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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be pissed off and definitely ungrateful

53 replies

ZadokTheBeastie · 26/12/2015 21:32

that my MIL buys my kids second-hand clothes from ebay for Christmas? She's not hard up, by the way. In that she can afford 4 holidays a year and a packet of fags every day. Is it me?

OP posts:
thelaundryfairy · 26/12/2015 21:33

Maybe she thinks it´s not worth buying children expensive brand new clothes as they grow out of them? And that she is doing you a favour by buying them clothes?

SeoulSista · 26/12/2015 21:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FairyFluffbum · 26/12/2015 21:36

Oh you are being so unreasonable. Why does your child need brand new clothes anyway?
She's helping by buying you clothes your child can play in.
Just because she has money doesn't mean you are entitled to it

Junosmum · 26/12/2015 21:36

All my stuff for my baby is second hand off eBay and I'm happy for others to buy second hand stuff for baby too.

OHs Christmas present was second hand off eBay this year as well. So I think you are being unreasonable (we could afford brand new if we wanted) but I can also understand why you don't like it.

Original poster
ZadokTheBeastie · 26/12/2015 21:37

Mmmm. it's not good stuff to begin with - eg multipack of Primark t-shirts.

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 26/12/2015 21:39

You have to love some of the replies on MN.

Original poster
ZadokTheBeastie · 26/12/2015 21:41

Fairy I don't need her money! Seriously. And I wouldn't mind if she decided she only wanted to spend a fiver or something on them. But I think even for that you could get something nicer/more thoughtful than a bunch of second hand tshirts, especially for their Christmas presents.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 26/12/2015 21:43

So she's not good at present buying, but the thought is there?

Smile, nod and don't worry about it.

Sunbeam1112 · 26/12/2015 21:44

Why would she buy second clothes,where clothes are fairly cheap these days. My auntie has habit of trying to buy second toys and occasionally clothes. I refuse as she knows my feelings. DK are part of a big family so never go short so don't need extra toys and clothing. I always having to have a clear out. I would politely say you rather have new.

Sunbeam1112 · 26/12/2015 21:46

BTW you're not being unreasonable. Its your choice if you want you're DC in secondhand clothing. Seems an odd thing to buy for christmas.

ImperialBlether · 26/12/2015 21:55

But Worra, what IS the thought? That the OP and her family should be grateful for anything at all?

toopeoply · 26/12/2015 21:57

I don't mind 2nd hand if it's good quality. And was expensive originally. But nit 2nd hand primark t shirts. How did you know that they were 2nd hand?

Danglyweed · 26/12/2015 21:58

Hmm im in two minds on this one. I do sometimes buy my girls jeans on ebay, but for a good reason I.E my dd7 was prem and is short, but kinda normal waist size, trousers are impossible, so find a brand and stick to it. But im really not sure Id want my mum to do the same. She buys them anything and bloody everything off ebay to do with their latest fad, but clothes hmm? Yeah on the fence

QueenArseClangers · 26/12/2015 21:59

Do they stink of fags?

Danglyweed · 26/12/2015 22:00

sunbeam expense is surely individual, fairly cheap to you maybe!

Original poster
ZadokTheBeastie · 26/12/2015 22:01

toopeoply because she told me.

OP posts:
Sunbeam1112 · 26/12/2015 22:02

There is no thought. Clothes are so cheap. I picked all sorts of clothes in tesco,asda in the sales. I actually prefer to dress my own kids and don't see any wrong in it. I grew up with hand me downs so in a way it makes me want to get new and we are able to do it. In regards to buying others second hand its OK if you chose to buy second hand for yourself but doesn't mean others should accept it.

Sunbeam1112 · 26/12/2015 22:05

Danglyweed tesco I got tops £3 jumper £6 coat £10 even a onesy 50p new. There's some really good deals sometimes cheaper than charity shops.

ShamefulPlaceMarker · 26/12/2015 22:06

How weird to buy primark off ebay! I bet with postage it was more expensive (or close to) than buying from shop!
I buy 2nd hand clothes all the time off ebay for dc, but only good quality stuff that I can't afford irl.
Ds's main present this yr was a 2nd hand bike off ebay too.
So yabu if you're disgusted by her buying 2nd hand. But yanbu to be miffed at what it was she bought

ImperialBlether · 26/12/2015 22:10

But Shameful, a secondhand bike is absolutely fine - a lovely gift. A secondhand Primark tee-shirt is completely different.

ghostspirit · 26/12/2015 22:13

some people get nothing....

Original poster
ZadokTheBeastie · 26/12/2015 22:15

Shameful no - I don't have a problem with second hand stuff generally, in principle, I just think it's cheap and tight to be going to this extent to save money on stuff that wouldn't have been more than a few quid new. I mean, I would never even consider buying a relative or friend's child some random second-hand stuff like that. I'd rather get them some colouring pencils or a nice notebook, something like that, if I only had a few pounds.

OP posts:
Inertia · 26/12/2015 22:17

Embrace your Mil's thrift and buy her second -hand clothes from eBay for her next birthday, she's sure to be thrilled that you are on board.

BoomBoomsCousin · 26/12/2015 22:23

Despite the facts that one shouldn't expect gifts, that many people have no grandparents, that many who have grandparents still don't get better gifts and that people can give what they wis, I too would be pissed and ungrateful if my mother went on four holidays a year but bought her granddaughter secondhand primary T-shirts. If everything else about her was a loving grandmother I probably wouldn't really notice. But that's not how it is, is it? I'm guessing here, but I would be prepared to put (a small amount of) money on it that she is stingy in many ways and this is just the most seasonal example? No one wants their parents to be stingy to their children. But it does no good to get bitter about it.

BoomBoomsCousin · 26/12/2015 22:24

*Primark not primary (just the worst of several typos and autocorrects).