To think the UK is just a bit crap?

[moussakka]

Right don't get me wrong - I love being British and am super proud of being British. But having moved back recently, I just can't escape the feeling that everything's a bit... I don't know, nothing TERRIBLE, just a bit... well, crap? I don't know what it is exactly, but there's just a certain grimmness that I just can't put my finger on. Am I imagining it? Is it just re-entry shock?

I had a strop which lasted about 2 years actually I'm still furious about it, after having to come back from the US. Everything is bigger and better there in the bit I was in and most things here seemed grey and awful and everyone seemed miserable and shit.

But now they're getting Trump, so...

I've lived in New Zealand (for 3 years) then Vancouver (1 year) and do know what you mean as we're now back in the same part of SW London that I've been in since 1999. I do love being back but miss being overseas as well, and the excitement of even the smallest things being different. So it's a tricky compromise we now live in, in our heads. I'll move overseas again one day, maybe for good, but not because I don't like it here, but because I loved the thrill of having to find my feet somewhere new and unfamiliar (not at all how I'd have viewed myself just a few years ago)....

I disagree completely with the initial op. I lived in Australia for a while and found it utterly lacking in personality and soul. It was surreal, I would be looking at a glorious view in glorious sunshine, and id have preferred to have been sat in the rain in the uk.

I think this thread is just titled wrong and maybe should be in the living overseas bit despite being about here as its more abut how you feel returning home rather than a UK bashing.

Seriously disappoint more people haven't mentioned Pinms

Pimms! Bastard fat thumb!

If you think it's shit now, wait a few years... It's about to get a lot shitter! The Tories are making sure of that!

It's a good idea for everyone to live in a different country for a while if they can. All the people desperate to leave the UK should try it!

Oh I did... And I'm not coming back :-)

I want to move to yorkshire everyone is this thread who's happy lives in yorkshire.

Pmsl at a poster who thinks there isn't an alcohol problem in the UK.
I'm Irish and apparently we're problem drinkers! My eyes have been opened by every city I've visited in the UK. Dublin is tame in comparison..

Really? People leave their houses unlocked in nz and keys in the car.

Gah ! (For the record, people don't. We live in NZ, my husband has a colleague who had their car stolen from outside their house. The vehicle was recovered with minor damage but the police could not find any evidence to identify the suspects so that was it. End of story.)

I live in NZ and I'm counting the minutes until it's time to go home to Britain later this year. I just can't take much more of what passes for life here.

*I grew up in London. Have lived in NZ for over a decade. Would like to return to the UK, but it just isn't practical. I have been back a number of times to see family.

These are the good things about the UK compared to where I am.

1. Cheaper and better choice of food and drink.
2. Cheaper and better choice and quality of manufactured products.
3. Cheap holidays abroad to a variety of interesting places.
4. Cultural mix.
5. No earthquakes.
6. Low crime.
7. Vibrant arts scene.
8. Very generous social security provision (genuinely no sarcasm here).
9. Generous health provision.

10. Kind people (if reserved). 11. Lots of social activities, not just sport. 12. Public transport. 13. History and traditions. 14. Gentle summers. 15. Beer. 16. Handsome architecture, both old and new. 17. Queing. 18. Humour. 19. Civility. 20. Intellectualism. 21. Proximity to Europe. 22. Specialisation in industry and professions.

I could easily continue. Did think the Boaty McBoatface thing was a bit daft though, and even dafter that it's considered some kind of strike for the common person.*

Yup, I agree with the above. I was born and raised in South East England. I've lived in NZ for over five years and frankly, I've had enough. I'd had enough some time ago but circumstances dictate that I just had to keep biding my time, treading water, waiting patiently.

I won't be sorry to leave. Sure Britain is no picnic but it's got to better than how were, 'living' now.

I have recently moved back to the UK after living in Canada for 7 years. I can see where you are coming from. My first reaction as we drove through the UK was that it looked very run down and uncared for. The people were certainly more entitled than I remember. Then we arrived at my hometown of Cilgerrin in West Wales and all my dreams came at once. Stunning scenery, friendly people, clean environment and large open spaces for my dogs to run. The grass isn't always greener on the other side. I'm home and home to stay

What those Kiwi expatriates said to the earlier poster is correct.

NZ used to be a low-crime country but it hasn't been now for a very long time. Older police officers will tell you that there are whole categories of crime scenes they no longer attend because they haven't got the resources. Burglary rates are high, and if you get burgled, tough luck: the chances are that the police will do nothing. There are large parts of Auckland that are now genuinely tough places to live. There is a degree of organised crime, but what hits the news most often is the almost random violence, normally as part of what would otherwise be petty crime.

Plus I suspect that rates of child abuse, domestic violence, and male on female violence in NZ were always quite bad but no one really cared.

Auckland generally is a frightful place to live unless you don't mind spending two hours each day in a traffic in a low paid job that barely covers your mortgage which would be gigantic even by London standards, and don't mind living in a house made of something one step up from cardboard. Or unless you are extremely rich. If you lose your job and can't pay the rent, find a friend's couch if you can, or a garage, because the local authority won't house you.

The education system used to be good, but after the sabotage committed by the current and previous governments it isn't any longer.

Apologies to any Kiwis reading this. There are many, many worse places in the world than NZ. But compared to the UK it is certainly no pavlova paradise.

Having lived abroad for almost 10 yrs and moving around in three different Western European countries, it was difficult to readjust. But then it was every time I moved. It took me 6-9 months to stop being homesick from the last place and by 2 years of being anywhere, I was itching to move on to find the fresh and exciting. It took me a long time to settle and accept I was probably back for good and I felt a complete stranger in my country and no one understood me. I had a non distinct accent as well so I didn't really even sound English anymore. I came back to a place where we had lived for only 5 months before moving on. I also came back 7 months pregnant so it was quite a time. Still 8 yrs later I do and I don't fit in. Dh felt the same. He's French anyway. We had a very privileged expat lifestyle, living in marble/limestone floored houses, multiple ensuites and really didn't have to think about money. But I also socialised with people for example living 2 to a studio flat in the centre of Paris so a fair amount of culture mixing. Going back to a much smaller house, which we bought was a bit of a shocker. Silly us we didn't save our money. We also lived in a very privileged area just outside Stuttgart - where they make Mercedes and Porche. So the young kids drive round in old mercs and bmws. I was really destabilised recently with all the Brussels bombing activity because that was the last place we lived and I'd always thought of it as really safe. I knew Paris wasn't safe so no shocker there. But my rose tinted glasses vis a vis Brussels have completely come off. Yanbu to feel destabilised and I get the rant. You'll get through this.

I haven't lived in the UK for 17 years. Its easy to sneer when you are choosing to live places where you have a tailor made package to suit your exact needs. I have been in the ME for the last 8 years because my career is in oil and gas and it makes sense. We have a great life , amazing medical cover, house with a pool etc etc. Its so easy to look back at home and think it's tame but, and this is the thing, I have been in some situations where I haven't had the freedom as a woman to choose my actions. And as soon as that happens, I'm like, oh well I will just go home then. Because the UK is many things but what it is mainly is FREE. Never underestimate the glory of that. But I do think the NHS needs help and I think British people are so busy defending it that people are suffering and I personally wouldn't go back without the means to pay for healthcare. But lucky old me to have the choice. I love England and all its beauty and strength.

The U.K. Is ok in parts, some really lovely bits and the proximity to Europe is a real advantage. But the weather is truly crap, the grey skies and endless bloody rain, and the fact that you aren't even guaranteed a proper summer really used to get to me. I'm a sun bunny, so much happier since I moved to Oz.. The only thing I miss is the pubs, decent newspaper and M&s.

I have lived overseas for about 10 years now. We always come home every year on holidays and I get very excited about things like National Trust places, supermarkets and Primark! It's also so nice to go into a nice pub and have lunch. We have a great time every year but am happy to leave again.

What I am always surprised about is how expensive everything is. I'm a teacher in an International School and can afford a nice standard of living here in SE Asia. We can travel, come home each year and save too. If I was teaching in the UK again our salaries would be eaten up by childcare. We probably wouldn't be able to travel much. Hotels, trains and days out are very expensive in the UK even when you get deals online.

By the same token though, I would love it if MN people could be less fast to slay off our home coo tries. That hurts too. I have been in Qatar on and off for 14 years and watched it change and strive to modernise. Its got some wonderful things about it, not least it's respect for other cultures (Christmas trees in shops etc) and desire to educate all girls and have a 50% female decision maker government by 2030. Please don't make judgements and quote the Guardian at me, I don't slay off the bits of the UK that are less than perfect because every place on earth has them. Thanks for listening.

You didn't grow up in the UK in the 60s and 70s then. Now that was grim.
The older I get the more I love this country. If your intention was to enrage old farts like me then you succeeded. The point is that most of us have a choice about where we live ( yes we do). If you don't like it here then please leave. I mean that most kindly

Betsy, but what you say is true. Munich is rich, but in some ways, that wealth is at the expense of poorer parts of Germany, in the former eastern bloc for example, it is built in migrant labour and the society is more divided than here, and Germany is also hammering Greece in the EU.
There are massive problems in Britain, yes, and it rains a lot, but most people are actually doing their best. We have so much more liberties and the concept of liberty is longer ingrained. That is not to be taken for granted, I would not swap it for all the riches in the world.

I'm living overseas and have no desire to go back to the UK yet, although we will no doubt have to at some point. There are lots of lovely things about the UK that I miss.

But, the thing which really worries me, mostly from reading MN threads, is the state of the health and education systems.

People in Britain now are almost scared to 'bother' their doctors with things and they put up with illness to a much greater extent before it gets treated. (Sweeping generalisation, I know). But it does worry me and I don't think I would go back to the UK without private health insurance now. I see women on here literally fighting to get their kids seen, when here they would have been seen by a specialist and on the operating table within a week. I've recently been diagnosed with hypothyroidism, and I'm pretty sure it wouldn't have been picked up in the UK for at least another year or so, because my blood tests picked it up in the very early stages that would probably not have 'counted' for treatment in the UK.

I see GPs are overstretched and scared to spend money except on patients that are desperately in need and I think that has subconsciously filtered through to normal culture (it's frowned upon in the UK to 'bother' the health service now I think).

I feel the same about the schooling system - I am actually thinking we need to have enough money to send the kids to private schools now if we go back, which I never thought before. Of course, that's exactly what Cameron wants....

I don't feel great about the future of the U.K. any more. I think the loss of quality education and healthcare is going to have repercussions for at least another generation or two and by the time my kids have grown up.

Me too Feesh. I have been feeling a bit crap so popped into my endocrinologist this morning on my way to the vets. No appointment or drama and blood test straight away.

I think it's the adjustment period of moving back. Everything seemed crap when I returned late last year after living in the states - cold and rainy, dirty, the people seemed miserable, having to re-engage with British politics and TV was depressing - now the spring has arrived so we can get out and about and we're more settled I am starting to love it again. And it's amazing being somewhere where people understand sarcasm! Hadn't realised how much I'd had to adjust my natural British cynicism in the US ;)

I can honestly say I left my doors unlocked in Perth, but then I do it in Birmingham too and nothing's ever happen

There's another thread in AIBU started by an OP who had water thrown at her whilst running, in the uk. The responses paint a pretty awful picture of the U.K. People being spat at, verbally abused, yoghurts being thrown at them....awful.