to ask if you would consider home education?

[SundayBea]

Have read a lot of articles recently on how the numbers in home education have 'exploded' and it's on the rise by 80% a year apparently. I know of three families I think quite highly of, two of whom are ex-teachers whose children have never been to school and their children seem to be having an exceptional upbringing and education with so many fantastic experiences and opportunities. Also know of two other families who have withdrawn their children from school because of problems with their respective schools and I'm less certain of how successful it is going to be for them. Also know of several colleagues and DH's cousin who have DC under 5 who are debating not registering them when the time comes. Is this a big thing now or is it just coincidence I know of so many families like this? I was just wondering what the general consensus was.. when I mentioned socialisation one of my ex-teacher friends showed me the Facebook group she is in for her local home education community and I was amazed at the plethora of groups, classes, meet ups and outings with hundreds of members.. just for her local county! Have been debating with DP what to do about schooling at private school is unfortunately out of the question on our current salaries.. I'm now feeling like I've discovered a whole new option I hadn't considered? Sorry if this is rambling, only getting a 5 minute lunch break today!

Teachers don't share their resources with HE parents regardless of involvement with LEA

Some of the most active HE parents are ex teachers and very good at it, yes. They're also useful to others because they have the best of both worlds.

fresh Please don't be misled by thinking your experience is the norm. Experiences like that do happen but parents count themselves very fortunate. A difficult experience is unfortunately very common.

I still don't think a 'quite obvious' chat over tea and cake is going to accomplish much, especially when children in schools are considered to need a million and one tests to gauge their progress. it seems very subjective and open to prejudice.

It's very rare to come across a home educator who gets support and resources from their EHE officer, and those who do are extremely lucky to live where they are. That said, people move on, and there are countless cases of home educators losing friendly and supportive officers who are replaced by deeply unpleasant, anti-HE bods who don't know the law and whose purpose is to dismiss provision so they can force children back into schools. That's a surprisingly common scenario.

Some LAs (mine included) will give no support whatsoever, even where there are SN issues. I lost count of the number of people I approached, right up to Director level, to access specific SN support for my son as was his legal right, but was told tough, you've made your choice and now you're on your own. Even though LAs have a duty to support children known to have SN in their area. This too is very common. Those who have supportive LAs, with education and other resources they are prepared to share, are woefully rare.

Most of the letters they send you inviting themselves to have a meeting with you in your home implying it's obligatory even caution you that they will do nothing other than asses the provision and they won't assist with anything else

*The first is that we can't get him to do homework so don't anticpate we would be able to get him to do school work at home.

The second is that we want him to learn that he can get through things that are difficult by sticking at them, something that he's not good at.

The third is that we want to encourage some independence from us. That he forms good relationships outside of our family.*

I can identify with all of these. Hence why I think a more structured approach to HE such as using Wolsey Hall or Interhigh would work for us, at least for 1 and 2.

Regarding independence, I think children who have lots of positive contact with home and parents AND lots of varied opportunities to strike out on their own(as HE kids do) is likely to try their wings more willingly than a child who is miserable and sees their home as a refuge from the big bad world.

This is illustrated by how many HE kids go on to successfully do exchanges and boarding school post HE.

Sure, teach children that stamina and resilience are important qualities but remember also that this will not happen if they are overwhelmed; the experience needs to be manageable for growth to occur. Also remember that the principle objective of school is learning and a very stressed, unhappy child is more likely to self-sabotage (and identify with being lazy and naughty) than learn. Children are still developing ways of overriding stress-they don't have the neurological wherewithal to keep a stiff upper lip as consistently as adults can. We also routinely expect children to put up with a degree of unpleasantness and happiness at school that we would probably not tolerate if we encountered it in the workplace ourselves, and we are more likely to attribute symptoms of stress and depression to a bad attitude or bad behaviour. Sometimes HE can seem like a miracle simply because it breaks that negative cycle, leaving a happier child more able to cope with a new school in the future.

Lost...exactly!

And to the poster who said they couldn't get their child to do homework. Think of a coke bottle. Going to school shakes it. Then they have an argument at play time. Shake a little more. Then there is a tricky maths test. Shake. Then they don't understand English. Shake. Then they drop their sandwich at lunch, fall out with a friend and get detention. Shake Shake Shake.

They get home and the lid is opened and they explode! They don't want to do work as they have had a bad day at school and the work reminds them it hasn't finished and they have to go back again tomorrow.

Now, take away all that shaking. Suddenly a child is not stressed about work. If the maths is tricky you have time to go over it again and again, and then again the next day because you don't have to keep the class moving and move into the next topic. If they get angry annoyed stressed anxious you can send them out to jump onthe trampoline, walk in the woods, throw paint at a sheet hanging on the line. They can decompress. And they return in a much better frame of mind to either continue or do another subject and come back to the maths later. One day they will get it. When they are ready. Not when the school tells them to be ready.

My ds love science. So he reads and reads and reads all shout it. He also spends a lot of the day experimenting. He hates writing. I could tell they had done a lot of writing when he came home by his behaviour. Today, we worked through his anxiety and anger and he wrote a 300 word piece! :)

I think that you misunderstand my posts- they are what I think should happen if HE was merely another choice. The inspector should be someone committed to HE who is open to all sorts of approaches and isn't expecting a mini school. There should be no testing (I would like it dropped in school too until the public exam stage). They would then be able to share equipment and resources with schools.
I doubt it will happen, other than little pockets like my friend.
The set up should be that parents are not left isolated and should have the friendly, enthusiastic LEA and not be able to refuse visits. Should be and not is.

lost

I totally agree with you in terms of independance.
Whilst our dd did have some teething problems joining school again, so did the others starting boarding for the first time. They were just slightly different ones.
E.g dd found it hard communicating with teachers as an authority as when she was H.ed she spoke to adults on the same level. She also found some organisation difficult, such as the timetable which doesn't work like normal schools.
She settled to boarding immediately, which tbh was our biggest fear. She even helped to settle those in her dorm who were homesick.

Thanks for the advice all. As a result of this thread I have opened a discussion with my DH about HE our DS. That doesn't mean we are going to do it but that we are now open to the possibility.

Unfortunately we can see the pitfalls all too well. We have an unmotivated child with zero concentration and several disabilities. Trying to motivate or teach our DS is the most stressful thing we do as a family. It is a real trigger point so we would only do if necessary.

We would supplement his education by bringing a teacher in for a couple of hours a day, which we have funding for (not in the UK) and would only do it if he lost his place in school, which could happen if his mental health continues to deteriorate.

at ten you need to keep your options open

Well, I will now admit that I didn't always think that there was a place for HE. I qualified as a teacher in 1977 and thought no parent could be as good as I was after 4 years of training.

Gladly, I am not the jumped-up-know-it-all-better-than-anyone-else I was at 22 years old.

I still think I was a great teacher though - and my progression through the education ladder proved it. But I trust parents now to make the very best decisions for their children within the context of education. I am not talking about the parent who doesn't wake up in a morning, so the child(ren) don't get to school at all. But those parents who make a conscious decision to HE are not choosing an easy option at all. It is child-centred learning and talents/opportunities are recognised.

The 10yr old child I spoke about in an earlier post speaks Mandarin confidently (not in the family culture/background) because of his contact with another HE parent. Who would have known that the 10yr old had an ability to learn non-European languages? I do think that this 10year old has had his opportunities expanded rather than curtailed.

Universities ARE recognising that possible candidates can be judged/assessed by factors and traits that are not dependent on GCSE/A Level achievement.

"Universities ARE recognising that possible candidates can be judged/assessed by factors and traits that are not dependent on GCSE/A Level achievement."

But less than they did- there is far less scope than there used to be. Please don't let people go away with the idea that GCSEs and A levels aren't necessary for university entrance. In all but the most exceptional cases, they are.

That's so misleading, Bertrand. What about Access courses, NVQs, BTECs, APL, portfolios? Or simply A levels not taken in school or not taken at 18?

BertrandRussell You are so wrong that I can't even write a sentence it describe it!

In my retirement years, I am invited back to Universities I have worked with to be the 3rd interviewer. We look for individuality, work experience, quick thinking, compassion. We no longer look for GCSEs and A Levels as the main factor in judging a candidate's future capability.

For anyone reading this thread whilst considering HE - and wondering about your child's application to a University:

1. Writing to the university early on and establishing an interest in a course or field of study asking about their attitude towards an application from a home educated young person will often yield very good results.

1. 'Portfolios' of work and experience is extremely useful, and you cannot begin the 'record of evidence' too soon.

1. Link with groups where research and analysis is a factor - e.g. bird-watching, hedgehogs, early-blooming fruit bushes, erosion of the coast, conservation of the planet/animals.

1. Teach your child how to capture evidence (recording) and then discuss with others who hold another opinion (critical thinking). This evidence can be recorded in a picture/drawing of something they see.

1. Enable your child to deal with 'set-backs' because others think differently. That doesn't mean your child is always incorrect/ nor correct, but will encourage your child to re-think about how s/he puts a point across. You have to handle disappointment, frustration, too-big-for-their-boots at this stage.

1. Communication skills are paramount throughout. But speech is not the essential nor only means of communication.

HTH

That's a really informative post sadwidow. Thanks

Yes of course it's possible. And there are other options. But there is sometimes an attitude on here that you can rock up to a highly sought after university with your portfolio and have as good a chance of a place as the kid with 4 A levels. And it's just not true. It's such a bad idea to close doors to kids that they may not even know yet that they want to go through. And of course there are reasons why some kids won't do GCSEs at the same time as their peers- but if you can then it's sooooo much easier!

"We no longer look for GCSEs and A Levels as the main factor in judging a candidate's future capability."

I'm pretty sure they still do in most universities...

Surely an invitee to a university interview round must already have ticked all the minimum ALevel expected grades and Gsces, plus suitable personal statement. I used to recruit onto Univ. courses too and we screened out the unsuitable candidates at ucas application form stage.

You are assuming an application to a course where they still interview.

Most these days (if they are a selecting course) do so as a paper exercise driven by grades.

Yep so most likely it'll now be an admissions admin bod (NOT the admitting department's academics) who puts you on the yay or nay pile based entirely on your ucas form. So yes, down mainly to grades.

My local uni which by all accounts is highly sought after has removed the betec nvq route for a particular course I know of. Screened out before interview.

people with academic grades have individuality, quick thinking, compassion, and work experience too. They just have grades as well.

Universities are changing the way they think about candidates with alternative qualifications

"In the complete absence of A-levels or equivalent qualifications, some universities are even prepared to accept life and work experience as an alternative to formal education."

But for the more traditional routes to professional careers, I certainly wouldn't recommend HE without GCSEs/ALevels

"Generally speaking, most universities expect at least a grade C in English, maths and – sometimes – science. If your child hopes to work as a nurse or primary school teacher all three are essential, while the former two are needed to teach at secondary level or be a social worker.

Ds is 12 and has aspergers, was bullied very badly in year 7 and after the school let him down so badly by not doing anything I removed him.
My intention was to apply/appeal for school choice one and this took months and we lost anyway.
Life got in the way, we didn't do much at all and I knew home schooling just wasn't for us, he also needed the social aspect as well as the routine and structure.
Found a new school ( never on my list but has good friends there and an excellent pastoral centre ) and he is happy, still have niggles ovev the new school as it's not got the best reputation but my son isn't being bullied there and actually wants to get up of a morning and go. Hats off to those who do home school.