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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to leave a snotty note on my door for post woman

85 replies

Shosha1 · 25/02/2016 11:55

We moved into this house 5 months ago.

And ever since the post woman won't ring the bell!

So if we have parcels ( which is often) we end up having to go get them from the sorting office 12 miles away!

We put a not under the bell saying please ring the bell.

Still we are getting ' you were not in' notes put through the door

I saw her the other day ( we can't see front door from lounge ) as I was coming in. She was putting a not in note through.

I told her my DH was in, and had she rung the bell ?

She insisted it didn't work. I pressed it and ding dong it worked.

Anyway took parcel and went in.

Yesterday yet again a not in notice.

So today I put a note on door saying

Royal Mail we are in. Please ring !

OP posts:
MonsterClaws · 25/02/2016 12:35

I drew up the other day as did my postie holding a parcel he had forgotten to try to deliver earlier. He just popped back with it, my little boy bellows, 'you are the best postman in the world' at him And I think he might be right.
I would ask yours nicely one last time then complain.

FellOutOfBedTwice · 25/02/2016 12:35

I can beat all of your bad postmen stories. In a house I used to live in, I was pottering around one morning when I heard the letterbox. Went into the hall and there were several white envelope covered in copious, fresh blood. After thinking for a minute that we were being targeted in some kind of hate campaign I opened the door and saw the postman on the street, holding his bloody hand. I called out to him and said "excuse me but my post is covered in blood!" And he replied "yeah, I've cut my hand!" And just walked off. It was Christmas time and he was carrying a Royal Mail bag but didn't have a uniform.

I was flabbergasted. And threw that post away without directly touching it. I made a complaint but nothing came of it and the woman I got when I rang couldn't have cared less.

So, YANBU to be annoyed OP but I wouldn't expect miracles when you complain!

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 25/02/2016 12:36

Have you got space for one of those outdoor deposit boxes?

But I would complain too. I always think our local corner shop would make more money if they just accepted parcels and stored them for a small charge.

LovelyFriend · 25/02/2016 12:39

make a complaint to the PO - she is creating more work for everyone, not just hassle for you, so they will want to deal with it.

oldjacksscrote · 25/02/2016 12:44

Do you tip the postie?
Not ringing the doorbell is beyond lazy and she should get a bollocking for it, from her manager.

SecondMrsAshwell · 25/02/2016 12:55

I had that from a milkman many years ago. He hadn't collected his milk money for nearly two months (beginning of December to end of Jan), so we owed him quite a bit. When my mother finally managed to get hold of him, he said he'd been every Saturday in January at about 2 o'clock.

I was so broke from Christmas that I didn't go shopping with mum and dad for the whole of January, so I was in the house at the times he'd said he'd been. He hadn't rung the doorbell, or even used the knocker.

He said "Are you calling me a liar?" I said yes and he stomped off.

Turns out the dairy had no record of us being customers at all.

Sorry to hijack. Returns to postmen..... That is crappy and my dad - a postman for 50 years - would not have done that.

JessieMcJessie · 25/02/2016 13:02

I don't understand why filling out a card (don't they have to copy down a serial number on to it? ) is faster than just ringing the bell and handing you the parcel.

I once had a DHL signed-for delivery where the guy didn't ring my flat, where I was in and awaiting the delivery, but instead dumped the parcel on my building's front desk without alerting the security guard or getting a signature. He then filled out his electronic record to say I had signed for it!

I know what he did because the guard and I watched the CCTV footage when the parcel went missing and DHL claimed I had already received it.

Complained to DHL and they were really apologetic, accepted 100% that this was not acceptable.

Can you set up a watch at your front door, catch her in the act of putting through a card without ringing the bell and then complain to Royal Mail on that basis?

notquitehuman · 25/02/2016 13:04

My postman knocks on the door and rings the bell with such urgency that you'd think he was being chased by an axe murderer. Sorry it takes me more than 2 seconds to get to the door. No need to hold the fecking bell down until my ears bleed.

I'd be more pissed off about silent lady though. Get some massive heavy stuff delivered, and if she takes it back then request a redelivery. It'll soon piss her off.

PuppyMonkey · 25/02/2016 13:06

My lovely postman will often come back later if I don't answer - he knows I'm usually in as I work from home. My house is on edge of village so he probably has to pass me when he finishes for the day.

MiniCooperLover · 25/02/2016 13:09

We have a fantastic postman so I always know when he's on holiday or away as things end up being put half way through the door or slammed through. I think part of it is they don't even bother carrying the parcel or they've left it at the depot and never had any intention of delivering it

Hygge · 25/02/2016 13:11

You should complain.

In our last house, we had a postwoman who had some sort of vendetta against us, although she extended it to anybody who owned a dog.

It started when she left a parcel containing some electrical items sitting in the middle of the front path.

It was in full view of anybody who walked by. We were away for a few days, and it must have rained the entire time because we came home to disintegrated cardboard and ruined contents.

I complained about her. Not only was our parcel ruined, it was obvious to anybody that we were not at home during the time it was left on the path.

She then responded by taking normal post, letters and things, to a relative of DH's who lived nearby. No reason for this, they found it odd, we found it annoying.

She claimed she thought it would be safer with them if we were not in, even though it was stuff that would fit through the letterbox. She said that some things looked important, so she wanted to give them to somebody in person rather than leave them in the letterbox.

We asked her to stop leaving our letters and things with them but she wouldn't, every day she'd give our post to them instead of putting it through our door. Again, we complained about her because speaking to her hadn't helped and it was the only way to get our post delivered to our house.

Not long after that we had several days with no post whatsoever. Nothing was delivered to us.

And then a neighbour approached us and said the postwoman was claiming to have been bitten by our dog, and she had told them she wouldn't deliver anything else to us, we'd have to go to the office to collect it.

On the day in question, I was at home, nobody knocked, no post came through the door, the dog was locked in the house and the only way she would have been able to bite anybody was if they stuck their hand right through the letterbox (which had two flaps and those brushes on it) and waved their hand about inside while the very small dog jumped halfway up the door to grab them.

And since I was at home, I would have heard all that happening.

But that didn't happen, as the postwoman claimed she hadn't put her hand inside the letterbox even just a little bit. She said the dog had bitten her through it while her hand was outside.

There is no possible way that could have happened, unless the dog had learned to levitate and operate a letterbox, and extended her face through several inches of letterbox including the flaps and brushes, and bit someone who's hand was, in their own words, not near the door at all.

The postwoman could not explain to anybody how a dog managed to bite her through a locked door, when she was on one side, the dog was on the other, the dog couldn't possibly reach out through the letterbox, and she hadn't put her hand inside it.

She showed her injury to another neighbour, and they said wasn't a bite, it looked like she had cut her hand on something sharp, like a knife or a nail or something. It was a thin slice wound rather than puncture marks from teeth.

I believe she cut herself on something while out delivering and lied about it to get her own back for the previous complaints we had had to make about her. She apparently didn't seek any medical treatment so had nothing to say what might have caused the injury.

She then lied to the man who was covering her round while she was on holiday, and told him we had asked her not to deliver any of our post as we had security issues and wanted to collect it all from the sorting office. I spoke to him and he told me what she said. He was more than happy to bring all of our post but she had told him not to.

Talking to other people on the street, I found out she had refused to deliver to any houses where the people owned a dog.

I had to complain to the ombudsman about her, sending them proof of all the previous complaints we had had to make about her, to get our post delivered to our house again.

It took months to sort out, but they agreed with me because, based on her own testimony, it just wasn't possible for the dog to have reached her or bitten her. It just could not have happened at all.

Coupled with the previous complaints we had made, and statements from other neighbours that she was doing the same thing to them, she had to start re-delivering to our house. I think they should have sacked her.

But you have my sympathy OP, the inconvenience and hassle it causes is horrible, especially when you are home but have to wait hours to be able to collect your post, and make daily trips to get it.

DS was just a baby at the time and the post office collection area was up steps and through a narrow door. It was really inaccessible with the pram, but DH was away and I had nobody else to help me.

She made my life a nightmare for months, just out of petty spite because we'd had to complain about her before.

Collaborate · 25/02/2016 13:19

I fell for you OP - and the others who've experienced similar problems.

We're fortunate here. We have a porch that we never lock. The letter box in the porch is really inconvenient (an inch or two off the floor - we inherited it), but the posties usually open the door and chuck letters and parcels in. Usually, but not always, they close the door behind them, but it can be a bugger to close so I'll forgive them that.

LarrytheCucumber · 25/02/2016 13:28

The spring on our letterbox was broken by a postie trying to force a package through the letterbox, and now it rattles when there is a wind.Angry
Our regular postman is notorious for putting letters in the wrong doors, sometimes for the same number in the next street! He is, however, very good with parcels and he leaves them with a neighbour. I think it is because he doesn't want to carry them round.
DS has a lot of parcels. We found a Christmas gift helped!

Cressandra · 25/02/2016 13:28

It is maddening.

This may sound silly but have you checked your doorbell works when the door is closed? When our one's battery is low, it doesn't work through a closed door but if you open the door and press it, it dongs. Took us many months to figure out. However if she's not knocking either that's no excuse.

Everythinggettingbigger · 25/02/2016 13:38

This isn't Royal Mail its been Yodel but when they deliver and we aren't in (most of the time as we both work full time) they always leave a note saying the parcel is over the side gate.......the side gate which leads round the back of 6 houses, the side gate does not lead straight into our garden!!

Im tempted to complain but then think it could lead to someone losing their job but then again one of the "parcels" they left "over the gate" was a set of golf clubs!!

This is very strange that she just wont deliver to your house, I wonder if she didn't get on with the people before you? not that it should effect her ability to ring your door bell!

OOAOML · 25/02/2016 13:46

We're in a flat and we used to get quite a few of the 'you were out' cards even though we knew we'd been in. I think they didn't want to carry (relatively small) parcels about - which is fair enough, but if you have a job delivering post in a city with lots of flats, you surely expect to do quite a lot of walking up and down stairs with a heavy bag. We also go through phases of getting post for the second and third floors (we're first floor).

I tend to get stuff delivered to work now, the guys in the mailroom sign for everything, let you know when it comes, have a charity tin when you collect - so much simpler.

InQuiteAPickle · 25/02/2016 13:49

It drives me loopy when people don't ring the bell. I'm deaf so I don't always hear a knock but the doorbell is so loud that it makes me jump.

Some post people don't even knock though! I saw one of our post men walking up the path and from my window saw him put something through the letterbox. I presumed it was a letter but it was one of those "you weren't in" notes. Luckily he was still in the street so I got my parcel but I told him off for not knocking. Angry

Kummerspeck · 25/02/2016 13:56

We have had this too but only in the run-up to Christmas when our normal postie's round is split. I complained that I had been in when the postman claimed to have tried to deliver but the sorting office just said they are busy and have too much to carry due to the increase in online shopping

Worst one we had was a missing parcel which the company insisted had been delivered and signed for. Some time later a man handed it in at our door, said his friend lived further up our road but worked away and he just popped in and checked the place every now and again. Had found a card saying our parcel had been delivered then found the parcel thrown over a side gate. It was ruined as had sat outside for a few weeks.

MammaTJ · 25/02/2016 13:57

My lovely postie walks around my house, into my messy garden and to the porch at the back and leaves parcels there for me.

I caught him one day and thanked him and he said he did it as that was once my 'special instruction' on a parcel and he remembered! Fabulous man!

shovetheholly · 25/02/2016 13:58

Parcel safe?

LavenderRain · 25/02/2016 13:59

YANBU
our postie is usually pretty good but yesterday crammed 2 light bulbs through the letterbox Confused He didn't ring the bell and the parcel said fragile
Luckily the bulbs were ok but the boxes were wrecked!

RattieOfCatan · 25/02/2016 14:05

I'd complain, but be aware that complaining can make things worse. DH complained before Christmas. A load of our post wasn't turning up and there were no notes or anything. I ordered something that I needed ASAP and with the stuff not turning up I got it delivered to my local corner shop/post office. The guy was really pissed off with DH as loads of the parcels we'd been expecting, along with loads for our house mates, were behind his counter. He was told that notes had been left for us and didn't believe DH when he explained that we'd had nothing.

DH then complained and now the posties, depending on which one it is, either refuse to deliver parcels here or they insist on handing it to somebody rather than leaving it in the porch like they used to be happy to do!

ThomasSofty · 25/02/2016 14:20

You don't even need to ring up the sorting office to arrange redelivery, you can do it all online and select the day that is convenient for you as well. It has always worked well when I have missed parcels. Some of these stories are awful! My main problem is that posties and couriers are forever knocking on my door asking if I will take parcels in for other houses, and in the case of royal mail I have one of those opt-out stickers on the letterbox. So annoying.

thebiscuitindustry · 25/02/2016 14:21

YANBU

FauxFox · 25/02/2016 14:31

Did you not offer him a plaster felloutofbed? What was he meant to do if he had nothing to stop the blood? Not deliver any post at all? Confused