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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to leave my baby in the garden to sleep?

676 replies

SashaFierce99 · 14/02/2016 23:44

With three older siblings, it's difficult for baby to nap uninterrupted at the weekend/in holidays. She's just over a year old so still needs at least one long or two short naps per day. When her siblings are off we tend to walk/scoot/skate/bike to the park before her nap and she falls asleep in the pushchair on the way home. I then leave her in the front garden in front of the kitchen window and DCs and I paint/bake/draw in the kitchen so she's in sight at all times.

Today we did the above but there was a knock at the door ten minutes after we arrived home. It was a neighbour advising me that it's too cold and too dangerous to leave her unsupervised outside. I explained that I can see her and she's well wrapped up (full body vest, outfit on top plus jumper, double socks and full snow suit and hat) so she's fine but the neighbour kept saying I should take her inside. I politely declined and said I needed to get back to the other DC. She muttered about how I'll end up 'getting reported to someone'...!

AIBU to leave her outside?

OP posts:
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MrsDeVere · 15/02/2016 09:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Washediris · 15/02/2016 09:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ReginaBlitz · 15/02/2016 09:11

No it's freezing especially for a baby that can't move much. It's laziness bring her in and put her to sleep properly or just bring the buggy In. Plus it's still not 100 percent safe to leave a baby out. Strange.

FelicityFunknickle · 15/02/2016 09:11

wash
That is probably why many people semsibly have a preference for prams which afford facing the baby while walking.

Natsku · 15/02/2016 09:13

ReginaBlitz Its not freezing if baby is wrapped up properly. My baby slept outside at -20 (and colder probably) well wrapped up in sleepsuit, snowsuit, sleeping bag and blanket on a sheepskin. She was always lovely and warm (easily checked by touching the back of their neck).

ReginaBlitz · 15/02/2016 09:13

And the cat thing is an old wife's tale.

ReginaBlitz · 15/02/2016 09:14

Nat it's still not really the point why would you want to leave your baby outside when you are inside I couldn't.

Pipbin · 15/02/2016 09:16

Plus it's still not 100 percent safe to leave a baby out.

It's not 100% safe to leave a baby anywhere though.

eddielizzard · 15/02/2016 09:19

fine.

you're supposed to sleep in a cold bedroom.

Washediris · 15/02/2016 09:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

merseyside · 15/02/2016 09:22

I did this, but I made sure I kept an ear out most of the time

It's healthy.

Poor pasty faced babies who aren't getting enough cold air SadWink

Woodhill · 15/02/2016 09:23

I think it is fine. I used to leave dc in pram sleeping outside but mainly in Summer

FelicityFunknickle · 15/02/2016 09:23

Many babies sleep better on their tummies.
Most of us in our 40s plus did so.
But research has shown us that one of the single most significant factors that reduced the risk of SIDS was placing babies on their backs to sleep.
The lullaby trust recommends a n ambient temp of somewhere around 16-18degrees.

FelicityFunknickle · 15/02/2016 09:24

Babies are absolutely not very clever at controlling their own body temperatures.

OnceMoreIntoTheBleach · 15/02/2016 09:26

Some people on here are just down right nasty. We all have our own set of fears or things that make us nervous when it comes to our children and our actions and decision making. Why do some of you think it's ok to openly laugh and take the piss out of people for having different views to you?

I wonder if I met you in a playground and you saw me hovering under the climbing frame while you sat on a bench the other side of the park nattering with your friends, would you openly laugh and bitch about the fact that I was more nervous for my child than you are? Would you point and stare and giggle with your friends? I doubt it. You probably save all that unacceptable behaviour until you can do anonymously on here, because you do in fact know that this kind of attitude towards fellow humans does, in fact, suck.

zoemaguire · 15/02/2016 09:27

It isn't laziness, it's choice!!!

Often I read threads and think what sane people mumsnetters are. But sometimes I feel like I've walked into a parallel universe. This isnt just different perspectives on a potentially risky decision, it is one side that has totally useless risk assessment. Nobody has yet pointed me to a single case where a baby has come to harm while sleeping, well wrapped up, in an enclosed garden. Not a single, solitary case!

OnceMoreIntoTheBleach · 15/02/2016 09:27

Not aimed at most recent posts, btw.

DeeLite · 15/02/2016 09:27

I leave my DD sleeping out the back in her buggy while I sit inside the window working on my computer in a silent room. She's just outside and I'm just inside. I think it's good for her to get fresh air and Vitamin D at this time of year when both are in short supply.

I am outraged that a social worker would think this would warrant a visit. Don't they have better things to do with their time?

merseyside · 15/02/2016 09:28

Having an opinion on other people's parenting choices doesn't suck.

If I saw you nervously hovering at the playground I'd probably wonder at the sheer amount of energy you were expending compared to me sitting drinking a cup of coffee...

blindsider · 15/02/2016 09:31

Reading some of these comments you would imagine that the OP lives in Aleppo. Frankly with Britain being such a dangerous place it is a source of constant wonder that people manage to live long enough to breed...

Is there enough cotton wool in the world to keep us all safe? - Jeez

OnceMoreIntoTheBleach · 15/02/2016 09:31

Having an opinion isn't a problem, no. That's what the OP asked for. But read back through the thread. There are some hideous posts and piss-takes about the foxes comment and the SW comment.

We don't all have to agree, but the rudeness aimed at people really does suck. There are better ways of expressing an opinion.

zoemaguire · 15/02/2016 09:31

Oncemore, it isn't about laughing at others for being more risk averse, it is attempting to justify the decision by appeal to rationality, and telling others that they are taking unnecessary risks. God we all have our insanity about our own babies. Mine had a breathing monitor until I darent tell you how old. And I'm still nervous about my 7yo having bits of string longer than 10cm Blush. The difference is that I know I'm being ridiculous, and I certainly wouldn't try to tell others they are being lazy or foolish for not acting like me.

DickDewy · 15/02/2016 09:34

I wouldn't fancy sleeping outside in the winter, so wouldn't leave a baby outside.

I used to leave mine to sleep in the back garden - in the summer.

merseyside · 15/02/2016 09:35

The insinuation that the less risk averse parents are sloppy and putting their children at risk is far more offensive than a few hmm faces about unrealistic fox related baby kidnappings....

OnceMoreIntoTheBleach · 15/02/2016 09:40

Zoe and mersey, I agree with you, but you've articulated it in a way that I would have no problem discussing and probably laughing with you about if I met you in RL. I know I'd be better off not hovering. I just find it hard not to think of worst-case scenarios sometimes, and that's just me, not saying I'm right or wrong in that. Each to their own. But I would hope that in RL I would not be openly berated for it in the same way as happens on here, that's all.

Some up thread have expressed their difference of opinion in a totally bitchy way that I find just hideous.

Anyway, enough said from me. I guess MN will always have those few. I just find it horrible. That's my opinion, expressed as best I can.