...to hate the term 'alpha male'?

[Tabsicle]

It drives me irrationally insane.

Humans are not wolves! No man, even if he works in the city, is responsible for forging his team into a lean, mean, hunting machine, bringing down deer with lethal precision using only their teeth and claws.

Nonsense evolutionary pop psychology at its worst.

You can tell it's Easter and I have time on my hands, right?

To be honest it's just a personality type....I'm an ENTJ and have the sort of personality that would or might be described as Alpha but I'm definitely not a dick or a sociopath!

Where it all goes wrong is people (generally those who have that personality type) believing that it's somehow 'better' or 'above' other types.

The so-called Alpha type can be positive (leadership qualities, drive, focused, calm in a crisis) or negative (bossy, bullish, aggressive, bulldozing) leanings.

An Alpha type is no more a 'sociopath' than a Beta is a 'weakling'. All types are needed in society...unfortunately there are a group of people who decide they want to be Alpha types and model themselves on an extreme version. These people probably aren't actually really what would be categorised as an Alpha type as that behaviour is usually driven by insecurity and a specific type of neediness which is not 'Alpha' at all.

I know a couple of self-defined alpha males. They're both from large families and are genuinely scared of ever being on their own. To compensate, they need to insert themselves into groups and dominate them. That's their definition of alpha. To me they just transparently over-compensate for an inability to be a functioning independent human.

I agree OP.

We are men and women, not "males" and "females" of an indeterminate species. I dislike it when men refer to "females" when they mean women, and
dislike "males" when it should be men.

So "alpha man" would be more like it, but even so, I think "alpha man/woman/male/female/person" is a silly and artificial term. The idea of certain people being "alpha" and thus more important than others is not something I go along with.

I thought Alpha male came from Brave New World?

All the Alphas in Brave New World seem to be men (it doesn't explicitly state that there are no Alpha woman, or mention what caste the main female character is but you sort of twig that she's a Beta). Alpha men are bigger, more muscular and more intelligent than lower castes - they are bred that way so that the lower castes respect them more.

I thought that descriptions of alpha males in packs of wolves, velociraptors etc all stemmed from this.

I would think of an alpha male or female as someone who seems to have lucked out in all areas: looks, body, athleticism, brains, personality/charisma. Anyone who described themselves, publicly as an "alpha male" or "alpha female" would be an "alpha twat" though.

Hmm..alpha twat? I don't consider I fit that, and neither I'd imagine would anyone who knows me. And I haven't 'lucked out' in any of those personal characteristics.
It is awfully British to deride this notion - as was said up thread, it's v probably merely a personality type, but gets lots of cartoon tags thrown at it.
fwiw to my mind to be a useful alpha male or female you need to demonstrate among other things leadership skills, which are taught. And to do that you need to know how to accept leadership which takes a dollop of humility and a recognition of your own deficiencies. This obv is wildly at variance with the cartoon version chucked around here and elsewhere.

beta types are so annoying

Cool.

and a Lanark boy too! Bellshill for my sins.

And I haven't 'lucked out' in any of those personal characteristics. so by MY definition you wouldn't be an Alpha, Pand Not that I am saying my definition is right.

As I see it, Boris Johnson, for example, would be an Alpha Male if he were not so fat and ugly.

Alpha/Beta are stereotypes and most people don't fit in to either category. They are ridiculous over-simplifications and humanity is obviously a good deal more diverse, thank goodness!

I work with several 'alphas'. They, coincidentally, are the men with the loudest voices, the biggest opinions and the smallest work ethic.

Waves to BalloonSlayer. So good to see I'm not the only one :)

alphas are notorious hard workers.

Alpha male conjures up to me the kind of guy who can't be faithful, is always on the prowl and just can't keep his thing inside his pants.

I've always gone for the beta, or delta or even gamma male (except for a very brief period in my youth when I dated an alpha male who did the above things)

Really BalloonSlayer? Wow. I was under the impression it was a well-known phrase used in describing animal behaviour, and that Brave New World just used the terminology.

You may well be right Trills. I just assumed that as Brave New World was written in 1932 it coined the term.

Gonna google now!

Can't find out although one source says the term "alpha male" has only been in common usage since the 1960s

Oooooooooh.

I'm going to add that to things I've learned from MN :o

I know there were characters that were Alpha, Beta, Gamma etc. in Brave New World. I don't recall the Alphas being referred to as "Alpha males/females" though?

To me it's the complete opposite of what some people described. Far from being insecure and needing to dominate a group, an alpha male is self confident and has no need to prove themselves. They are a competent leader, someone who will always protect and take care of their own, and almost always has a very strong and committed work ethic and high moral values.

I associate that term with "apes"

Would you care to elaborate?

In my opinion, being an "alpha" is a quality that can only be judged and used appropriately by other people who know you, not by yourself. Same as with other qualities such as "humble", "successful" and "selfless".

People who call themselves any of these qualities, or who have to loudly insist they are, are the ones who are not :P

(see Trump... "I am a very clever guy")

in nature programmes they describe silverbacks as Alpha males, so I guess I mean gorillas technically. My first recollection of that term was a biology lesson documentary. I can't help but think of an ape/gorilla face even if its used to describe men

People self defining as alphas makes me laugh. I just find it so silly.