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AIBU?

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Original poster

Organising own baby shower?

61 replies

Dozyoldtwonk · 12/04/2016 22:24

I've just received an invitation, not at all unlike a wedding invite with its shiny gold envelope & expensive eye roll paper, for a BABY SHOWER. So far, so normal maybe. But the mum-to-be has arranged it all herself, booked a venue, sent the invites (90, no less Hmm) & so on. Am I missing something here, or is this just fucking weird?

I'm not going, BTW, and have told her so just now. I have no problem with baby showers per se & have been to a fair few but I think this one takes the biscuit & screams too grabby. Or am I just being a whingebag killjoy DH thinks so

OP posts:
girlfrommars33 · 13/04/2016 11:05

I don't like baby showers because I don't understand the gift etiquette. I buy a present when the baby is born and I can't afford to buy two presents.

dontaskdonttell · 13/04/2016 11:22

I went to one recently that was organised by the pregnant woman. She had booked a hall, put on some food and had "games". She admitted she only did it for the presents. This was a week ago and no one has received a thank you for the presents they took. Not many people came and she's having another one (again organised herself) in her home town.

I don't mind baby showers but I don't like someone organising it themselves and admitting it's for the presents, then not even saying thank you! I'd much rather have some friends round, 5-6 people, eat some cake and chat. No gifts, just a chance to catch up and have a giggle before baby arrives!

Crazypetlady · 13/04/2016 11:26

Incredibly grabby. My sil was arranging her own baby shower but stated she didnt want any presents.

Jackie0 · 13/04/2016 11:40

Really poor form IMO.
Baby showers are tacky and grabby anyway but it's a complete faux pas to organise your own !

expatinscotland · 13/04/2016 12:21

It's not 'American' to host your own shower, to throw a party and then call it a shower but for couples, at night, no gifts - that's not a shower, to have a shower for anything except a first child. What it is is an afternoon gathering of women, organised by someone other than the mum-to-be or her close family, with gifts for the baby and sometimes the mum to be (stuff like stretchmark cream). It's a tradition that's been bastardised here and then pilloried as grabby and tacky.

SenecaFalls · 13/04/2016 13:08

I underscore what expat said. We have wedding showers in the States, too. Have those caught on at all in the UK?

LordoftheTits · 13/04/2016 13:32

We have wedding showers in the States, too. Have those caught on at all in the UK?

I've never been to one or heard of anyone having one so hopefully not!

I went to my first baby shower recently and it was nice to chat and meet new people but on the whole I find them very grabby.

LoisWilkersonsLastNerve · 13/04/2016 13:34

a tradition that's been bastardised here and then pilloried as grabby and tacky

Yes its my understanding that traditionally it was a chance for friends and family to help a first time mum get started with her layette. And eat cake Smile

purplevase · 13/04/2016 14:43

I didn't have a baby shower because nobody organised one for me. I don't see a problem with organising your own! Except that it seems a bit previous. How about waiting to make sure baby arrives safely and mum is well, before celebrating?

Elle80 · 13/04/2016 14:54

YADNBU. I detest baby showers, and that one just sounds plain weird

whifflesqueak · 13/04/2016 15:20

I didn't want a baby shower, but my best friend "arranged" one for me.

by that, I mean she informed me of when she and our friends would be arriving at my house.

so in a sense I threw my own baby shower.

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