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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Cats and newborns

51 replies

Cnmorgan13 · 28/01/2016 12:19

Not strictly AIBU but really looking for advice. I'm 35 weeks pregnant with my first child. I have 2 ragdoll house cats. My concern is sleeping. Generally both cats sleep with me and DH at night. One cat in particular is very cuddly. Obviously I'm worried about what to do when baby is here. We are attempting to lock them downstairs to get used to not sleeping upstairs, of which one cat has adjusted fine. But my cuddly cat meows and stratches the carpet (of which she's began to destroy) we have manuvered a cat post behind the close when it closes at night. Which has now resulted in her banging the door. After about a week she mostly bangs/meows about an hour before we're due to get up.
I have never heard of a cat smothering a baby but safety is paramount. We have also been playing 'baby crying sound effects' for the cats to get used to. My non cuddly cat reacts to this by charging to the noise to see what the problem is. Is she now going to start going mental when she hears baby cry at night and is locked downstairs.
Any advise welcome!

OP posts:

ridemesideways · 28/01/2016 13:23

My indoor cat slept far away from baby on the bed. As we were co-sleeping I would have been aware of any furry intrusion into baby's sleeping space. I'd go with whatever you can do to give you a quiet life. It's not unsafe to have a cat in the room with baby.

Elfontheedge · 28/01/2016 13:23

I don't think thre has ever been a recorded instance of a cat smothering a baby. They usually fuck off as far as possible away from the smelly, noisy, unpredictable things. that's my experience anyway.

nellyflora · 28/01/2016 13:41

We have a Birman and have had 3 newborns with him. He has always slept on our bed, just as far away as possible from the basket with baby in it. Basically he just avoids baby's he showed some interest with DC1 but quickly decided to keep away. I don't know anyone who has actually had a problem with cats and babies when the baby arrives but hear constant worry pre birth. good luck x

Booboostwo · 28/01/2016 13:53

Some cats do like sleeping on babies, our certainly tried to do this every time I looked away, so I think you are right to be aware of this risk. Feliway may help your cats relax and adjust to the newcomer.

catsrus · 28/01/2016 14:10

Evidence please for any baby being smothered by a cat?? Surely there must be some strong scientific evidence for everyone to get so worked up about it?

I had 4 cats when my DC were babies, one of the cats positively liked babies and would share my lap with them while they were being bf. The cats continued to sleep on the bed. I am a scientist, I take evidence seriously, I Never saw any convincing evidence that would have caused me to exclude the cats from the bedroom.

nellyflora · 28/01/2016 16:02

I did some research before DS1 and came across no evidence or cases of smothering ( although I would assume that would always be a risk). I have read research supporting benefits to immune system of children born into homes with pets. I think common sense with cats and babies applies you discourage the cat from sitting on new born and baby things and when the cat discovers babys will grab at fir they soon keep away. Dlus generally cats don't like wriggly screaming things. My cat would lie next to baby on my lap whilst I breast fed but avoided contact any other time, and would not be seen for dust when the screaming was in full flow. By baby 3 he gave her a sniff glared at us and exited by the cat flap with tail in air in discust.

GloGirl · 28/01/2016 16:08

Firstly a moses basket is likely to last about 3 months, not 6 so do plan around that. A crib such as a Snuz Pod will last longer, the sides are deeper and it is bigger altogether.

I have a house cat, he still sleeps with us and my new mum anxiety did go a bit mad for the first few days in case baby got smothered.

I set chair/beds etc up early and sprayed with essential oils that cats hate (a spray from pets at home and not on the mattress just on the surround. I lined thr mattresses with tin foil which cats are supposed to hate landing on.

I only let the cat go in the room where the mattress and chair was when I was there so I could 'scare ' him if it looked like he was trying to jump in.

By the time the baby was born the cat was quite happy and he never fussed with the baby or his furniture.

KC225 · 28/01/2016 16:13

I have three cats thay were a year old when my twins were born. I remember my husband calling me in the hospital to tell me the cat net wasn't going to work. He took a video of the cats launching themselves from our bed onto to the net and using it like a trampoline. When he took it down they were not interested.

One thing me cats loved was those vibrating rocker chairs. Health Visitor came once, kids were asleep in the bedroom, the rocker chairs were on full vibrate in the living room with a cat in each. Glad they got some use, babies hated those chairs.

I agree the cats steered clear of the babies. Too noisy, too smelly. Now my twins are 8 the same cats sit on their laps, sleep on their beds. It's quite lovely.

Caterina99 · 28/01/2016 16:42

I have a house cat. She was also v interested in those baby crying recordings, but the actual baby not so much! She mostly keeps an eye on DS (now 7 months so mobile and grabby) from a safe distance. She did try and get in cot etc before he was born, but I sprayed her with water to discourage her. She has never ventured it since he was born. She does try and steal his toys though, but he thinks that's hillarious!

MissBattleaxe · 28/01/2016 16:45

My cat couldn't have been less interested in our baby. She avoided him like the plague and wasn't a problem at all.

Original poster

Cnmorgan13 · 28/01/2016 17:08

Thanks everyone for the advice! I think the myth of cats smothering babies came from the whole witches familiar thing, trying to 'steel the babies breath/soul' then to smelling the milk on the breath to plain old sitting on the baby. The door to the babies room will be closed when it's in the cot.

OP posts:

Sandsnake · 28/01/2016 18:10

Both of our cats weren't as bothered as we thought when we brought DS home. The girl cat likes to lick his hair at the back of his head like she's grooming her own kitten, which is cute if somewhat unhygienic. The boy cat has taken to not really liking him very much, which is understandable as he had colic and screamed an awful lot for the first ten weeks or so (he's only 12 weeks now). One night we were trying to calm a screaming DS in bed - boy cat jumped up walked over to DS and meowed SO loudly at him whilst showing him his teeth. He's a very placid cat but I think he'd just had enough of him - he reminded me of Scar from the Lion King.

Feeches · 28/01/2016 18:27

Both my cats stayed well clear of my dd. She's 17 weeks now and it's only recently they've come closer but still maintain a cautious distance. They both run like fuck when she starts crying. The smell the milk thing is a load of bollocks.

I think it's only sensible though to supervise any animals around babies. As such, my cats no longer have access to our bedroom or the nursery. We made them a safe place downstairs with a massive cat tree and comfy bedding such as radiator beds. They're quite content now.

hollinhurst84 · 28/01/2016 18:36

My friend has two Siamese. One ignores child completely. The other is obsessed with her and trails round after her, lets child dress her up, cuddles up to her

TheHauntedFishtank · 28/01/2016 19:53

at the cats in the vibrating rockers. Mine avoided the baby and cot/pram etc when he was in it. He's 2.7 now and one of the cats is still avoiding him but the others have worked out that he is an excellent source of food scraps.

StarlingMurmuration · 28/01/2016 20:21

One of our cats is very interested in DS and has been since he was born 14 months ago. The other is indifferent. DS slept in a crib at the side of our bed until he was old enough to go in a cot in his own room - when he was in with us, we didn't keep cats out, and when he moved into his won room, we just made sure the cats were never allowed into his room, whether or not he was there. It's worked out fine.

StarlingMurmuration · 28/01/2016 20:24

Also, just FYI - it's unlikely your baby will stay in a Moses basket til he's six months old. Most babies grow out of them by three months or even earlier. DS was too big for his by six weeks, so we moved him into a crib.

Original poster

Cnmorgan13 · 28/01/2016 21:19

Lol prego brain I must've got mixed up with BF

OP posts:

NightWanderer · 28/01/2016 22:08

It really depends on the cat. I think my cat used to see the baby as a lovely milky smelling hot water bottle. She also used to lie next to her and lick her little bald head. Even now, when she's breast feeding the cat comes over for a good sniff.

Smothering is extremely rare but there have been suspected cases, if you google.

www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1379196/Sleeping-cat-suffocates-baby.html

www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/family-cat-may-have-suffocated-baby-girl-121373

www.thelocal.se/20091110/23180

Wolfiefan · 28/01/2016 22:14

One of my favourite photos ever. We lost this old girl last year aged 19.
This was what she did when DS came home. She just had a look. Always scarpered the moment he made a noise. We co slept for a bit and then he went in his own room. I always shut the cats out of whatever room he was in.
You are absolutely doing the right thing by getting cats ready to the changes before the baby arrives. Suddenly coming home with a newborn and shutting them out isn't a great idea (in fact when I was little my mum did just that. Our Burmese rebelled in the stinkiest way possible!)
I wouldn't worry too much about the baby noise. Perhaps they are freaked by the sound seeming disembodied!!

Wolfiefan · 28/01/2016 22:14

Sorry re read. Shut them out of where he was sleeping only.

glamourousgranny42 · 28/01/2016 22:41

With both my babies and grandbaby I made sure that moses basket, cot, bouncy chair etc were around before the birth. If the cats tried to get in they were scolded (sprayed with water). They kept away, particularly if there was noise!! But they did sleep next to the babies in a protective sort of way.

putthePuffindown · 28/01/2016 22:47

We had to shut ours in the living room and found jamming a little wad of tissue in the door when we closed it for the night solved the banging. Sorry can't help much on the rest as she passed away before dd arrived.

Jelliebabe1 · 28/01/2016 23:10

My poor boy didn't know what to make of our twin girls (although we've never let him sleep in with us) he kept WELL away from them for ages! It was weeks before he even looked into the Moses basket (downstairs during the day). He was quite stressed but were all fine now!

Sistedtwister · 29/01/2016 18:06

I filled the Moses basket with balloons before DD was born. One jumped in once. Never again

2 ran away and then studiously ignored once DD was here. The other adored DD. Growled whenever the other 2 went near her. Cleaned her head regularly and would put her face against DDs and purr when she cried

Ironically she was my Velcro cat and the one I was most worried about, she hated everyone but me, but she treated DD like one of her own.

This was the cat that knew I was pregnant before I did. I tested too early and negative because of the way she was behaving. I do miss her

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