to think ex-husband should report it to me when his son texts extremely abusive language about me?

[supadoula]

I have just come upon a very abusive text on my DS's (aged 10) phone. He wrote to his dad that I was a piece of sh*t....
Not only did his dad not report this to me, he didn't send anything back to say this was not acceptable.
We separated 18 months ago. I did everything so that they could see their dad every day (moved nearby, etc...). I don't believe this is acceptable behaviour from ex-H and it certainly is not from my son either. I want my DS to respect women - his mum and his sister especially. He has been aggressive at times towards his sister and myself. What can I do to make both of them see that they are crossing the line?

The attitude displayed by some here is far more unhealthy than the behaviour of this child.

The attitude of ownership and domineering control freakery directed at children will cause these people problems.

Op asked if her ex should report it to her when her ds uses extremely abusive language about her.

He did it by text. He might have emailed or phoned or spoken face to face.
This isn't about internet safety or whether parents should monitor a 10 yr old's phone.

The point is whether ds should be able to have private conversations with his dad, or whether the dad should tell his mum what he says about her.

Obviously, parents should not undermine each other or allow ds to use abusive language about the other parent. But does the RP have the right to listen in on phone calls or supervise Skype? Should Op tell her ex if DS sounds off about his dad to her?

What do you mean "attitude of ownership and domineering control freakery" lord?

I think you answered your own question bitch.

How's that what

The attitude of ownership and domineering control freakery directed at children will cause these people problems.

Do you ever say ANYTHING remotely sensible? Christ, Brightside.

Thank god that - with a few exceptions - the parents on this thread have their heads screwed on right.

By the way, for those easily confused, there's "sounding off" about a parent ("mum is mean because she wouldn't let me play on my x-box until 2am") and being rude and disrespectful to the people who put a roof over your entitled little head ("mum is a piece of shit").

Well said goodnightdarthvader1

Honestly, I think some people argue on here JUST to be contrary.

I don't doubt it goodnight

Nasty.

Sadly, hissy, Mr Brightside has daughters, I believe. Which is unfortunate, given that he has pretty highly misogynistic attitudes (and also, bizarre attitudes about parental "control", it would appear). When his daughters are texting their friends about what a sexist "piece of shit" their dad is, I wonder if he'll be so quick to berate other parents for trying to raise decent, well-balanced children.

Wonder if brightside is OP's ex.

I'm sure he stalked her on another thread a year or two ago

Indeed Brightside very much so.

I stand by my opinion, and you know I'm right ...