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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to restrict screen time and not believe the DC can self regulate?

66 replies

FabFlo · 30/01/2016 19:07

To limit the time dds spend in front of screens?

Dh says they should learn to self regulate and they won't be able to do that if I impose restrictions.

I want to have Wednesdays as no screen day - including TV. And also restrict the tablet to half an hour a day.

What do you do re. screens?

DC are 8 & 5

OP posts:
kimlo · 30/01/2016 19:11

The dds have free access when we are at home. I dont want to turn it in to a big thing.

Katenka · 30/01/2016 19:12

I suppose my kids self regulate.

They are almost 5 and almost 12z

The oldest has her own laptop and the youngest has access to the iPad. I don't have to drag either of them away from them and both prefer to be out of the house.

Never seen the need to ban to either. Again neither of them would sit in just watching it all day. Today is the forest day in ages we haven't had plans. To was on and both of them got their drawing stuff out and spent the afternoon drawing then we watched a movie.

I never planned to let them self regulate. It just worked out like that. They don't argue when I tell them we are going out and to put them down.

They argue about other stuff, but not tablets, computers or the TV.

Katenka · 30/01/2016 19:12

God there are so many typos in that. Apologies.Blush

MrsJayy · 30/01/2016 19:14

Why do you want to restrict screens ? Will you and your husband not use screens on a Wednesday that means no internet or TV when they go to bed I never understand the no screens thing if the kids are not busy what harm is there in an hour or 2 after school

PeggyBlomquist · 30/01/2016 19:14

Dd is 8 and she is allowed 55 minutes a day of a screen whether it is TV or kindle or infinity. She sort of self regulates as in when she sits down to play she twists the kitchen timer and switches off the screen at the bell.
Having said that she is mostly a very good child and of her two best friends one does it the exact same way as us and the other has to be physically removed from the screen. I have seen it happen and he is a long a way from self regulating. I definitely don't think a 5year old could do it.

Original poster
FabFlo · 30/01/2016 19:14

Mine don'the argue and would rather be out than in.

However the 5yo would quite happily spend all her time on it when she is indoors.

I don't worry about my 8yo so much, she does lots of activities after school and will put it down after a bit and find something else to do.

OP posts:
bibbitybobbityyhat · 30/01/2016 19:15

Yanbu. It is a rare child of 5 who can self regulate on anything! Do they need to have screens (other than tv) at all at 5 and 8?

GabiSolis · 30/01/2016 19:15

What are they like with screens at the moment?

Katenka · 30/01/2016 19:15

Kids have lots of stuff they don't 'need'

MrsJayy · 30/01/2016 19:17

Least if they are playing games on a tablet they are playing

Cat2014 · 30/01/2016 19:17

Ds is allowed screens when he likes as long as he comes off when asked with no fuss. However he does loads of activities after school and at weekends so his actual free time at home is rare. Therefore I don't mind it but if he was spending hours every day on screens I'd have to rethink.

bibbitybobbityyhat · 30/01/2016 19:18

Yes, far too much.

Katenka · 30/01/2016 19:20

Far too much what?

Kids don't need TV either.

Should kids only be allowed the very minimum only this they need?

bibbitybobbityyhat · 30/01/2016 19:22

Far too much stuff, as you said! I'm not going to argue with you Katenka so you can stop prodding.

Seriouslyffs · 30/01/2016 19:22

I thank my lucky stars that screens weren't so ubiquitous and that we were late adopters. If one more bloody thing to parent and no, I don't think a certain type me self regulates ever.

IAmPissedOffWithAHeadmaster · 30/01/2016 19:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SaucyJack · 30/01/2016 19:24

We don't have an official policy here, but if the DCs are getting a bit glassy-eyed or they haven't done much productive that eve, then I bellow at them to get off the bloody computer and go and tidy their bedroom up.

Girlfriend36 · 30/01/2016 19:25

Yanbu, my dd would not self regulate and would quite happily sit in front of a screen all day! I have always imposed limits on how much the tv is on and she has only just been allowed a tablet at nearly 10yo. At the moment it is about an hour a day max but usually slightly more at the wend.

Chrysanthemum5 · 30/01/2016 19:25

The DCs have a timer which is set to an hour. They can watch tv, or use the Xbox when they like but for a max of an hour (a bit more at weekends). We were at the opticians recently, and she was telling me that there has been a huge increase in the number of children with eye problems which have been caused by too much screen time. The latest NHS guidance on screen time is pretty strict.

I think like all these things, sometimes we have to help children make healthy choices. It's about balancing between being over controlling, and being responsible. Some screen time is great, too much can cause issues.

IAmPissedOffWithAHeadmaster · 30/01/2016 19:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Artandco · 30/01/2016 19:27

4 and 6 year olds.

They have no regular use of tv or tablets at home ( we don't actually own a tv or tablets)

But recently started letting them use our laptops for school project research ( about once a month)

I don't think it's needed. Dh and I watch no tv either. As they grow I'm sure they will need more access for work.

LadyLuck81 · 30/01/2016 19:34

My 4 year old has free access to tv/iPad. Some days she watches a lot other days she spends all her time role playing, colouring, running around outside.

Like others said before if she couldn't / wouldn't come of for was incapable of doing something else I'd feel differently I guess.

intothebreach · 30/01/2016 19:39

I'm having this debate with myself at the moment. I've just deregistered ds1 from school to home educate him, and he has spent four hours this afternoon watching stampy cat minecraft videos on YouTube.

I don't want to make screens a forbidden pleasure, but I also don't want him to get so sucked in that he forgets how to play and learn on his own. I have no particular problem with stampy cat, the boy is a genius and all that, very responsible and educational, but I do worry that ds1 will never learn to self regulate. Maybe I need to give it more time. ..

I banned screens yesterday, just as an experiment, and the boys really played together, which was lovely. I found that, as a single parent, I found it hard not to be able to use the screen as a babysitter while I showered and cooked and all that.

Not sure this is comparable, but when ds1 was about three, he was always asking for sweets, and I tried to restrict his access to them. One day, I gave up, handed him a whole family bag of haribo, and said he could eat as much as he wanted. He ate loads, felt sick, and hasn't touched the stuff since.

Still, screens are weirdly addictive. .. It's such a difficult decision, isn't it?

Katenka · 30/01/2016 19:40

Far too much stuff, as you said! I'm not going to argue with you Katenka so you can stop prodding.

Not prodding, having a discussion you said kids don't need screens 'other than a TV'

I responded that kids don't only have things they need. I never said kids have too much stuff and if you are cutting out everything but what they need you can include the tv in that.

If you don't want a discussion that's fine. But don't start accusing people of prodding.

MrsJayy · 30/01/2016 19:41

Taking tablets putting TV off when you have something else to do is normal no need for special names or restrictions for it just take it off them if you think they have had enough

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