First post from a long time lurker!
Basically, I currently live about 300 miles from my parents, with my DH and 2yo DD. I'm looking at relocating and renting in an area that is about half an hour from where my parents & Dh's mother live. They have always wanted us to move closer, so they can see their granddaughter more often etc.
DH and I are broke, so in order to move we will be relying on financial help, probably to the tune of about 1.5k from my parents. Not sure if it's relevant, but they are relatively wealthy. Very grateful for said help, but they are really only prepared to help if they can be in control of where we live, how we move and what we do in the mean time. They aren't big fans of the area we want to live in (they are snobs), and are very picky about exactly where we should live. They have also mentioned giving us £100 a month so we can afford to rent somewhere nicer. Again, very kind, but I'm worried that they are going to use this as leverage over me. They have really history of being emotionally abusive towards me, and are prone to bullying me. Our relationship has always been very difficult, but we are also quite close. I want to go down on the train to visit the area, and my parents are busy, so I suggested I go and stay with my MIL so I can have a look around. My DF shouted 'Why don't you going and live with fucking MIL then' and put the phone down on me, as he thinks I am being spiteful by suggesting it?! They think she has less right to spend time with DD because she has offered less financial help.
I'm starting to have real reservations about this whole thing, but we 're really unhappy where we are, and I really wanted to be nearer family for support, and for DD to have more time with grandparents, instead of barely knowing them. I struggle massively with my MH, and thought I'd be better off surrounded by family, as i'm lonely here. Am I being ungrateful? I'm really angry at my Dad, but don't feel like I'm allowed to be because of the money sitch. I'd really appreciate some insight!