DH is currently upstairs cocooned in our duvet. I got up with DS at 7.30 (a very reasonable time, no complaints there), and sorted out breakfast, getting dressed etc. He's happily watching Mr Tumble. I can tell you exactly how the next few hours will go, because this has been happening since DS was born. Shortly I will hear a clomping noise upstairs followed by the running of the bath tap. DH will then descend the stairs and head outside for his pre-bath fag. He will smile warmly at our son and head back upstairs for a bath lasting approximately an hour. Then he'll spend half an hour 'getting dressed' (sitting upstairs in his pants reading on his phone) before finally emerging at about 11/11.30 to join family life. How do I know this? It happens pretty much every day, and certainly every weekend.
A bit of background, he's a freelance writer with a sporadic working pattern, I'm a SAHM. He has periods where he's very busy and periods where he has a lot of downtime. He wants me to stay at home with our boy but can be v resentful about being the only breadwinner. We're not poor, we manage. We have a pretty good life, materially.
I would say I do 90% of the childcare. He does read him a story every night though, which he sees as 'putting him to bed' (even though I run the bath, brush his teeth, dry him off, get him in his pjs). He thinks he's doing a great job. He had DS for a bit yesterday while I had my hair done (this happens about 3x a year, at most) and I know he thinks he's done his stint for the week.
But I want more, and I think I deserve it. I'm tired and increasingly resentful. AIBU guys? Is he doing enough?