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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To bin my sisters cheap non stick saucepans and buy her some new ones

42 replies

mpje · 10/02/2016 08:27

She has some awful non stick saucepans where half of the non stick has come away and she still uses them. This can't be good for her or her family right? Will be eating bits of plastic in everything she cooks no doubt.

I want to just order her some new ones and tell her to bin the ones she has. Would it be cheeky to buy her these? www.amazon.co.uk/Circulon-Infinite-Hard-Anodised-Cookware/dp/B0018S13MM/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1455092547&sr=8-2&keywords=anolon+saucepans

I've offered to buy her some and she's said oh no she's fine with hers, but I would still like to.

OP posts:
Flossyfloof · 10/02/2016 08:28

Buy them for you and give her your old ones?

Flossyfloof · 10/02/2016 08:28

Whether or not you are being u depends on your relationship with her, I suppose.

HolsW · 10/02/2016 08:29

I'd do it for my sister, but put the others away in the cupboard, if she isn't happy, have the new ones and sorted!

Borninthe60s · 10/02/2016 08:30

No, you've offered and she's refused.

HolsW · 10/02/2016 08:32

Oh, yeah, she did refuse... I probably wouldn't then

Naoko · 10/02/2016 08:35

Those are lovely pans but I'd hate it if someone bought me those - they're so nice but I can't use them, that kind is too heavy. I recently replaced all my pans with cheap non stick ones and it's a revelation, so light and easy to handle. Once the non stick layer goes, as it will, I'll just replace them.

I think you're lovely and coming from a good place but don't just decide to bin her stuff and decree what she's using instead. I'd hate that and feel really patronised. Why not make sure she knows why scratched non stick is bad for you, and then leave her alone? (and tell her that your offer to buy her a new set - of her choice? - stands).

BrandNewAndImproved · 10/02/2016 08:40

Are you supposed to replace non stick when the non stick starts coming away?

mpje · 10/02/2016 08:43

Your right, she did refuse.

I've ordered them to my address they do seem like a great price for the brand and quality, I will happen to accidentally leave one behind at hers and see if she likes it.

OP posts:
Eva50 · 10/02/2016 08:43

If you are my sister then yes, please go ahead. I had no hope of tossing a pancake yesterday, it was more of a scrape it of the bottom. I would mention it again to her but if she refuses there's not much you can do.

AppleSetsSail · 10/02/2016 08:43

It's kind of overstepping the mark, but this is what sisters do in my experience. If you feel that strongly about it then do it.

AnthonyPandy · 10/02/2016 08:46

www.ikea.com/gb/en/catalog/products/00286413/

I would buy something like this. Much cheaper, plain and basic stainless steel, indestructible and she may feel more inclined to accept if she knows you have not spent so much. I have these, I've had them years and they are in perfect condition.

PurpleDaisies · 10/02/2016 08:51

I think you're really sweet but if my sister did this after I'd told her not to I'd be a bit pissed off and think she was being patronising. The plan of "accidentally" leaving one behind is a good one-we bought new knives after using some actual sharp ones and realising how crap ours were.

JennyBunn · 10/02/2016 08:58

Ooh, I bought those Circulon pans in a Black Friday deal and they are BRILLIANT!

thecatsarecrazy · 10/02/2016 09:03

Depends what she's like I guess. If my brother offered to buy me an expensive saucepan set I would say ta very much. He can afford it I cant.

ArmfulOfRoses · 10/02/2016 09:05

How do you accidentally leave a saucepan at someone's house?
If I had a random pan left at mine, I wouldn't use it, just put it away til I saw the owner again.

Marniasmum · 10/02/2016 09:08

I've offered to buy her some and she's said oh no she's fine with hers

what part of 'no' don't you understand?

Only1scoop · 10/02/2016 09:12

Yep

So easy to leave a saucepan at someone's house when I've been popping round for a cuppa

Do it all the time

MarthaMonkeynuts · 10/02/2016 09:14

It's a bit controlling and manipulative if she's already said no.
Tell her why you'd like to gift her some, suggest she can choose her own, if she declines then butt out.
I'd be annoyed if my sister tried to manipulate me this way. Be upfront and be prepared to take no for an answer.

Bogeyface · 10/02/2016 09:17

You asked, she said no, end of discussion.

Ordering them anyway then "accidentally" leaving one with her to use just smacks of "I know best!" and is incredibly patronising.

At best all you can do now is say that you had already ordered them, is she sure that she doesnt want them? And if not, then send them back.

Are you significantly better off than her? It could be that she feels like the poor relative and doesnt want your charity.

Whatever the reason, you need to accept that she doesnt want the pans.

Sgtmajormummy · 10/02/2016 09:24

Birthday present (along with something a bit more special). Sorted.

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 10/02/2016 09:26

www.goodhousekeeping.com/cooking-tools/cookware-reviews/a17426/nonstick-cookware-safety-facts/

This is interesting particularly about the high temperatures. I agree with a PP though - get cheap replacements. Even the good stuff only lasts 3-5 years glares at the crap Le Creuset

Jux · 10/02/2016 09:30

JennyBun me too!!! Brilliant pans, love them. Not too heavy either. I have ms and am very weak, but I can handle them - except the really big frying pan with a lid, which I have to use both hands for when it's empty; they use them on MasterChef, and if I see them I annoy everyone by shouting out "they've got my pans!!!!!". It's a bit of a family joke now. They are showing some wear now, and I have my eye on some Prestige stainless steel.

FP239 · 10/02/2016 09:31

Even normal non stick/teflon pans are toxic, never mind when the non stick layer is damaged and corroded. The chemicals it gives off must be horrendous. Did you know that you cant use teflon in a house with pet birds? the invisible fumes they give off are carcinogenic.

www.goodhousekeeping.com/cooking-tools/cookware-reviews/a17426/nonstick-cookware-safety-facts/

Gobbolino6 · 10/02/2016 09:31

I absolutely wouldn't do it if she's said no.

AnUtterIdiot · 10/02/2016 09:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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