My kids have just made me cry... Aibu to take them home?

[TaraBoxBrain]

DH and I divorced 2 years ago. Long story, my mother who I've always had issues with took his 'side' and he now lives with her while waiting for new mortgage

We have 3 DC, 5, 8 and 10.

I have them 4 days a week, he has them 2/3.

I live with my partner and am 3 months pregnant, not planned. Nobody knows yet.

Ex DH has just returned from taking them on a break to his parents house at the seaside with his GF. They had an amazing time.

I wanted to take them away too, pretty short on money at the moment but found a nice farm a couple of hours away for 3 days. I told ex DH I was worried they might not have as good a time with me and that is find it difficult on my own. He said just let them do what they want to do and it'll be fine....

So, I've taken them out, had lunch out, bought them some bits and generally had fun.

Get back to farm, I'm exhausted, have little lie down and say they can watch one episode of some minecraft programme. They watch two and go to put another on, refuse to give remote back and when I take the remote they tell me they had a much better time with daddy, I'm lazy because I've just been asleep and start to sing a song about what a slob I am while dancing around. I definitely not a slob!

I said I'll happily take them back today and they say good. I'm not crying in the bathroom. I feel awful, should I take them home or am I being hormonal? They have had a lovely two days and I don't know what more I could have done?

Yes, sorry for scan reading and not noticing nobody knows you're pregnant yet.

You did well. :)

Please don't confide in your ex about your difficulties.

The fact that he lives with your mother tells us all we need to know about what a pair of shits you are dealing with. They are not on your side.

hmc yes, I'd say it was a battle worth having. When I say no to my children, I mean no. They backchat and cause drama and they only ruin stuff for themselves. My eight year old was a beast earlier, so he's now having an evening of my music instead of his game shows. I'm the parent, that's how it works.

Well, obviously re 'no' meaning 'no'! - but maybe keep the "no" for important stuff. Why have these overly strict limitations on screen time, especially during a holiday... Ds (11) spent a lot of time on his pc over the half term - and he hasn't grown two heads. He is well adjusted, popular, plays sport inside and outside of school and does well academically (attends grammar school).... Why such arbitrary rules such as two short programmes on minecraft and then strictly no more? I'd kick off over that too if I was a child. Most of us don't impose these tight limits on ourselves

They had already watched it for a good hour or so in the morning.

There were so many games to play together rather than watching tv. For me, it's important they interact during the holidays.

They have had a much happier time since the tv's gone off yesterday, playing backgammon, chess, running around outside at the moment.

They aren't whingey and zoned out in the way there are after spending too long watching tv.