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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think that having a newborn is a doddle...

86 replies

WordGetsAround · 23/04/2016 17:09

...compared to the first trimester of pregnancy?

I'm having my best first trimester so far (DC3) and yet I still feel absolutely shocking. I keep thinking, well soon I'll have a whole new human to look after as well but having a newborn is much easier then this, isn't it?

OP posts:
EllenDegenerate · 23/04/2016 18:06

(Hugs Bigfam in solidarity)

AStreetcarNamedBob · 23/04/2016 18:07

YES! DC3 is now 3 weeks old

It's so much nicer than pregnancy.

joanneg36 · 23/04/2016 18:08

Totally depends of course but true for me. Ds1 was neither very easy nor very hard and DS2 was easy but I would take either set of newborn days over my first trimesters which were vile, the second one especially so as I'd just lost a parent too.

Bigfam · 23/04/2016 18:09

EllenDegenerate Grin thanks, very much needed that

corythatwas · 23/04/2016 18:09

Everybody's experience is so different, isn't it? I was going on walking holidays in the first trimester; don't remember it messing with my body in any way. Never felt sick at all. The early months with a failure to thrive baby were pretty tough, though.

WhoisLucasHood · 23/04/2016 18:14

I found the toddler age harder than both, pregnancy was easy bar the last few months of feeling like a whale and the bladder compression. Newborn stage whilst tiring was fairly easy but having a walking talking toddler who questions EVERYTHING is so draining and takes so long to do anything.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 23/04/2016 18:16

Dc3 was a doddle! For 10 whole months, I walked on air. Smile

Dc1 was awful. I hated having a baby. I was lonely, sore, sad, upset. Sad

So I'd say - it depends.

MetalMidget · 23/04/2016 18:21

Oh god, I hope so - my first trimester was pretty easy, so if having a newborn is easier, I'm expecting them to come out sleeping a solid 9 hours overnight, and possibly able to talk to avoid all those awkward communication issues!

lastnightiwenttomanderley · 23/04/2016 18:22

Hmmm...pregnancy was great for me, until I had multiple organ failure at 37 weeks and DS was induced then discovered full dystocia then C section. So first fortnight was hairy but then he was a fab baby, it was all me with the ishoos. Slept through from 6 weeks, loved him.

Then he hit three months....oh dear god! Wanted to be entertained but unable to do it himself. Wanted to move, but couldn't do it. Grumpy, non sleeping baby. We're now at 7 months and still waiting for the sleep thing to get better. I long for the snuggly newborn.

I think there is always someone better off than you - to give you hope. And someone worse off to make you realise you're actually ok. Everyone gets a bit of each at some point, problem is you don't know when!

29redshoes · 23/04/2016 18:26

Ooh, I'm 38 weeks with DC1 and very encouraged by some of these responses! My first trimester was truly awful, although I've been much better since about 15/16 weeks.

thenewaveragebear1983 · 23/04/2016 18:34

Haha op, yes there were times when I was pregnant with number 3, when I felt like my pelvis was bending under the enormous weight of my gigantic diabetes baby, lugging an almost 3 year old around and up stairs, when I did aually feel like I was going to give birth to a toddler. Nope, just a regular 9lb baby.
I will add that it seems I've been lucky with my newborns, and I have a lot of sympathy for people for whom its not so easy. My pregnancies were miserable though.

Stillwishihadabs · 23/04/2016 18:47

For me the first trimester of the first pregnancy was the worst, the newborn phase of number 2 the easiest. But both mine came out able to sleep for 2-3 hours at a go and I had relatively straightforward births ( walked to the GPs for the baby check on day 1 with dd and was able to do yoga at 2 weeks with both). I know this is not the case for everyone.

Amummyatlast · 23/04/2016 18:54

Hell, no. Pregnancy was easy. And the first few months with my velcro baby was tough.

icklekid · 23/04/2016 18:57

No not until ds was 3 months was I even vaguely enjoying it. Horrible colicky newborn who was very fussy. No sleep and pnd. Didn't have a easy pregnancy first time and hypermesis this time however I'm still dreading the first few newborn months!

tilliebob · 23/04/2016 18:59

I found all 3 of mine as newborns easy and largely boring.

Then came the toddler years

And the primary school years

And now we're veterans of the teen years

Sit back and relax now OP because the storms are a-coming

ALongTimeComing · 23/04/2016 19:00

Yes you are correct. Enjoyed newborn stage much much much more! Would do that again in a heartbeat, pregnancy no way!

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 23/04/2016 19:01

I didn't like the new born stage. If I'd have had my way DD would have been born about 2. I love them that age. You get so much out of them, plus to a certain extent they can tell you what's wrong abd what they want ect. I just found DD boring as a new born.

Schwabischeweihnachtskanne · 23/04/2016 19:01

Obviously YABU if you are trying to claim that is always true - and YANBU if you are talking about your own experience.

I've had quite different pregnancies with my 3 - with DC1 I had absolutely horrendous all day sickness and was exhausted, had to take time off work because I had to stop the car to vomit several times on the drive there and had to leave classes unattended to run out and vomit, but with DC2 I was fine and managed to pack up an entire 3 bed house alone for an international move whilst on my own with a one year old toddler and working full time as a childminder to two other toddlers, working out the notice I owed my families (my DH had gone on ahead to start a new job abroad).

With DC3 I forgot I was pregnant sometimes despite having a toddler and a 4 year old at the start of the pregnancy, and the pregnancy barely had any impact until my hips got dodgy in the last couple of months.

One of my kids was a breeze as a baby, but DC1 and 3 were non sleepers as newborns and definitely not easier than being pregnant.

The hardest part IME was when you still have an absolute sleep refuser in combination with an early rising toddler and a school child with a fixed routine meaning you cannot just stay in your pyjamas and put a DVD when the baby finally dozes off at 7am after being awake most of the night/ waking hourly all night, after the newborn phase, and nobody makes any allowances for you and you are expected to be coping and taking everything in your stride, and its apparently a sign of your crappness as a parent if you admit to owning a non sleeper...

ScrambledSmegs · 23/04/2016 19:01

NO. I had constant nausea and vomiting in pregnancy with DC2 up to about 24 weeks. I also had such terrible heartburn in early pregnancy with DC1 (till 16 weeks) that I couldn't even drink - ended up on medication.

DC1 had silent reflux, DC2 had constant ear infections (glue ear). Newborn stage was shit for us.

ALongTimeComing · 23/04/2016 19:02

Actually I lie. My DC was in SCBU for the first week so...the bit from about 2 weeks onwards I would do again.

Ameliablue · 23/04/2016 19:03

Obviously everyone is different but absolutely a newborn was easier than several weeks of doing nothing but vomiting.

Xmasbaby11 · 23/04/2016 19:05

Dd1 was ok first trimester. Dd2 was much harder. Being pregnant with a toddler was nowhere near as hard as having a toddler plus newborn! Newborn actually had needs during the day and was up multiple times in the night. I was working full time while pregnant and felt largely fine.

WeAllHaveWings · 23/04/2016 19:08

I was lucky with first trimester. Not a hint of sickness, but utterly exhausted and in bed before 8pm most nights for weeks.

Newborn was much harder with lack of sleep and trying to establish bf'ing

kungfupannda · 23/04/2016 19:09

YANBU

DS3 is 3 weeks old and I'm getting more sleep than when I was pregnant. He wakes to feed twice a night. I was getting up to wee at least 10 times a night!

Sunshine87 · 23/04/2016 19:15

My newborn will sleep for 10 till 5-5.30 he is less than three weeks old however he will constantly feed every 2hours during the day and evening. We lay him down a lot to sleep in his pram during the day. It's much easier than being pregnant. My third pregnancy I had severe psd I couldn't even do the school run, tidy the house, struggled in the bath and going up the stairs. I feel amazing now house is spotless. Got more energy and no pain whatsoever can do stuff with my other kids baking going to the park etc.