Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think if you are constantly posting on FB how fabulous your DP / DH is and

48 replies

SeptemberFlowers · 19/04/2016 11:43

That there is an element of "The empty barrel rings the loudest ?" Hmm

My fb newsfeed is full today especially of "Thank you

OP posts:
Yeahsure · 19/04/2016 11:45

Well this is a new topic! No-one's posted about this before Wink Grin.

UmbongoUnchained · 19/04/2016 11:46

Because they want people to feel jealous maybe? I don't know.

I'm the kind of social media user that most people on mumsnet hate. I take selfies with my daughter and my husband. I take photos of things I find interesting and put them on there. I also share about my day and vent when I need to.
If husband had done something nice then I think it's nice to share it. I like seeing my friends happy and in sure they like seeing me happy too.

judgelionelnutmeg · 19/04/2016 11:46

Deep rooted insecurity if you ask me.

EatShitDerek · 19/04/2016 11:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 19/04/2016 11:51

I always think that these things are being usually being posted for somebody else's benefit.

For example, a prime example amongst my FB friends is the woman whose DP had been cheating posting loving, emotional posts knowing full well that the OW would see them. It was almost a way of stating ownership.

And yes, over the years, the most OTT couples on FB do seem to have been the ones to separate. Or at least have problems.

WorraLiberty · 19/04/2016 11:51

These threads make me think the 'deep rooted insecurity' (if indeed there is any at all), definitely works both ways.

The people who moan about this sort of thing, instead of hiding annoying posts or deleting their FB account, are often probably just as insecure as those who post a status update every time their DH makes a cup of tea.

Roll your eyes and scroll past if it annoys you this much.

SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 19/04/2016 11:51

Sorry - an extra "being" there in the first line!

SeptemberFlowers · 19/04/2016 11:52

Yeahsure Really has it ? Oops Blush

I must come out of my cave a lot more !

OP posts:
dimots · 19/04/2016 11:57

I'm not as cynical. I have a facebook friend who does this, but I know she has had a really bad time over the past few years and don't think her ex husband was very supportive (she never posted about him, good or bad). She now has a new husband and is obviously thrilled with him, so I think she is just genuinely enthusiastic.

Fishcake72 · 19/04/2016 11:57

My SIL is so bad for this. Always makes me wonder what really goes on..

NeedACleverNN · 19/04/2016 11:59

I do it occasionally.
Very rarely but it's usually aimed towards my family.

They are not keen on my dh and this is my way of saying get over yourself. He really isn't that bad! It's the only way I can do it without it looking like I'm calling them out.

MaryMaryQuiteContrary79 · 19/04/2016 12:01

Posting about loved ones is one thing and my motto is 'to each their own'....what gets to me is those' inspirational quotes'....how very deep indeed...winds me up and then I have to remind myself 'each their own dear'.....my new motto 'WHATEVERRRRR'

FATEdestiny · 19/04/2016 12:09

Someone on my FB feed was doing this. Until about a month ago...

  • Constant made for each other, DH is amazing, our marriage is so strong, type posts
  • literally the next day after such posts, suddenly fb name changes to her maiden name. Silence for a few days.
  • then requests for local rented properties because she's moving out with DC
  • then strong women don't need a man, glad to be single kind of posts.

This has all happened in the space of a week. Was bizarre to watch, although I do feel sorry for her. Clearly she was either bullshitting then, or she's bullshitting now. Or both.

Deeply insecure for sure. Although this woman likes to give the FB impression she is confident, well balanced with bags of self esteem. Probably an act. Sadly.

toomuchtooold · 19/04/2016 12:21

I'm inclined to agree with this, not least because DH and I communicate n Facebook solely through sarcastic comments on each other's posts Grin

It's the same with people who go on about how much of a blessing it is to be a mother. I always think they're posting it at about 4.15pm, glass of gin in hand, counting the minutes till bedtime.

arethereanyleftatall · 19/04/2016 12:24

As far as I can tell, fb is inversely proportional to real life.
The better your life/relationship seems, the worse it actually is.

gingerbreadmanm · 19/04/2016 12:26

Oh gosh my bf does this in real life, on texts, in person. It's a defence mechanism i'm sure.

I'm the opposite (my poor dp) but i would rather be that way than have rose tinted glasses on.

An example was her asking dp to come for drinks with a group of us last minute. He told her she can go and he will do something else. She went home. The update the next day all bright and breezy oh i havent had any good quality time with dp this week i needed to see my man. You live together ffs!

oldlaundbooth · 19/04/2016 13:40

Insecurity. Gets my goat too.

Katedotness1963 · 19/04/2016 13:44

I used to belong to a mums group online. Some of the women would post lengthy tirades about what utter bastards their husbands were and how they were going to leave the fuckers as soon as they could. Then they would post on FB about how wonderful the husband was and how they were the light of their lives.

Since then I've always assumed those lovey-dovey FB posts are a load of shite.

MissPunnyMany · 19/04/2016 13:56

Three of the four women I know who do this have unhappy / frequently problematic marriages. The other is just lovely and I think it's just her way. Myself and DH have a running joke when one of us says something loving to the other of 'yes but could you put it on facebook or I'm not sure I'll believe you'. I don't want my marriage aired to all and sundry, we're very happy, but it's our marriage and I don't communicate with my DH on Facebook!

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 19/04/2016 14:00

Ynbu. I'm not face book so clearly don't nor wouldn't be bragging. I also think it's a case of "Keep telling yourself that.".

lateforeverything · 19/04/2016 14:05

I have a friend who's dh is complete twat who has publically deeply embarrassed her in the past and yet on 14th Feb she wrote "I love being married to you because everyday is like Valentine's Day". Please! 💩

Claraoswald36 · 19/04/2016 14:07

I'm not on Facebook but I recall a recently divorced dear friend posting that kind of shit back along when I was. So you are probably on the money Wink

Uncoping · 19/04/2016 14:15

Huh,
I don't post very often about my OH, but when I do it's because I'm genuinely feeling very happy & loved up and I just like to share it.
No ulterior motive, no agenda, no hidden meaning...
I just like to show appreciation for him every once in a while to my friends and family.

I have a very small FB, not hundred of people on it just connections that matter.

GreenishMe · 19/04/2016 14:19

I have a friend who's dh is complete twat who has publically deeply embarrassed her in the past and yet on 14th Feb she wrote "I love being married to you because everyday is like Valentine's Day". Please! 💩

I know someone like this too. Her DP is a violent, aggressive, controlling waste of oxygen pig and she has a dog's life. Yet she posts really fawning messages about him and how much she loves him and how lucky she is to have him, on FB.

My thoughts are that she does it out of fear - to appease him - in the hope he'll be 'nice' to her for a couple of hours.

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 19/04/2016 14:21

I think people are pretty quick to be cynical about it. I'm not on FB, but everyone I know is. One person posts very lovey-dovey stuff about her DH, and they're very happy in rl, so not, it's not always a pile of crap. Some people really are happy Grin

I've got no problem with people sharing nice, loving stuff. It makes a change from all the hateful shite in the world.

Swipe left for the next trending thread