That consultant said this word...

[Ozwizard]

I went to the hospital to see my results from my consultant. Result of this is that I will have to have surgery that has a six to eight week recovery time. As he was explaining my condition he said that it is very common in " Negroid ladies"!!
The nurse in the room looked at me and shifted uncomfortably in her seat! And I took a second to register if he really did say that. Then I did a nervous laugh and said to him " you must not use that word" he said "what, that is what you are" " what is wrong with Negroid"? I said " stop, use another word". He said " oh I didn't know that Negroid would offend you"
Aibu that he should not have said that word?

Sorry cross post.

Op: if I used that word or any other to describe racial origin and the patient said "I find that offensive" I would apologise profusely, explain that I meant no offense, that the word was used in X context and then I would use a less offensive to the patient word. I would then attempt to rebuild the rapport between myself and the patient.

To be dismissive is pretty bad bedside manner and poor practice.

"I think that if someone is speaking to you in a way that you find offensive, then it is offensive, (whether or not they meant to offend)"

No, I completely disagree with that. You could block communication completely with a patient going 'that word offends me' every two minutes. See my post above about some people liking every-day language and others liking clinical language. There has to be some justification for claiming to be offended (as the OP has in this case).

He said " oh I didn't know that Negroid would offend you"
Aibu that he should not have said that word?

I think it's perfectly clear even from these two sentences exactly what she meant flat

It seems as though you are going out of your way to be goady. So then you can answer my question is this your way of basically saying suck it up? Flat
No women wants to go through such a major op. It's a shock learning that from test results this is the next course of action. Behind this I hope that other women potentially facing such surgery can do so having been made to feel comfort from a consultant in what she is facing. Regardless of her skin colour.

"if I used that word or any other to describe racial origin and the patient said "I find that offensive" I would apologise profusely, explain that I meant no offense,"

You should apologise if you really did use an offensive word or if you weren't sure, but not if you didn't. Do you remember Jack Straw being told off by a woman on QT for saying Afro-Caribbean? She wanted him to say African Caribbean. He apologised to please her, but I don't see why he should have had to. As far as I know he was using the correct term at the time.

I'm sorry but bearing in mind the doctor's own ethnic origin if I were the OP I might be tempted if I meet him again to say "oh hello Bubble, you don't mind me calling that do you, it's how Cockneys, a sub culture of British society, refer to Greeks. "Bubble and Squeak". If he finds it offensive just say sorry mate, but if you can't take it, don't give it.

Not very cultured and I wouldn't actually do it but sauce for the goose and all that !

"flaying his arms in the air when I asked him to stop"

Again, different cultures use gesturing differently.

He is in a professional capacity and I doubt that he had learnt the word in medical school!

Oz YANBU. He shouldn't have said it. His an educated professional and will be fully aware of how offensive this word is/can be. The fact he even asked if you found the word offensive is patronising and makes the situation even more offensive.

For information I haven't RTFT. I got as far as this highlight "post " below and thought FFS I know how this is going to go. Can't be arsed to read the predictable posts so just responded to your op.

YABU if you couldn't offer him an alternative that no one else would find annoying.

Very common in black women / mixed race women / women of African descent. The possibilities are almost endless. Your preference will probably annoy someone else

OP
Having read your responses to any poster who states YABU why have you posted this in AIBU when clearly you don't think you are?

OP, I do fully support you but it is a scientific descriptor, as quite a few previous posters have explained, so he will absolutely have learned it in medical school and it is probably used in the academic papers that he read which conclude that the condition you have is more common in people of your ethnicity.

It IS different from Negro or the other N word. HOWEVER you have every right to be offended by it since it sounds so similar to those words, and the crucial thing is that he ignored your request that he refrain from using it.

I also think that he should have considered in advance that the word had potential to offend. For those making excuses about his language abilities- if his English is considered adequate to permit him to explain medical procedures, risks and outcomes to patients without an interpreter then he should easily have the linguistic ability to understand what words are offensive. It's not difficult (I speak a couple of languages less well than that and you pick these things up easily).

It IS different from Negro or the other N word

Genuine question, is negro not just a shortened version of negroid?

The term "Negroid" is still used in certain disciplines such as forensic and physical anthropology.[3] In a medical context, some scholars have recommended that the term Negroid be avoided in scientific writings because of its association with scientific racism.[28] This mirrors the decline in usage of the term Negro, which fell out of favor following the campaigns of the American civil rights movement

Nope I'm wrong seems like they're two different words just from the same root.

OP, YANBU and I'm sorry you're having to deal with this in addition to your health problems.

The next time someone on here claims that people take racism more seriously than sexism. I will point them to this thread, which is chockful of minimising and derailing.

What part of OP's post leads anyone to think that wah-wahing about racism against white people and discussions about Welsh history (!) are relevant?

OP: I went to Google Scholar, and searched for occurrences of the word combination "gynecology Negroid" used since 2012. The first reference that came up were for medical research performed in the University of Nigeria teaching hospital by someone called P. Nkwo,published in 2013. There are plenty of other articles as well using the term. Like I said, the word is used in medicine in other countries, although I suspect not so much here. You can verify this for yourself if you wish.

"Flaying his arms in the air"
Thats how greeks, turks, spanish, italian etc express themselves.
Again, an over reaction to someone who is clearly not English.

OP I'm shocked that so many people are telling you that you shouldn't have had a problem with his using this term.

YANBU!

My mistake that the word is in fact taught in medical school in academic papers. It just took me a back as personally I have not come across this word to my face before

OP
^He also said that he is letting me know that it's unfortunate for me that if I was to meet MrWright who would treat me like a princess, take me out and buy me nice things fall in love together that

Say WHAT!!! I'd be about the negroid comments but I'd be about the Mr Right comments.

I actually find it hard to believe he used those actual words. What a dinosaur.

I think you should send a letter to the hospital and explain what happened. Make sure you mention the name of the nurse if you have it,

In South Africa it's normal to use the terms black, white and coloured. 'Coloured' is used in government publications and is not considered offensive.

I just avoid ever referring to anyone's race, it's much safer.

Nice generalisation and stereotyping there Flat