to think this is a stupid theme for a party?

[BrokenVag]

Invited to a party for an adult's birthday next month. Theme is "James Bond - Dress to Thrill".

We are a stocky bloke, curvy overweight brunette woman and 5 year old child. How the fuff do we do Bond?!

[Sparklingbrook]

It's a way of keeping numbers down.

[NewLife4Me]

I managed a function like this many years ago.
The guests had a great time and everybody loved it, but really no expense was spared as my budget, on behalf of my client was enormous.
There were all sorts of characters that have been in Bond movies throughout time.
It was one of the best events I did, honestly.

If you do a search you'll find loads of ideas, all the women weren't Bond girls by any stretch of imagination.

[Iammostseriouslydispleased]

You can be really creative with this sort of thing in a very simple way. I once went as a Bond car (!) googled the colours and themes of it (say it is black and silver - black dress and shoes, silver belt (you could put some headlamp shapes on) print out the aston martin logo and pin to your dress.

Or go as one the title / theme song - gold / world is not enough - have the baby as the world!

Die another day - have a calender with lots of dates crossed out!

another very simple one is to go as Boris "I am invincible!" from the Brosnan film - he was a geek so simple everyday costume - maybe some glasses and with a clicky pen is the crucial thing. Simplest costume ever!

[MuttonDressedAsMutton]

Fancy dress parties are a special circle of hell in my opinion . Good for you, the people who love them - but not everyone does! I wouldn't go - politely decline the invite and stay home painting your ears or knitting your toe hair - anything is preferable to dressing up!

[bettyberry]

Dress the 5 yo as Bond, you go as a bond villain and the OH as a stocky Bond girl. Blonde wig for added effect.

[Ackvavit]

Lovely black dress you are comfortable in. Paint one finger gold.

[TiggyD]

Naked and painted gold.

[Osolea]

Just do black tie, suit and a fancy dress. I'd have thought James Bond has git to be the easiest theme possible to dress for, and I don't think I've ever watched a whole JB theme from start to finish.

[WelliesTheyAreWonderful]

Dress up as a cat, stuff four pairs of tights and staple them to your waist, et voila, we have Octopussy. DH gets to be Adele. And DS in a suit.

[lorelei9]

I hate fancy dress but I went to one of these as Odd Job because it amused me and meant flat shoes!

[lorelei9]

Mutton, now I'm dying to turn down an invite saying I'm knitting toe hair, brilliant.

[SixtyFootDoll]

Oh lord I hate fancy dress

[AlisonWunderland]

Rosa Klebb?

[Soooosie]

Fancy dress shop. Or get DH to just wear speedos and wet look hair gel

[satine]

Sorry if I'm repeating someone else's idea, but Spectre has an amazing opening section set in Mexico City on their Day of the Dead festival. all you need is a Day of the Dead mask, a flowered headband, red lipstick and a pretty dress and you're there! You can find lots of masks and headbands on Amazon, EBay etc if you search "Day of the Dead fancy dress".
Good luck!

[BackforGood]

I hate fancy dress, but, as 'themes' go, it is fairly easy. Just put on something beautiful and you can be anyone from any of the casinos, and other black tie events he goes to.

[JellyTotCat]

A doctor's outfit with a big No on the front?
A cat mask with octopus legs pinned around your top?

[BYOSnowman]

dress your 5yo as a builder with a builders helmet - he will be 'generic henchman'

i'm sure any fancy dress he has can be incorporated - police, fire medical etc definitely

[Leeds2]

I wouldn't go!

Yes, I am miserable!

[Sneakyweasel]

There are some great suggestions here so far, I'm loving pussy galore & Dr. No. Went to a Bond theme party years ago with my husband and we were skint so I dressed as a henchman (vest top, army shirt & combats) and he dressed as James Bond from Die Another Day (hawaiin shirt, chinos & a cigar). It ended up being a great night and lots of my friends just wore a nice party dress and went as Bond girls.

[MuttonDressedAsMutton]

Do it lorelei Guarenteed silent but slightly embarrassed acceptance. People just don't want to go there!

[Autumn2014]

I don't like fancy dress.so.I'd just go as something generic James bond theme but wearing real clothes. Black tie suit for your husband, you could hire it.and a nice evening dress in a style that flatters your figure and accessories to make you feel glamorous. Your son could be anything he wants to be I'm sure as he is only five. I'd just let him pick something he already has from his dress up box like a cow boy or Disney character even if it's not James bond.

[FlatOnTheHill]

Fekking hate fancy bloody dress. I feel for you OP. Its such a load of time and effort and probable expensive. I would not go

[FlatOnTheHill]

JellytotCat
Omfg im crying here

[hownottofuckup]

Please go naked painted gold.

Or just wear what you like and paint one finger gold