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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think DP is a filthy bastard!

53 replies

Chasethechaser · 11/04/2016 12:18

We have a separate shower room from the bathroom.

I never shower, morning bath instead. DC bath. DP is the only one who uses the shower. To be fair to him he does a manual job and comes home minging so the first thing he does is shower when he comes home.

I've just been in the shower room for the first time in about 6 months. Oh my fucking god it is FILTHY. Like properly bloody minging. I think there's stuff growing in the shower. Black mould, hair, pubes Envy

I've just called him to ask WTF and he laughed and said yeah I wouldn't look in the cupboard if I were you. I've just looked and it's full of empty toiletries that he's chucked in there.

I told him he could fuck off if he thinks I'm cleaning it and said meh I don't really mind it Hmm

I'm closing the bloody door and not going back in AIBU?!

OP posts:
SENMumoftwo · 11/04/2016 13:57

This isn't about anyone being reasonable or unreasonable............Can't the person who cleans just do that at the same time. Common sense?!?!?! There's more time being spent NOT doing it.......FFS will somebody just clean it!!

I don't use my kids bedrooms, but I still clean them!!
I don't wear DH's clothes, but I put them in the wash with everything else!!
I don't use all the cups, plates & glasses, but still wash them!!
I don't use a particular loo in the house, but I still bloody clean it!!

Ridiculous post

Original poster
Chasethechaser · 11/04/2016 13:58

No window. It's built into the side of the utility, just checked the extraction fan which doesn't look like he's even put it on the amount of dust on it.

I've sprayed it down with some stuff, he can scrub it when he gets home, put a lightbulb in there too

OP posts:
Original poster
Chasethechaser · 11/04/2016 13:59

SENmum, you should stop doing everything for everyone Wink

OP posts:
MargotLovedTom · 11/04/2016 14:02

I was wondering about an extractor fan. Ugh, no wonder it's so rank in there.

specialsubject · 11/04/2016 14:12

in a world where billions don't have so much as a toilet, this is a revolting way to behave.

can't even be bothered to dispose of rubbish properly? Sounds like of the spoilt teenager threads on here.

Inertia · 11/04/2016 14:14

Usually the extractor switches on when the light is switched on, so if there's no bulb he probably hasn't bothered.

pictish · 11/04/2016 14:14

SENmum - you're hardly selling it to us.

Pheobe1 · 11/04/2016 14:16

I would have cleaned it. I don't use our bath I only ever shower. I still clean the bath though as part of my general daily housework. I do expect anyone who uses it to give it s rinse and wipe round after use. I go in and deep clean the bathroom every week.
I'm a SAHM though so I think deep cleaning is part of my job role. He is minginh for not giving it a general wipe down after each use though.

SENMumoftwo · 11/04/2016 14:16

I promise you I don't do everything for everyone. Smile

Although, WHY doesn't your DH have basic self care skills? Confused.

MyLocal · 11/04/2016 14:17

In our house DH is like the OP's DH. BUT he would never expect me to clean everything and keep it spick and span, he just comes from a mucky house even though he is immaculate. I, on the other hand, come from an obsessively clean and tidy home and am the same, and it causes me far more pain to let something like this hang around then it does to give it a quick spray and wipe round every day.

So I do it, mad or not, it makes me happier than living with filth

BroughtmyownBag · 11/04/2016 14:18

Get that extract fixed! His showers will be putting moisture into the rest of the house - and the mould will SPREAD....

SENMumoftwo · 11/04/2016 14:19

Pictish, I'm lost. What am I selling? Hmm

EarthboundMisfit · 11/04/2016 14:19

Haha. I have a group of male friends who live together. They are aged between 35 and 45, single, good jobs.
The only rooms with working light bulbs are the lounge and kitchen, and it's been that way for at least three years.

pictish · 11/04/2016 14:26

It's a turn of phrase. When you advocate something strongly, as you did about cleaning the shower room, but make it sound like a bad position to be coming from (I clean everything all the time!!) it can be described as not selling it. Swim?

pictish · 11/04/2016 14:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pictish · 11/04/2016 14:32

Ignore that - wrong thread. Have reported.

RudeElf · 11/04/2016 14:32

Ewwww GRIM! Envy

The room must honk. No extractor fan or window?? (Dont tell pigletjohn)

FredaMayor · 11/04/2016 14:39

Get a professional cleaner out and give DH the bill. I did this with DS and never had any problem from then on.

lorelei9here · 11/04/2016 14:39

OP does he do his share otherwise?

ouryve · 11/04/2016 14:40

I don't know how it works in your house, senmumoftwo, but in our house we both do the cleaning.

Op's dh is a grown man and capable of sorting it out himself. OP shouldn't have to do it just because he's been so lazy. If the mould has been building up over the winter, a few extra hours isn't going to much difference.

lorelei9here · 11/04/2016 14:40

Sorry posted too soon
It baffles me how he can go and get clean in a filthy bathroom. Blech.

Original poster
Chasethechaser · 11/04/2016 14:58

Yes he does his share. I'm a happy SAHM so don't mind doing the lions share, but he does his own washing, cooks more than I do, baths the kids at night etc etc

I asked him how the hell he showers in there, he said well the showers on so it doesn't matter it's not like cooking in a dirty kitchen.

Yes extractor not working because the lights out presumably.

OP posts:
SENMumoftwo · 11/04/2016 15:06

I didn't advocate strongly. I was matter of fact. However, thank you for explaining, as I don't 'get' sayings or phrases.

It's the same here. Which is why I said 'person' as it doesn't matter who does it. I never once said OP should do it. I actually think OP's DH is revolting, but was initially being my version of tactful.

We both do our share, but the things I don't use, I still know what state they get in (or I would have said something much sooner if I didn't think I should clean it up) and it is the same the other way round with DH.

I genuinely thought this was a joke post.

MrsBoDuke · 11/04/2016 15:06

I agree with SENmumoftwo, whoever puts the washing in (including the kids), is 'doing the washing'; washing the dishes is 'washing the dishes' etc.
There's no division of your dishes, your washing, your ironing etc - whoever does it does it all.

HippyPottyMouth · 11/04/2016 15:13

I'm in two minds about this. I never use our en suite as I prefer the shower in the family bathroom, so I don't go in there unless I have a reason to. It's not on my priority list for cleaning as neither DD nor I use it. If I've got a loo brush in my hand and I'm not in a hurry I'll give the loo a quick scrub, but unless I'm on a major cleaning day, I regard it as not my problem. If I'm doing a big clean, I'll do it, but it's on a par with behind the sofa and tops of cupboards in terms of priority.

(We both work, but I work from home some of the time so have a bit more time for cleaning than DH, but I'm not a SAHM or housewife - I don't see cleaning as totally my job.)

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