It's World Autism Awareness Day. Come and share your experiences.

[PhilPhilConnors]

What better day than to share your experiences of autism, hopefully together we can dispel some ASD myths!

My ds is 10. He was diagnosed last year after a difficult time of trying to prove to others what we see. He masks very well in all the places where we ever need his ASD to be evident!
He will give eye contact, he will chat to people etc.
In school he behaves perfectly. There are signs there, constant finger flicking, avoiding work, getting giddy, but they're not seen because he's not having meltdowns.
At home he can be lovely, but he needs almost constant supervision, he can be very violent, demand avoidant, intolerant of others.

Out and about, he doesn't look different to any other child, but he will run off and swear, and sometimes grab things off shelves and look incredibly naughty.

I don't do light it up blue.
I have to admit, I didn't know autism awareness day was Autism Speaks, I thought it was just the start of awareness week which the NAS have been advertising heavily on FB.

To me, blue isn't the colour of autism, it's usually represented by the differently coloured jigsaw piece.

Ds is 6 and waiting an ADOS, although every professional agrees he is autistic we need to wait a year to have that box ticked. He also has dyspraxia and muscle tone problems (and severe asthma and lots of problems relating to that too)

He is fantastic, a great drawer, amazing sense of direction and memory for roads. Yes things are often a struggle for him and we have our ups and downs but I wouldn't change him!

There is a poem here to which I can relate a lot. I also like the video NAS has done as it helps shows the impact/distraction of sounds, as that is what I find the most challenging, the inability to lock on to specific sounds over others.

Employable Me is also showing that people on the spectrum do have skills which can be useful in the workplace. I am now in my early 40's and I use my special interests for work. I have no official dx and I don't know if I want one... at my age what would it achieve? Has anyone got a dx as an adult, was it useful to have?

DS is 21. He was diagnosed at 12. His Junior School was terrible (this is a school for nice children). Secondary much much better. He has grown out of some of his more difficult behaviour (throwing furniture, threatening us with knives etc ) and most people don't realise he is autistic, although he does tend to talk at people, rather than having proper conversations. He works for a number of different employers, which suits him better than one job, can drive, and has achieved more than we ever thought possible.

My ds is 11yrs old. He was diagnosed when he was 6yrs, we were devastated and the SN boards on mumsnet really helped me.
My ds is very well behaved, anxious has a speech delay and has sensory issues specifically with noise. He has almost a photographic memory enjoys maths, history, IT and science.

He doesn't really talk to us much although he can talk, I find this heartbreaking and I struggle with it as he'd rather be by himself than with us.
Years of battling with so called professionals being patronising and dismissive, rude and just not treating us like human beings and generally understanding and dealing with autism, have taken their toll on all of us. I outwardly project a strong militant type and I can certainly fight my ds' corner and do at every turn, but the truth is I'm exhausted physically and mentally, I find it hard to grow that thicker skin and pay no attention to idiots but I never do. I worry about him every day, in a world that has zero tolerance I worry what will happen to him when I'm gone.

I was diagnosed a few weeks ago. I'm 40.
The biggest benefit so far is knowing that I'm not rubbish, i find certain things difficult for a reason, not because I'm lazy or not trying hard enough.
I also feel like I'm finally getting to know who I am.
I don't work at the moment, but knowing what I know now, it will mean that I either do something by myself, or there will hopefully be more understanding from a potential employer.

Sorry, that was to NannyNick.

My Ds is 7 years old. He was diagnosed with AS and SPD last year after a 2 year wait for CAMHS. So much for early intervention! He is bright, funny, sociable, makes good eye contact and well behaved.

He has sensory issues, noise upsets him and he wears ear defenders when we go outside. His diet is very restricted, he has asthma, allergies, gut issues (chronic constipation) but is doing quite well in an excellent mainstream school.

His memory is phenomenal (this is how the PEAD described it) he can give you the day for any date you give him within seconds so we get the 'rain man' comments quite often. It boils my piss. He excels at maths as he is very number orientated. His memory for directions means we call him 'our little human satnav' He is for the most part very high functioning.

However, his anxiety is unreal. He spends all day concentrating to 'fit in' and by the time he gets in the car he is quiet, he goes to his room and hides under his duvet with a book. It's his time to make sense of everything. Meal times are a battle, I cook separate meals or he just won't eat. He is very literal. High functioning doesn't mean 'mild' if I had a pound for every time the worlds 'rain man' 'mild' 'he doesn't seem autistic' 'and the old 'he needs a slap' 'let him starve then he will eat' 'leave him with me, I'll sort him' I'd be mortgage free.

I won't 'light it up blue' Autism speaks doesn't speak for me or my son.

My biggest benefit is knowing that i'm not failing at being a person, because that's how it feels when you keep getting things wrong. IMO anyone who moans about "labelling" has no idea how hard it is to live without that label

Twirly, we have a human satnav too. It's fantastic and frustrating in equal measures here.

Despite all this, he is a wonderful, happy and caring little boy. I wouldn't change anything about him. I hate the myths spouted by ignorant people,

Autistic people can and do make eye contact.
Not every child/adult has meltdowns or is violent.
No, they're not like fecking 'Rainman'.
High functioning doesn't = mild.
And finally, when you meet one child with ASD, you've met ONE child with ASD. It is a spectrum and each person on that spectrum will have their own unique difficulties.

My ds2 is a food refuser twirly, big understanding of that luckily he will eat most things eventually, but each meal takes about two hours! (I have no idea how this will work when he starts school in sept) He struggles with textures and a lot of things make him gag, so he chews and chews and chews...! He will happily not eat at all if i dont help/force/encourage him

I agree Sirzy. He corrects us and tries to direct us when we're driving. He read the Highway Code recently, we now have the most annoying back seat driver.

Ds won't touch 'wet food', potatoes, sweets, chocolate, fruit, most veg with the exception of peppers and sweet corn. He will only drink milk or water, sausages have to be a certain brand, he WILL know the difference, he won't eat them until you peel the skin off them. He eats the same sandwiches for lunch, no butter, a certain brand of bread and filling. He would quite happily live on plain pasta.

When I read posts on 'fussy children' I sometimes think they have no clue.

Frizzcat - "He doesn't really talk to us much although he can talk, I find this heartbreaking and I struggle with it as he'd rather be by himself than with us."

I feel that is something my mum has struggled with over the years. My sisters will talk to her for hours on the phone, I just can't do that. Now we have an arrangement the she will call me at a specific time on a specific day of the week and we will have a chat - often not about all that much... the weather, what we did the past week. We also communicate (don't want to use the word chat, as it's not really chatting, it's more fact telling) via Facebook Messenger - so if I have been to a meeting somewhere unusual I can tell her about that whilst still fresh in my mind, not wait till our scheduled talk.

Technology I have found helps as I can type rather than talk and somehow that is better. Thus I like forums and facebook groups, as I get to communicate without really chatting.

PPC - Interesting to know that you have felt that a dx is of help to you. I feel I have self labelled myself over the past few years, especially since meeting parents of children on the spectrum and them saying that they think my characteristics are similar to their child's. You get to recognise your strengths and weaknesses and you try to mould your life around that - I know I will never be the life and soul at a party, that I really dislike parties and networking events but can now tolerate a group meeting if it is on a subject I like.

Great thread! I don't light anything blue for reasons described above. I think the NAS TMI campaign that's just launched is fab. I think awareness raising is exactly what's needed. Also people need to realise that no we are not all on the spectrum and yes each person on the spectrum is an individual. I love seeing all the autism posts on my Facebook this week as its generating interest and getting people talking. I have a son with autism who never fails to amaze me.

Beyond - we knew he wouldn't eat school meals so we send him in with packed lunch. We know it's the only meal he will happily eat without constant encouragement. It's the same lunch every single day.

He must be the only KS1 pupil to not eat the free school meals given to all KS1 pupils in his class. He sits with the KS2 classes at lunchtime.

Is there a lunch he will happily eat that you could send him in with as a Packed lunch?

I agree the new NAS TMI campaign is excellent and I've been sharing the video to raise awareness.

Please watch if you haven't already seen it.

www.autism.org.uk/get-involved/tmi/film.aspx

I work with children with Autism and I love my kids loads. They have the mosta beautiful personlities and each bit of progress is celebrated big One of the things I have learned that children with Autism are able to use their imagination and play together, you just need to play with them and motivate them

DS2 is 14. He loves Minecraft, YouTube, Maths, Science, playing the clarinet and reading. He is affectionate, kind, considerate and very witty.

He has some difficulties with sensory issues, motor skills and social skills.

I love him as he is, but if I could wave a magic wand, I'd like him to be able to have friends.

I'm a woman with autism and I was diagnosed a couple of years ago in my early 30s. I've suffered with severe depression and anxiety all my life and I'm often suicidal. I've never managed to hold down a proper job and I don't expect to be able to in the future, although I have several university degrees. I can't drive and I have very poor navigation. I've always struggled with social situations and I have no real friends, but I have a DH and a close family and I don't really seek friendship. I'm very introverted and don't feel too lonely, just comfortable with my own company.

I have meltdowns but only in private - most people would have no idea. Keeping a 'normality' mask is important to me. I'm not too fussy about food, and sensory issues are minimal.

My diagnosis is important to me personally, although it hasn't gained me much in the way of support. I get PIP and ESA and have a disabled bus pass, and I have a council flat and input from the CMHT.

Thank you nannynick I know he has his own way of communicating. It does happen sometimes and when it does it's just wonderful, such a lift is hard to put into words.

I know exactly what you mean, Frizzcat. DS2 won't chat; if you try he resorts to stock phrases to shut you down. Occasionally I read something he has written at school and it's wonderful. All these thoughts going on in his head but he finds it so hard to share them.

Nice to see you EllenJane glad them knickers are holding up. My ds communicates with other people in different ways. He tells me what he thinks I want to hear to shut me down quickly.

The amount of times I've sat with one of the prof's and calmly explained, "no ds doesn't love English, he despises it but he's telling you that because he thinks that what you want and once he's figured out what you want he can move on".

Cue shock that someone with autism can think in that way and then cue fierce militant mother, it really is so very tiring.

Both my Dc's have autism and a very different with it. Polar opposites in fact which can make for a very interesting and challenging home life, but we muddle through.

Currently my youngest is going through the dog phase, to cope with any situation he likes or hates he becomes a dog. The other days we were walking past a car and it's alarm went off and he stopped and just started barking at it, as you do. He's 6! I just find it funny and gently usher him along. a sense if humour is a must.