AIBU to ask you which businesses are the least Autism friendly?

[LarrytheCucumber]

I nominate NatWest for their new look complete with confusing banks of cash machines and loud music. (Also bad for hearing aid wearers).

I describe myself as being autistic as I don't class it as an add on. It's who I am and an integral part of my being. I wouldn't be me if I wasn't autistic, I would be someone totally different.

People describe themselves in different ways.

Ds can't cope in frankie and bennies, the loud music and dim lights just don't work for him. The noise does seem to echo around them.

During the day he likes weatherspoons and they don't play music.

I despise 'person with autism'. It implies I should be ashamed of being different.

In my experience people without autism, especially parents of autistic people, prefer 'person with autism'. Whereas autistic people themselves prefer to be described as autistic. Personally I think we should decide for ourselves and not have it imposed on us.

I have 2 autistic children. I cannot and wouldn't want to separate them from their autism any more than I could separate myself from being a woman.
I don't object to either way of wording it though.

There have been a few times we have left restaurants because of the volume of the music in favour of somewhere quieter.
Supermarkets were always one of the biggest challenges for my kids.

Oh yes supermarkets. Ds likes tesco but not asda - again I think the music and radio is the problem.

Babba, I have no problem with how you wish to use the terminology. I was just pointing out that some people do.

An autistic man I met at a library forum explained it to me as you wouldn't say someone 'had homosexuality', you'd say they were homosexual or gay. And so he prefers 'autistic' to describe himself.

Slightly off topic, but my DS had a teacher who played music while they were working. DS didn't have a problem with it, but personally I find music quite difficult to filter out and have always needed relative quiet to work. I would have studied in that class.

Aaaargh struggled not studied.

Asda closely followed by Tesco feel as though 'they are sucking the life out of me' to dd.

Listening to any form or presentation is a challenge for her too when it's all verbal, e.g. at the bank being given the options for opening a new bank account.

Blankmind my DD is the same, hopeless at auditory processing. She's not autistic but I am pretty convinced she's on the spectrum somewhere.

Music in shops doesn't bother me much (although still having the music in my head that they played in the shop I did work experience in, some 5 months later bothers me very much!!!!), but I hate when shops are too hot.

Our GPs play music radio deliberately as a way to make absolutely sure people on the waiting room can't hear what's being said in consulting rooms. However it is tricky for a lot of people to handle for a variety of reasons. My DM with early dementia can't disentangle multiple sound streams any more, so can't have a conversation while there's vocal music in the background.

My dd has AS, she always hated Morrisons but could tolerate Waitrose! I still can't figure out the difference? She would often have terrible meltdowns in Morrisons.

thorium oh, absolutely, I can totally understand it must be shit. I just think it's unavoidably so, sadly. Not the same, I know, but I have anorexia and find food smells (and sometimes sights) really hard to cope with. But it would be v unreasonable to ban street food. I guess I see ambient music in the same way.

An on the 'with autism' or ' an autist' debate, it surely depends on whether you see it as a disability or not. If you do, then the homosexuality analogy is obviously inappropriate and you source be more likely to say 'have' autism. But if you see it as who you are and only disabling because of society's attitudes then comparing it to homosexuality works very well.

My ds finds most shops difficult to be in except Sainsburys and toy shops. We tried Five Guys (fast food place) once but had to leave because the music was unbelievably loud. That gets my nomination for being the least autism friendly.

I usually say with autism but am maybe changing my mind now. It is interesting to here other people's opinions.

DS used to hate Marks and Spencer long before he had a diagnosis. I am pretty sure he never sets foot in there now, as a 21 year old male!

The child development centre in my local hospital is not autistic friendly.. Or rather a particular receptionist there who complained about my DS, because the "strange" (admittedly loud) noises he was making was putting her off her work

I feel Thorium can describe herself however she sees fit.

My local hospital - A&E is hell, but even the wards are a nightmare; ridiculously noisy room (4 beds but 2 occupied by ladies with severe dementia who screamed all night), harsh lighting which you had no control over, dreadful food (very sloppy and slimy which I can't eat) combined with total inflexibility - refused private rooms even though available as "they're for people who need them", threatened with a dietician because I wouldn't (couldn't) eat the food. Truly dreadful and absolutely no comprehension of autism.

I hate Asda too, its too loud and too bright! Dd3 always goes into overdrive and wants to run around and skateboard on the trolley!! Its gets insane very quickly!

Aldi is not so bad because its smaller and no music and they clear the queues very quickly!

My GP is not autism friendly at all, I am sure he forgets that Dd3 has autism, he expects her to speak to him and its not going to happen, then he looks at me with a cats bum face when I answer for her! I mean she hasnt spoken to him in 13 yrs but if he wants me to sit there and wait for it to happen, I suppose we could!

I went clothes shopping for the first time in ages last weekend, completely agree with pp about the illogical layouts of clothes and styles. Particularly M&S and Next. I just want jeans! All jeans should be in a subsection of a trouser section not split up by seasonal styles or material or colour and flung across every far corner of the store and hidden amongst other clothes.

There's a restaurant near us that my family loves, the food is pretty good and it's a very nice, fun place to go every now and then. But they do the birthday noise thing, complete with those indoor firework/sparkler things, dinging a cowbell, whooping and blowing buzzers. Several times I've had to run out of the restaurant and it's so embarrassing, either that or I try hard to stay put and can feel my throat start stinging with the need to scream/cry.

Doctors' waiting rooms where they have those children's toys in the corner - the wooden thing with beads that you can push all around the wire. Please someone say you know what I mean and agree.

It is stuck to the table and no bits can go missing BUT it is SO noisy - I hate them and when you are feeling sensitive because yes, you are going to see the doctor, WHY do they have them?

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!