Catering for vegetarians at a house-warming party, do I need to provide separate food?

[IslandCanary]

Everyone is bringing a dish, so far most of these contain meat/fish (apart from the salad) as we're doing tapas-style.

One couple have just told me they are vegetarian.

Do I need to ask everyone to bring vegetarian dishes instead? Or is it ok to just provide some salad/rice and let them bring a dish they can eat? I don't want them to feel excluded.

I find most vegetarian food bland and unpleasant and would rather have meat/fish dishes to cater for the majority (I'm planning to make spicy chicken wings, someone else is bringing meatballs, another is bringing battered tempura prawns, crispy squid, vegetable risotto etc.

If I need to provide more veggie options does anyone have any ideas?

I'm interested actually in pescetarianism, is someone able to explain it please, I'm not picking a fight. I don't really see how, if you have established an ethical position on not eating meat how fish differs? Is the life of a fish valued as lower then other animals? Is it a transition stage to vegetarianism?

Its interesting.

serves you right for missing out an essential food group or 2 Rufus - you're developing cheese brain - a well know side effect of being a selfish picky eater - why can't you just have a chicken wing ffs

Is it unusual to ask guests to your house what their dietary preferences are and then cater to them?
Me too.

"Would you like to come for tea/BBQ/I'll do a buffet? Is there anything particular you can or can't eat?

OP, if you are having a tapas style buffet, how about having:

olives
patatas bravas and/or alioli
chicken skewers
garlic mushrooms
meatballs
pan con tomate
something cheesy
vegetable paella (eg peppers and artichokes/aubergine) - not traditional but nice

Plenty of selection for everyone.

Interesting Maid ... I think liking a vegetarian dish should be enough of a reason for choosing to eat it (obviously is good to show consideration for others in a buffet type situation)
But if more people are eating more vegetables more often, and less meat, then that's good for their health, and good for the welfare of animals, and good for the planet and people around the world too.
I feel it's misguided to be all "This special vegetarian food is just for me!"
I'm sure the animals don't mind if they get to skip along for another day because someone thought the vegetable/vegetarian dish looked delicious or whether they made that choice from a deep, moral conviction (not to disrespect that choice either).
In any case it can easily be a bit of both?

My cousin, who is pescetarian, just doesn't like the texture of meat - a lot of fish is more 'flakey' whereas most meat is firm. Like my son doesn't like the texture of chocolate and gags when he eats it (I know, I think I found him under a gooseberry bush...mind you, he always passes us the chocolate he gets in goody bags etc so can't complain!)

They do that because they want to socialise and have a good time with their friends

On this thread we're also talking about eating at buffets (on training courses and so on) on planes and in various other situations. So while your assertion that everyone has the same objective when eating out may be true for you, it is not always true in the situations discussed here.

i think its the lack of meat
According to my father, this is why I am short.

Despite the fact that I am slightly taller than average height for a female

the meaty bastards had stuffed themselves with carrot and homus butties, samosas and veggie puffs - I was incandescent with rage and hunger
I know that one, then they comment how tasty vegi food is!!

Sorry, forgot something with chick peas or butter beans as another vegetarian protein option.

I am astonished that all these vegetarians think that if anyone dares to put a sausage roll on a plate at a buffet, that automatically disallows them from touching the egg mayo or cheese sandwiches, onion bhajis, greek salad, crisps etc.

No one thinks that, no one. What pisses us off is when you get to the buffet and there is only meat left because the meat eaters have eaten all the vegi food because it 'looked nice'. Ask any vegetarian, it happens all the time.
I remember being in hospital and the other people on the ward all chose the vegi option because it looked nicer. When they got to me there was no vegi food left. So I got nothing.

Thanks knock

I'm actually eating the most lovely vegan lemon cake that I made this afternoon right now :)

the meaty bastards had stuffed themselves with carrot and humous etc. etc

See as an almost veggie I'd see that as a good thing (as long as I could find something to eat for myself!) as they're slowly but surely coming over from the dark side - and realising how delicious and healthy veggie food can be!

I think what Maid is trying to say Juggling is that if I, as an omnivore, choose a chicken leg AND a piece of vegetarian quiche plus my salads at a buffet or put a ladle of meat AND a vegetarian chilli on my jacket potato, my sister (who is vegetarian) may only be able to eat the salad because I've eaten the vegetarian main dish. I have a choice of both dishes, she only has the one.

So it is good to encourage people to eat vegetarian food - but only if you've catered for the main dishes being primarily vegetarian. If I only have four people to my party who are vegetarian and I only put out enough for, say eight (to allow seconds), then the other 30 people who are meat eaters could well chomp their way through the vegetarian main course just because it's there and they can eat it.

Easiest way round that is to do lots of vegetarian mains. Most meat eaters won't have a problem with going all vegetarian - both my SILs are vegetarian and they only do vegetarian meals when we visit them. I can't say I really notice the difference.

So direct your anger towards the caterers not the people just trying to choose themselves somy food. Do you expect us to stand there and analyse the percentage of vegetarian food and compare it with the exact dietary requirements of all the other people at the buffet?

But if more people are eating more vegetables more often, and less meat, then that's good for their health, and good for the welfare of animals, and good for the planet and people around the world too
I couldn't agree more. Really, I'm so behind this statement, it's untrue.

It's just right now, the general ethos (in this country at least) doesn't match this philosophy. Mumsnet is pretty right on for nutritional balances and exotic cuisines and so forth. But in many circles, buffets are still 1/10th exclusively vegetable dishes for the 1/10th of guests who are vegetarian. And until that changes, I sometimes don't eat, because, on average, people don't eat 10% vegetable matter and 90% meat/fish.

So, I don't feel, right now in the UK, it's misguided to be all "This special vegetarian food is just for me! We might be miles ahead of when I first became vegetarian, but we aren't even at the right nutritional balance for omnivores!

I would note that I am way more relaxed at parties/buffets etc in places where vegetarianism is more common, or even majority

"I'm interested actually in pescetarianism, is someone able to explain it please, I'm not picking a fight. I don't really see how, if you have established an ethical position on not eating meat how fish differs? Is the life of a fish valued as lower then other animals?"

Not a pescetarian, but I imagine it's not a dissimilar position from that of someone who will happily eat cow, for example, but would draw the line at dog.

Do you expect us to stand there and analyse the percentage of vegetarian food and compare it with the exact dietary requirements of all the other people at the buffet?

Yes, that's exactly what people are suggesting on this thread

Trouble is Barbara (love your name!), yes that's fine for professional caterers at a wedding or some sort of do, but what about home entertainers, it's a bit of a headache!

and I'm not going to mention that, as a rule, I can easily forgo buffet in favour of wine

Many years ago when I was a meat eater (vegan now) I would avoid meat at buffets in case I got food poisoning lol so I likely pissed of the vegetarians. I didn't realise back then that rice and coleslaw poison as much than meat!

I can see there is a problem here for vegetarians in some situations Knock, but I agree with some PPs that a big part of the solution is for caterers to provide a larger proportion of veggie dishes for everyone to choose from. A good buffet should be a lovely and delicious sharing opportunity, not an individualistic type of thing?
And when sandwiches are provided at an all day event (eg. a course) I think it's perhaps unrealistic to expect all omnivores to say choose a ham sandwich over a cheese and salad option (of course if it's not an option then that should be made clear)

I don't really see how, if you have established an ethical position on not eating meat how fish differs? Is the life of a fish valued as lower then other animals?
I don't get pescatarianism, although I ate fishfingers for a few years after I cut out meat. It seemed, as you say, a bit of an obvious transition and, admittedly, kept my Mum from worrying about me. But then I realised I had no rationale for it - it was an unthinking decision, so stopped eating fish.

And then read books about the fishing industry. Frankly, I'd rather hear that people were eating cuddled cows.

it was an unthinking decision, so stopped eating fish
I mean - it was an unthinking decision in the first place, to carry on eating fish. I didn't invest much time into analysis of it, unlike I did for meat.

At work buffets etc the caterers are the problem not the non-vegetarians eating the vegetable quiche and vegetable samosas. If caterers assume only vegetarians will eat vegetarian food then vegetarians will always be at risk of going hungry.

Unless specifically instructed, a human being approaching a buffet is looking for the food they will enjoy the most.

A few pages back someone suggested that if you generally prefer the veggie food to do the vegetarians a favour and put vegetarian as your preference. That never occurred to me and is a very sensible suggestion, I'll do that from now on (and cross my fingers not to be arrested if I inadvertantly scoff a sausage roll too!)