Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

To ask which are worse, toddlers or teenagers?

57 replies

WalkingZed · 27/04/2016 20:20

I've no experience of teenagers, just a 1 and a 3 year old.

My 3 year old was a v v difficult toddler and at 3 is still hard going.

I'd just like to know if people feel there is a connection between a difficult toddler and a difficult teenager?!

Which would you say is worse?

Thanks

OP posts:

froggyjump · 27/04/2016 20:54

like Hassled I had both at the same time. Everything was 'not fair!!' for a long time, but things are getting better now

AdjustableWench · 27/04/2016 21:00

I like both toddlers and teens, but I don't think there's any way to predict whether a difficult toddler will be a difficult teen.

I get more sleep and wine now that mine are older. I do think it makes things a bit easier.

DixieNormas · 27/04/2016 21:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pearlylum · 27/04/2016 21:05

I didn't find either particularly difficult.

If I had to choose I'd say the teen years are easier.

ArabellaRockerfella · 27/04/2016 21:10

Aaargh! I hate being the mother of teens! Give me a toddler any day. I really miss my little ones

bigbuttons · 27/04/2016 21:12

I have 6: 17, 16, 14, 12( going on 15) and 10 and 9. I would say it really depends on personality. My current issues are primarily with 14 yr old dad who is a nightmare a lot of the time. Dd12 is highly anxious and actually has toddler tantrums: drumming heels on the floor and wailing when it all gets too much. So far my 2 oldest boys have been the easiest.
At least with toddlers you can put them to bed. I really miss my evenings.

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 27/04/2016 21:13

"You wait for 2 years for them to walk and talk, then you spend the rest of your life telling them to sit down and shut up"

My eldest is almost 15, my youngest is almost 2, plus there are another 5 children in between.
I honestly can't tell you which age is easier, they have all gone through phases of being very easy and pleasant and being little shits very difficult.

One of them was angelic when very little, but once the terrible twos kicked in there was no turning back. It's a personality thing I figure, wanting to control everything and everyone, which causes a lot of problems.

I don't think you can predict anything, people constanly change and it doesn't stop with the teenage years anyway. Some awful teens turn out to be great adults.
Some are nice but never really grow up.
There are no rules IMO

Cutecat78 · 27/04/2016 21:15

They are all arseholes.

bigbuttons · 27/04/2016 21:15

14 year old dd not dad! Bloody auto correct.

DramaAlpaca · 27/04/2016 21:17

I found toddlers much worse I'm looking at you, DS1 but I really enjoyed having teenagers.

dizzytomato · 27/04/2016 21:19

I have a 3 year old and a 13 year old. Put it this way, my house looks like a bomb hit it following a tantrum yesterday. Someone put their ketchup hands on a newly painted wall, knocked the top off the cistern (which cracked) and used his toothbrush to clean the shower with toothpaste. My 13 year old is a dream, he hugged me the other day and sorted out his baby brother because I was at the end of my rope.

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 27/04/2016 21:20

bigbuttons

Phew. I was wondering!

dizzytomato · 27/04/2016 21:22

But my 13 year old was a dream toddler. My DD is 10, she was a nightmare toddler, got thrown out of John Lewis shoe department. Now she too is a dream. Rarely do we come to blows. My 13 year old went through a nasty stage from 7-10 where he was a nightmare. I think it comes in waves.

bigboypants · 27/04/2016 21:23

I don't have any teens, eldest dc is 6 but my toddler pooed all down the stairs today. All down them. I noticed when we were on the third from the bottom. I really hope I'm not still dealing with things like this in 10 years time.

Kim82 · 27/04/2016 21:26

Toddlers! I have an almost 15 year old and an almost 2 year old (with two others in between) and I can hand on heart say the toddler is much more hard work.

A typical day with the toddler is wanting food but not wanting to eat what I've made, wants a drink but not in that cup, wants me to read a book to her then throws it across the room halfway through, gets tired but cries when you say it's nap time, takes a sip of her drink (when I eventually get the right cup) then squirts it out of her mouth like a fountain, wants to go to the park but doesn't want to put her shoes on, will only eat cocktail sausages and cat biscuits, needs 15,000 dummies within her immediate reach, pokes the cats in the eye, unfolds and stamps on all the washing I have spent 10 minutes folding, screams blue murder if I try to brush her teeth, asks for her nappy to be changed but then refuses to lie down so I can change it, throws toys around the room but doesn't play with a single one and she demands "The Little Princess" on a constant loop on the tv. Her one saving grace is that she gives amazing cuddles snuggled up under a blanket.

The 15 year old needs an endless supply of bagels and access to the Internet. Give me teenagers any day!

Ragwort · 27/04/2016 21:28

I had a dream baby and toddler - now he is 15 I am making up for all those years when I was so smug - .

Surely it totally depends on the personality of the child.

One of the things I miss is my evenings, I could put DS to bed at 7pm from the day we came back from hospital and I knew my evening was my own - I find life with a teenager much more stressful. However I know plenty of parents who were completely sleep deprived for many years.

danadas · 27/04/2016 21:35

Teens are really, really hard work. I find all three of mine a doddle at newborn and toddler stage in comparison.

jaykay34 · 27/04/2016 21:37

I have two teenage children, and a toddler !

My naughty teen was actually the most delightful little girl - definitely the easiest toddler of my three children. My easy going teen was a really difficult and highly strung little boy - but changed when he started school full time. Over the years it's like they have both swapped personalities !

On paper, my toddler and my naughty teen are very similar. They both have tantrums, and scream and cry. They are selfish and messy. They are unpredictable and demand my attention constantly.

However my teen cannot be distracted with Mr Tumble and a box of raisins. She swears, she disappears for hours, she brings constant drama home and causes family arguments. She can be lovely - but the bad moments can really be all consuming. Sometimes she looks at me as if she hates me - and I know in that moment she does.

I generally find myself worrying incessantly about both my teens. I worry about where they are, who they're with, what decisions they'll make. I hate the lack of control you have when they find they their freedom. At least with my toddler, I know exactly where he is and that if he's not with me, he's with people who care about him.

I definitely find the teen years harder !

Topseyt · 27/04/2016 22:16

My "children", if I can still call them that, are almost 21, 17 and 13. All girls.

So I have experience of all stages. Toddlers can be very beguiling, though hard work, whiny and clingy, with some prone to tantrums etc.

Teenagers often don't want to know their parents whilst in the fog of puberty, can be sulky and stroppy know-it-alls etc. but most are becoming human again as they near 17ish.

Both stages have their advantages and disadvantages. A teenager CAN communicate well if it suits them. A toddler finds that much harder and more frustrating.

If I had to choose I would say that the prefer the later teenage years, when they cease to be an alien species and revert to being human.

Topseyt · 27/04/2016 22:18

that I* prefer. Stupid phone.

NickiFury · 27/04/2016 22:38

I've found this age 9 and 13 the hardest yet. Babies were easy compared to this.

Cutecat78 · 27/04/2016 22:43

18 is THE worst age.

pearlylum · 27/04/2016 22:48

18 is the best age so far!

RJnomore1 · 27/04/2016 22:54

Teenagers.

Toddlers are cute. By the time they're teenagers they're back to behaving like toddlers but they're huge and smelly. Plus they no longer let you take them to the cheap Saturday cinema to see all the films you want to see yourself.

hookiewookie29 · 27/04/2016 22:55

Teenagers!
When they're toddlers, you know exactly where they are and what they're doing....what they're eating and drinking.....how much sleep they have etc
Teens are the complete opposite. Dd is 13 goes out with friends, says she's done homework, wears make up.......much preferred it when she was 3!
When I told my Mum I was pregnant with DS ( who was and is a dream) nearly 18 years ago, she said " That's your worry for the rest of your life. No matter how old they are, you never stop worrying about them"
And she's right. I worry about DS going out into town at night, or being a passenger in a friends car. I worry about DD hanging around the park or walking home alone. There are always problems.....they just change as they grow older.

Flip

1 2 3

Swipe left for the next trending thread