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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

New next door neighbours... help

71 replies

confusedlilly · 12/03/2016 20:09

We have new next door neighbours they brought the house 3 weeks ago..

It's a young male and he came and introduced himself a few days after moving in, and let us know that this particular evening it was going to be quite noisy but he knew we had a young dd so wouldn't be working too late on the house (complete refurb by the sounds of things)

We understood this is to sort of be expected he finished working at 7.30pm and all was fine. Dd goes to bed at 7pm so wasn't too much past her bedtime.

However, all this week he has been working on the house, drilling, hammering, using all kinds of power tooles up until gone 10pm. I have some how held it in but I am loosing the plot. I am 38 weeks pregnant not sleeping at night as it is, dd is being disturbed making her grouchy!

I am sat here at 8pm on a Saturday night listening to him banging away! Dd can't sleep and I can't relax! I slept for a total of 4 hours last night and I just want to chill before I try and go to bed.

Please give me permission to go and tell him to shut the hell up!!

Annoys me even more that he has been out all day and waits until 7pm before even starting any work!! AngryAngry

OP posts:
YouTheCat · 12/03/2016 20:11

I'm sure there are laws that say you can't use power tools after 8pm.

Will have a google.

Peaceandloveeveryone · 12/03/2016 20:12

If you can bear it I would not complain as its hopefully a short term thing. He might well be working all day and can only do work in the evenings. He did come round and has tried to be friendly.
I would do anything to avoid falling out with neighbours though after I asked them to stop being noisy (speakers in garden blasting music out every day). It was awful and we had to move.

YouTheCat · 12/03/2016 20:16

Check out your local council's environment page. It seems it varies.

luciole15 · 12/03/2016 20:17

You could try talking to him without complaining. It's not legal to do building work at this time of night on a Sat but I wouldn't go down that route with him at the moment. Maybe you can work out some kind of a schedule with him? He's prob excited about first home and doing lots of diy after work.

confusedlilly · 12/03/2016 20:17

I'm trying my best to remain calm. Lack of sleep on my half isn't helping.

He does work in the day mon-Fri, I'm just annoyed that he gets in from work at 5pm and doesn't start doing any drilling, banging until 7pmish. When he first came round he brought up the fact we had a young child and we told him she doesn't go to bed until 7 so it shouldn't disturb her too much (when he first came over it was around 4.30pm)

I can handle it until about 8 and then I just loose the plot because I'm tired, dd is tired etc

OP posts:
Gizlotsmum · 12/03/2016 20:20

I would ask if he would mind keeping the noise down after 7:30. He may not realise how much you can hear if he apologised early on then he seems like the sensitive type so probable approachable. There must be something quieter he can do later or on the other side of the house to minimise the noise impact on you.

ridemesideways · 12/03/2016 20:23

I'd knock on his door with a sweet smile and politely ask him how long the worst of the noise is likely to last. Say it's a friendly neighbourhood and you don't want to be difficult, but if he could kindly agree to keep it down after Xpm please, you'd really appreciate it?

Peaceandloveeveryone · 12/03/2016 20:23

I don't think that there are any laws related to people doing DIY in their own homes, just environmental local guidelines about noise which is usually issued by the council and often for 11pm onwards.

Peaceandloveeveryone · 12/03/2016 20:25

I do feel for you though and he probably doesn't get how tired you are and what it's like having your children. I remember losing it at a teenager who kept skating up and down the pavement outside my house when I was pregnant. I absolutely couldn't cope with the noise.

Lurkedforever1 · 12/03/2016 20:28

If he's got either a drill/hammer/saw going non stop every Eve then I can see it might be annoying. But if you're talking about the more likely scenario of using diy tools in the eve, I think you're being a bit precious.

yabu to complain he doesn't do it at 5pm. Presumably he has a commute and wants to eat and change before starting diy? Strikes me he's actually being considerate stopping at 8.

And in response to a pp, the rules on using tools after a certain time refer to business, not personal diy, which would come under normal noisy neighbour/ council.

AntiHop · 12/03/2016 20:28

I understand how stressful it is. But I think it's quite likely that he had no idea how noisy it is for you and how much it's affecting you. I would talk to him calmly and explain the impact it's having. Hood luck.

peggyundercrackers · 12/03/2016 20:38

Most councils have some kind of guidelines on their web site about noise. Here is the ones for Woking council www.woking.gov.uk/noisenuisance who suggest 8am to 9pm is acceptable for noise from DIY.

Summerwood1 · 12/03/2016 20:39

He sounds nice to have explained it to you. If he's at work and doesn't get in until 5pm he must need to make his tea and have relax before doing work. It won't be a long term thing. Can you put head phones on and listen to some nice music.

29herzie · 12/03/2016 20:45

I feel for you OP it must be driving you mad. I would be careful how you talk to him about it though. In 2 weeks his refurb will be finished... And you will have a newborn! Revenge is sweet ( and not fattening). Wink

Of course your new DC might be a delightful sleeper from day one... But I am very aware of how tolerant my neighbours are of my DS when he lets rip for most of the wee hours!

Trollicking · 12/03/2016 20:46

Just go and speak to him.

lorelei9 · 12/03/2016 20:49

oh OP I feel for you Flowers

here's what I'd do

  1. check with your local council what constitutes acceptable hours for DIY

  2. If he's doing anything that falls outside the hours, go round and point out he is contravening those rules. If he's nice about it - great. If not, get environmental health on to it and also emphasise how noisy it is. Ask him to pop to yours while you leave whatever power tool on - he might be surprised at the noise.

  3. ask him how long he plans for this work to go on. Ask him if you can negotiate a bit - if he does this every night, it's not fair to you. He should start earlier if he can. Also, he could do the work 3 nights a week instead of 5.

sometimes the oddest things help. I lost my rag with a noisy neighbour after weeks of asking nicely and she stopped. It was weird because I was embarrassed for shouting but I seem to have scared her Grin

lorelei9 · 12/03/2016 20:51

I think OP was looking for something without a swear word in it Grin

it's a combo of red herring, straw man and non sequitur....

lorelei9 · 12/03/2016 20:52

oops sorry wrong thread!! [embarrassed]

Maryz · 12/03/2016 20:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

confusedlilly · 12/03/2016 20:59

Yes I can't wait for new born to get here! Lol!!

He is still at it now, dd seems to have finally given up and settled to sleep.. Keeps fingers crossed. I am going to give it until 10pm and then I am going to knock on the door and ask him to give it rest for the night.

OP posts:
Peaceandloveeveryone · 12/03/2016 21:01

Actually that's a really good point, you might well be disturbing him in a few weeks time.

SuperFlyHigh · 12/03/2016 21:03

He isn't BU in my opinion. He probably wants to get the work done hence up til 8pm tonight.

The other nights well it's after work, he's commuted, wants to relax and eat etc so why should he start as soon as he gets in?

He sounds ok if you can talk to him so just ask nicely how long he'll be. Don't go down the noise officer route unless you really want a difficult neighbour.

LifeofI · 12/03/2016 21:04

He is prob one of those people who start something and want to finish however this isnt your problem and would 100% piss me off.
You should mention it to him

SuperFlyHigh · 12/03/2016 21:05

You could ask him to stop working when you go to bed eg 11pm or earlier but if he needs to get work done (and after all he has just moved in) I think he just wants to get the work done now and ASAP.

MidniteScribbler · 12/03/2016 21:06

If he's a young guy, then 10pm may very well be what he considers 'early'. He sounds like the reasonable type by coming to see you, so he may just need someone to point out the general expectation of no power tools after a certain time.

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