to ask someone to move their child out of my plane seat

[kipperssippers]

more of a WWYD then AIBU but...
i booked the seat by the window as i always do and when i got to my seat a child around 8 was in my seat with her mum beside her.
When i got there i told the mother that the window seat is my seat and she said her child wanted the window seat to look out, i then replied then you should of booked one.
I didnt want to cause a scene but the women made out i'm an arsehole for asking her kid to move as she had never been on a flight and wanted to look outside.
I did give in and stayed pissed off for 7 hours in my non window seat.

what would you of done in this situation?

Cats, answer this from MaidOfStars:

People have outlined several reasons why they might pay to choose a specific seat (window or aisle). For example:

1. They prefer it.
2. They will be able to sleep.
3. They will be sick unless they sit there (and seven hours of puking is not "an inconvenience").
4. They will suffer a panic attack unless they sit there (I used to have severe anxiety on a flight - there's NO WAY I'd have been separated from my now husband).
5. They need to be able to move freely or otherwise be in pain.

Do you think a child's joy trumps ALL of those?

You keep ignoring this. Answer it.

I have seen amazing views from planes but most of the time, particularly if you cannot sit high as the windows are above shoulder level, it's clouds.

I often look out of the window and it amazes me how little other people do. I would insist on the seat for me because I know I would take advantage of it.

And, of course, it needs to be daylight where you are.

It's not always about a child's joy. An adult may have never flown before. An adult may have been having a very hard time and be really relishing the peace and tranquility of looking at the clouds for a couple of hours. The adult may want to sleep in peace. The adult may be on the way home to a funeral (happened in our family recently) and want to cry in peace). The aduilt may have a fear of flying. May have a need to stretch legs a certain way and need that extra couple of cm the window space allows. May just have felt like treating themselves instead of looking after every other bloody person in their lives for a small period while they travel.

There are just soooooo many reasons why an adult may want the window seat. Many of which have nothing to do with squashing a child's joy.

Is it REALLY fair to EXPECT that adult, particularly a woman on her own, to suck it up and change, particularly when she was organized enough to make arrangements for what she wanted/needed to happen in advance, just because a child wants to look out the window.

Sorry, but some opf the posters on this thread are making me unreasonably mad with their expectations. I don't subscribe to "children should be seen and not heard" but I DO subscribe to everyone being reasonably equal and if someone has organized something for themselves, they are entitled to follow through on it. For THEMSELVES!!!!

Cats Because My Joy takes precedence over some random Child's Joy any day!

"Do you not think that's horrible?"

I agree wholeheartedly with you that it is horrible. As it happens my little treasure wants the 'Joy of an iPhone 6'. I have no intention of getting it for him, 'cos like plane mummy, I watch my own pocket and obviously can get others to pony up for his Joy. We could arrange a western Union transfer as his Joy takes precedence over any Joy you should get out of your cash.

I'm sure you will put your money where your mouth is because you philosophy sounds so genuine and you couldn't possibly be just bull sh**ting?

You could even buy one for yourself, but as my kiddy's joy trumps your joy (even with something booked and paid for with your cash), I am confident you can arrange for it to be sent to him.

goodnight

1. yes
2. yes
3. no, that's understandable
4. no, again understandable
5. no but they could let the child sit there for take off

My point is that if someone's just insisting on it to be awkward which it seems like that's unfair. Disability is obviously different

You've just outed yourself in a way cats stating those countries where you think they're more considerate than us.

France generally 'non' well not in Paris anyway, countryside trains yes they'd probably move.... Bordeaux trams not a chance in hell! The Irish can also be a bit either way.... On the dart they may or may not move depending on times (see that can be a commuter train). Spain and Italy I've mostly driven not taken public transport much.

pangurban1 well done on taking what i said amazingly out of context

You don't have a fifty inch telly, do you? He has given signals that would bring him much joy. And as he is a kiddy, he trumps others possession. But I am speaking to the converted and indeed an genuine practitioner of this philosophy. Don't send it Yodel, though. His joy could be shattered along with the 50inch screen, if it was chucked over the side gate!

He'd like Hermes. Thanks in advance.

Got it. So sleep is not a good excuse. On a longhaul we're not allowed to sleep if a child wants our seat. We have to put up with endless loo trips, being woken etc. Even though we might be straight off to a business meeting on leaving the airport when we arrive.

Open your mind a bit Cats. Life isn't black and white.

is that if someone's just insisting on it to be awkward which it seems like that's unfair.

Points 1 and 2 aren't "to be awkward". They are perfectly valid reasons for pissing all over "a child's joy".

You sound very very young.

goodnight it's not acceptable to upset a child because "I want it" in my opinion

You sound very very young.

She also sounds like someone who has never worked.

If I'm on my own I'd be happy to give my seat to a child flying for the first time. If the mother was rude and obnoxious then I'd be livid but it probably wouldn't have got to that point as I would have just sat in the aisle seat anyway.

What is horrible is putting your child's joy above everyone jesses and teaching that child that's how their life will be.

Big big mistake. Huge.

Poor poor kid.

Will either end up in prison or a bloody psychopath.

Or travelled. Or commuted. Or caught many planes. Or trains.

I was thinking on the train thread, and agree now, that Cats sounds very young. Still int he black/white stage of everything, not seeing the nuances and grey areas...

goodnight it's not acceptable to upset a child because "I want it" in my opinion

Upsetting a child because "I want it" would have been OP turfing child out of child's pre booked seat because OP wanted to gaze out the window.

Obviously not the case here.

So a child saying i want it just gets it whatever it is and whoever it belongs to.

Unhinged.

shock horror a child should ever be upset. Or not get what they want when they want it!

So, TheCatsMeow - having finally answered darthvader's question - what about mine?

How is it thoughtful, caring, saintly, helpful, etc to leave your buggy in the lobby of a train where people would have to climb over it - because that's what you said you would do, if a seat became available, and you couldn't collapse your pram. You said clearly that you wouldn't mind people climbing over it, but have repeatedly ignored my question about whether it is reasonable or sensible to expect other passengers to put themselves at risk by climbing over your buggy!!

Lea I'm young (mid twenties) and I don't think like Cat!

More stereotyping. There are friendly and unfriendly people in all those countries.

I'm quite young!

Play your cards right and Cats might be stumping up on a window seat ticket for you all the way to one of those child tolerant countries.