Should baby drink Coke or go thirsty?

[FoundDoveInaSoaplessPlace]

We are travelling in SE Asia with a baby and toddler.
Yesterday our planned journey of a 2 hour drive and 30 minute ferry took a total of nine hours. Because of the road delays ( road works and further on a bad accident) we missed the ferry and had to get into a small local boat.
It was hot and humid all day but we got through it ok until the final leg on the boat. Our 12 mo baby got very thirsty and the only drink left was a new bottle of Diet Coke. Baby got extremely agitated and our friend poured some into her bottle as I was holding onto our toddler.

DH who was holding her refused to give it to her and said she would have to wait for clean water. She screamed for 15 minutes until she wore herself out and fell asleep. It was dark and the sea was choppy so I couldn't stand up to give it to her.

DH is extremely anti sugar but AIBU to think that he could have put his principles aside on this one occasion?

Your husband is an absolute idiot and a cruel one too. What nonsense. Diet coke ie real coke are liquids and better than nothing in an emergency.

Also there is no sugar in diet coke

Mine would have just chugged down the coke. Id not have been concerned about it as I one off thing.
I fail to see what harm it could do.

If your husband is so fixated on sugar that he would risk making your child ill, then he really isn't a great dad. Sometimes you have to balance the risks and he needs to learn how to do this.

Being so rigid is setting you up for problems in later life - the children that are denied all sweet treats are usually the ones that are found hiding under the table at a party with a tub of haribo, rather than playing with their friends. Your children need to be taught what a healthy diet is and having the occasional treat is part of this.

Well in answer to the Aibu I guess the answer is 'drink coke' but what a balls up all round to get in that situation.

You do realise there is no sugar in Diet Coke?

He is not a good father if he risks dehydration because of some non existent sugar. Leaving a 1 year old thirsty is dangerous and cruel.

He sounds stupid tbh.

my aibu was whether DH could have relaxed his no sugar for children policy just once?

You're travelling with small children in a low wealth part of the world & he's trying to keep first world perfectionism ideals? What's the point of going if you just want to hold onto your usual values rigidly? Heaven forbid your cultural prejudices or values should be challenged.

Sorry but your DH's reaction was borderline cruel. I'm not one for buying juice or pop, apart from the odd occasion, precisely because of the caffeine, sugar/aspartame and other nasties. But it wouldn't have occurred to me, in a situation like you described - to refuse my child some to quench their thirst. In fact, I'd have grabbed it gratefully and given it myself! Your DH was a twat and you shouldn't have stood for it

Poor baby. You both sound like dickheads.

I'm a grown adult and got very dehydrated very quickly on a very hot day in the middle of London last year. It made me quite poorly.
So I can't imagine how your dd must have been feeling in SA OP. Unexpected travel delays are a PITA and your DH was BU to have not allowed a little diet coke to help considering you were quite literally, stuck, at the time. Its not like it was a can of Monster is it?

I'd have given the coke, it wouldn't have hurt to have a small amount and may have made her more comfortable. We do a lot of travelling in quite difficult places with our kids and we find we need to bend the usual rules, but it doesn't do any long term harm. Also I've noticed sugar has less of an impact in hot places, I think they sweat it out!

Op I'm more concerned about the fact that you were on a boat with a baby and toddler which was so choppy that you couldn't even move to get your bag. Where on earth were you? Sounds so dangerous.

Please answer the question that so many have asked- how could 3 adults not know that there is no sugar in DIET Coke?!

Your husband sounds like the worst sort of over-principled and under- informed parent, latching doggedly on to a self-imposed half-baked rule with no ability to understand the wider context.

'Yes it is better than nothing. armchair however prepared you are, sometimes things happen, that's life!'

I've done, seen and travelled a lot in the last 56 years, with and without my children. I know that shit happens, and that usually it's better to plan ahead, compromise or go with the flow rather than be an insular, autocratic arse. Especially if I'm making others suffer for my principles.

Sounds like the best solution in a difficult situation to me. And sometimes that is what parenting is all about.

That's what I thought scarlett
If I was travelling with a baby and a toddler and had missed the ferry I would stay overnight and get the next ferry. No way would I get in a small local boat in waters so choppy I couldn't even reach my bag without being in danger. Seems frankly fucking ridiculous to worry about a bit of sugar when you're prepared to expose them to to that much risk

sounds awful, why wouldnt you either go and get the bloody water (DH/Friend) or just give the baby a bit of the coke

Interestingly, in around 2004 ish we took our small toddler DC to hospital with severe diarrhea, and the medical staff said to give him flat (full fat) coke to rehydrate him in an emergency, although googling it now seems they dont say that

www.nhs.uk/news/2009/04April/Pages/FlatSoftDrinksStomachBugs.aspx
"Flat Coca-Cola should not be given to children with diarrhoea and vomiting as it is a 'myth' it settles their stomachs, parents have been warned. New NHS guidelines warn that while there is a common belief that the soft drink can help ease the symptoms of gastroenteritis it can actually make the condition worse.22 Apr 2009"

but i still think you should have given the baby a drink some how - big parenting fail!

The child was probably picking up on the tension in the boat.It sounds hellish.
Rather than defuse the moment with a few sips of Coke he let the child cry itself to sleep!
I would freak out & question weather or not I would continue with the trip.

That quote refers to vomiting and diarrhoea

Not flat Coca Cola which I used when suffering dehydration in Egypt which caused cramps

Apart from the ridiculousness of your DH being perfectly ok with the risk of travelling in a small boat on choppy water, but god forbid your DC should risk drinking sugar (WHEN THERE IS NONE!) in Diet Coke rather than get dehydrated, I can't help but wonder what he'll do when she starts going to kids parties and there's wall to wall sugar. As a pp has pointe out, she'll probably be the kid hiding under the table with a ton of haribo. He'd be better off with the everything in moderation mindset, than blanket banning of all sugar. That's the way to make kids resolutely determined to have it when they are old enough to see their friends with cakes and sweets. Good luck there.

I'm feeling slightly inadequate now as my dh doesn't give a tinkers cuss about sugar and would have had our baby chugging from that bottle within a minute

Your DH certainly has very poor judgement. I can't believe that anyone would rate the risk of ingesting sugar (or sweeteners) as higher than the risk of dehydration (a potentially extremely serious risk for a baby).

But as others have said what were you doing in choppy waters on a small boat with a 12 month baby?

Both of you need to get better at contingency planning :-/

In an emergency, i would give the child the coke to drink. It wasn't long that it was advised to be used when a child had gastroenteritis. I clearly remember that the nurse has said, in order to rehydrate to give flat coke in the baby bottle. It is now definetly not advised now. I remember when my twins had this illness [nearly 30 years ago] feeling weird giving them flat coke in a baby bottle but that was advised to maintain their fluids. Funny how things change. If its a one off, i dont see the harm. The child is suffering from being thirsty. Much crueler to let that go on imo.