundabouts again

Always go with someone private not big companies because private instructors want to build up a fan base.
I was with AA for months and on the day of my test I backed out, lost my money. After re booked my test for 4 days later, found a random private guy via google and I passed. He taught me more than I ever learnt with AA.

If you learn to drive manual, then you can drive manual or auto. If you learn auto, that's it - you're stuck. Better to bite the bullet and learn manual and give yourself some options. Especially when buying a car. Insurance is going to cost you enough as it is.

I first started learning with Red driving school - awful, awful instructor. A 2 hour lesson would involve her getting me to drive without stopping out of town for the first hour, down sameish roads, then turn around and go back. She also used her mobile phone to send texts while I was on a national road for the first time.

They also had a card and she would tick when I'd done something and then said I was ready to do my test. I wasn't, I failed several times. Got a new instructor who kindly said I wasn't ready - and passed a few months after starting with him.

I have only had 3 lessons with my instructor. I am getting confused with his instructions. For example, he would tell me not to be in a hurry, then when I reduce gas he would prompt me to 'put gas'
On the second lesson I found a cat in the road, when I stopped he told me to "keep driving, it will move when it hears the car engine" I refused because it's a hazard and unlawful to deliberately run over an animal I have seen. I had to ask him to go out and chase it away from the road.
Third time I was doing reversing round a corner, he told me to close my eyes while he steered the wheel! Three whole times!
How do I learn with my eyes closed? It went beyond me I don't understand why. Should I change my instructor? What would anybody do?

Change instructor.

I had 3 lots of lessons with 3 different instructors. The first lot was when I was 17. The next lot at age 24 and the 3rd about 2 years later.

The 3rd instructor taught in a way I could understand. And suddenly it all made sense.

Definitely change instructor and do a 2 hour lesson instead of one. I haven't passed my test but I've dumped my instructor who was intimidating. I felt impending doom everytime I had to take lessons with him. My driving got better after driving with DH. Hope I pass my test next month!

It's worth a try.
I had an instructor who after a dozen lessons still wasn't allowing me to drive on any public roads. I spent hours and hours doing the same simple, basic manoeuvres over and over despite being quite proficient as far as I could tell. He was reeeeeeally dragging the lessons out. It caused me to have very little confidence in my driving ability.

He started to tell me about how he was working privately as an instructor and kept trying to get me to take my lessons to him (I had bulk bought with BSM already)
It wasn't until he was off work one day and my lesson was with another instructor that I found out I should have been on the roads for months. The new instructor was aghast at the fact that I was still reversing around corners for entire lessons. I think he must have said something to the BSM bosses as I never saw the crappy instructor again. Thank fuck. He was a creepy bastard too. He once asked me if I was on my period and told me that I should let him know when I was because he would get me a plastic bag to sit on in the car!!!!!! WTF?!
I wasted hundreds of pounds with him so yeah, change instructors if you feel that you're not doing well with one. You never know if they're trying to keep you hanging on to squeeze more money out of you. Of course it's extremely rare but my experience says it can happen.

Oops, a resurrected thread. I'll bet OP has a license by now.

If you have access to a car, I'd advise spending time on clutch control. You don't even have to drive on the road, you can stay on a driveway, but find the biting point over and over until you learn what you are listening for and how the car responds. That will help the stalling issue

Sounds like a good idea. I did something similar from about the age of 10 and then lots of other driving practice. This meant that when I was 17 my lessons were more about driving on the road than the actual physical driving.

Reading people's assessment of their driving skills in here makes me genuinely terrified to be on the road. Those of you still stalling frequently after years of driving- get an automatic or get off the road. I despair at people thinking it's ok to be on the road not in control of your vehicle!