To ask desperately what really worked for you with fear of flying?

[hippowithsuncreen]

I have flown several times. It terrifies me. I need to know what really worked for you.

Only going to the Channel Islands but had a panic attack last time

1. British Airways Flying with Confidence course
2. breathing exercises learnt in 1.
3. G&T
4. Always telling the cabin crew when I get on board. I sometimes get to have a little chat on the flight deck and nearly always get support from the crew, checking I'm OK (& doubling the free gin allowance) and letting me stand and chat in the galley when they're not busy. BA best for this TLC, Aer Lingus not so much!

Travel Scrabble. Sounds stupid but if I focus all my thoughts on the game I can't worry about anything else.
I find short flights (and smaller planes) harder than long flights in big planes.

I work in aviation, currently for a major UK carrier.

My usual advice to nervous flyers is to watch the cabin crew carefully. Observe their behaviour, interactions and body language.

Do they look scared? Worried? Stressed? Or do they seem relaxed, just getting on with their work as usual on another normal day at the 'office'?

Are they chatting normally between themselves like you do with your colleagues? When the safety demo is done and the cabin is secure for take-off, do they look worried? Or do they just sit there waiting calmly until it's time to get on with the service?

When service is done do they just relax and chill out, maybe chatting or reading?

If anything was wrong with the aircraft, the crew would probably be aware of it, so if they are just getting on with work as usual, you can be fairly sure there is nothing to worry about.

You are in more danger while driving to the airport than when flying, so relax.

I read this book.

I re-read parts of it a few days before I fly and again parts before take off. I do the recommended breathing exercises at take off.

I have also told air stewards and they usually tell me when we are going to hit turbulence. When I know it's expected and IS turbulence I'm not as scared.

I don't have fear of flying, but beta blockers (propranolol) work brilliantly for my phobia of public speaking.

Oenophilia When I told the airline upon arrival at airport that I was scared of flying they refused to put my luggage on the plane despite me having my three children and my parents with me and me being insistent that I would be flying. My luggage was added just before take off... They were anything but understand even though I was visibly shaken...

Learning about how planes worked and what all the noises you hear on board mean. Still don't enjoy flying especially take off but it is bearable.

Diazepam. Shit loads of the stuff. It's great.

Lexotan. Take as prescribed - it stops the anxiety taking off. Brilliant stuff.

Doh forgot to put the link in my post
www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B00B5TBI8I?ie=UTF8&redirectFromSS=1&pc_redir=T1&noEncodingTag=1&fp=1

Beer helps, without doubt.

bonnief that's dreadful advice! As a nervous flyer observing the crew is the worst. Every time one of them speaks on intercom and even slightly frowns I panic that they've heard bad news.

Actually I agree with Bonnief; I have found it comforting to observe the crews' matter-of-fact manner.

My friend is terrified of flying, she flies maybe once or twice a year and her GP gives her a prescription of 4 valium each time. Does the job and is not enough for her to develop a tolerance or dependency.

I used to be fine with flying but have got worse over the years

The thing that massively helped me was a documentary about people that had a fear of flying. They were crying, sweating, worrying and looking so ridiculous compared to everyone else who was so relaxed and enjoying the flight and landing safely, that I just thought YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS and that was about it. It really helped me seeing someone else freaking out when logically I knew there was nothing to worry about. I'll see if I can find it, it might help someone

Citalopram in general for anxiety and wine on the day.

Dh was horrified I ordered a wine pre 12 on an internal flight in the UK.

Also, on a thread that's about fear of flying scare stories are NOT HELPFUL

Pleased refrain!

Valium is a godsend. 3 valium tablets, 3 double G&Ts and I'm super happy.

Prior to that I would freak out every single time I flew.

Glen Harrold and Valium.

Something that's always helped me is that when a plane flies over my head, and I'm on the ground, I never think it's going to fall on me.

Allen carrs book helped me enormously.

I always recall the 'turbulence is like a car on cobble stones' bit midair and it calms me.

CBT (cognitive behaviour therapy) has cured me of a 15 year fear of flying. 4 sessions was all it took to change the way I think about flying and I have just done a 14 hour fight with turbulence with no problem.

The basic thinking process is: just because I feel scared does not mean I'm not safe.

Think about flying now......you feel scared. But look around you. You are at home on MN. It was just a thought that caused you to be scared. The thought did not make you unsafe. It's the same on a plane. You have thoughts that scare you but at the same time other people are going about their business and the plane is flying along quite safely.

I had a thread on here a while ago when I was posting from a plane during turbulence and I was completely shitting myself. I will try to find the link. I simply don't feel that way anymore thanks to CBT. Best £400 I ever spent.

Thank you. Will definately look for both those books.
Can you still function enough to look after the kids on valium?

I used to be fine. On and off planes all the time. Pop a pill and sleep as much as possible. I understand the physics and the stats and didn't give a hoot when I was young, free and single.
I had dc and my hitherto comedy anxiety became a thing and remains a thing. I have had to fly since and I just about coped. I'm OK in the air. I cannot contemplate taking the DC on a plane.

Diazepam and tell the crew - they'll give a heads up about turbulence etc and keep checking in with you. Also will move you from bad seat if they can in general I find.

But mostly diazepam. Honestly just no point in trying to be brave or a martyr. It works.

I function fine on it.

I hate flying too.
My brother is a pilot and I had him explain to me how planes actually fly so I do feel slightly better about it now but not much. He told me to imagine the plane in the sky sitting on a 'shelf' as it flies along.

I guess putting a brave face on for DD helps me get through it but inside I'm still shitting myself.