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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be a bit jealous of other people's Christmas days?!

54 replies

Zola1980 · 26/12/2015 17:49

Ours was just a bit dull. Nice lunch round parents and a game of monopoly, but judging by everyone else on FB they all seem to have a riot!

We've only got immediate family (me, DH, DPs and nan) and had a few glasses of wine but no one is the 'get pissed' sort so feel a bit of a lush by keeping drinking. It was just a bit dull and was glad when it was late enough to take myself off to bed!

Anyone else have a slightly dull day?! Definitely considering going away next year!

OP posts:

pinkmagic1 · 26/12/2015 18:37

I have never had facebook and don't intend to. Had a lovely relaxed Christmas, just me, DH, kids and my mum. Watched kids open their presents and then went out for dinner at an all you can eat buffet place. Visited my dad in the afternoon for an hour or so and then just went home and chilled in front of the tele.
We all work full time and it is just nice to relax and spend quality time together. Bet half these people that have these perfect looking Christmases are stressed up to the eyeballs.

5Hearts · 26/12/2015 18:38

If you're really having a great time...you probably aren't thinking of facebook.

We we're at a Christmas event recently...best bit was taking the mick out of DH for taking pics for FB. Looked like we had an amazing family time... . We didn't.

5Hearts · 26/12/2015 18:39

sorry just were

almondpudding · 26/12/2015 18:48

Things I am jealous of on this thread...

Someone has five kids.
Someone lives close enough to their mother to see them every week
Someone has still living grandparents.

There is always someone who has something you don't have! Such is life.

Also, often people put photos on FB because they can't be with extended family and it is a way of sharing photos. It isn't to boast!

usual · 26/12/2015 18:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheoriginalLEM · 26/12/2015 18:53

I am envious of your Christmas OP, well a bit, because mine was similar but i couldnt think of anything worse than a "big family Christmas"

LaLyra · 26/12/2015 19:00

We had a relatively dull day (as dull as you can get with 19 people), but it was great.

We went away. The cottages aren't quite as shiny as the photos, but they are comfortable and warm and the ovens are great so that was fine. Yesterday the kids were up early, opened their presents, I had a minor panic about burning something, we all laughed at the fact MIL and I got our wires crossed so there was shit loads of carrots and no sprouts, we all ate dinner, a few laughs, one oops moment with a trifle when some got spilled then we split into our own cottages (we're in 3). In ours we played cards for a while then folks fell asleep in front of the tv and the kids went to bed relatively early because they were up early.

So much better than previous drama filled years with someone falling out with someone, no-one got hammered and it was just nice. Not fancy, not anything major, just quiet and nice. Dull isn't always a bad thing imo.

thelaundryfairy · 26/12/2015 19:02

Perfectlypurple, I love your advice, "They say 'don't compare your behind the scenes with everyone else's highlight reel." I´m going to remember that one in future.

We had a lovely Christmas Day and were too busy enjoying each other´s company and laughing to take photos of ourselves to upload to social media. I appreciate some people have relatives far away who they want to share their Christmasses with via social media and I do not judge anyone for how they choose to celebrate or not celebrate. Our Christmas wasn´t much to tell anyone about (turkey, presents, Trivial Pursuit), but we enjoyed it and were grateful to all have the time off of work to spend together.

Don´t waste time feeling envious of others.

coffeeisnectar · 26/12/2015 19:12

One of my fb friends posted several videos and over 150 photos in an album of her "perfect wee kiddies" which means,she spent half the day behind her phone. And as they weren't at home she didn't have to cook either. But this is a person who does colour schemes, gets a new sofa every year and has already posted a picture of a huge house, tagging her husband in saying he needs to buy them it. On fb her world appears perfect. I'm very good friends with her mil and know different!!

We were at home, four of us. Food, presents, few drinks. No games and no riotous behaviour. It was lovely.

Olddear · 26/12/2015 19:14

Lovely day with family. Lovely meal, couple of drinks and a good chinwag. By FB standards would look very dull but hey ho....we enjoyed being together.

aquashiv · 26/12/2015 19:21

No one is going to put a picture of them selves with facing like slapped arses now are they? Or post a status update saying having a right old boring bollox of a Christmas.
It is the equivalent of being asked how are you. and saying oh fine thanks, despite the fact your hamster has died and husband has hoofed off with the the butcher.
We dont drink and had a lovely day with arguments and board games.

Original poster

Zola1980 · 26/12/2015 19:24

Thanks all for putting it into perspective! I know some people have it much worse off and I should be grateful.

OP posts:

Geraniumred · 26/12/2015 21:42

Stay away from Facebook. I assume that the perfect Christmas pictures on there are to share with other members of the same family who weren't there, rather than to make anyone jealous. People have such high expectations of the day, but it can go in any direction and you just have to deal with whatever happens and try to stay calm and enjoy at least bits of it.

StuffandBother · 26/12/2015 21:49

I know exactly what you mean, I had a pang of jealousy at everyone with their massive families having Fun Fun Fun, whilst perfectly lovely spent with my lovely family my Christmas Day wasn't Fun x3!

CerseiHeartsJaime4ever · 26/12/2015 21:53

Some of the christmas's on FB look like hell tbh. Too much alcohol, food fights, kids with more presents than they know what to do with, everyone trying so desperately hard to look like they are loving it big time.

I don't feel envy when I look at FB. I mostly feel glad I'm me!

CerseiHeartsJaime4ever · 26/12/2015 21:54

Sorry to hear you had a seizure on Xmas day tywin

shebird · 26/12/2015 22:24

There is so much expectation that Christmas Day has to be this amazing picture perfect event. We were hosting Christmas this year and although I think everyone had a fab day, I'm bloody exhausted from cleaning, shopping, cooking and clearing up. I just feel deflated at the end of it, weeks of planning and hard work and it's all over in such a short time.

annandale · 26/12/2015 22:32

Christmas was nothing like as bad as I feared it might be - it was really very good - but man I'm glad it's over. Luckily the people I know who post a lot of fb pix aren't horrible at all, and as well as their lovely Christmas photos I know all about the awful illnesses, sudden deaths, relationship breakdowns etc that are only mentioned on FB. I will always feel sad whenever I see a picture of any family at all that has more than one child but that's hardly anyone else's fault!

I'd agree with planning a trip away next year, though I did this one year and although it was nice it just wasn't Christmas to me. I'd rather be bored at home!

summerdreams · 26/12/2015 23:15

Well my Christmas started on Christmas eve my mentally ill suicidal sister went missing and had to call the police. (Found her in the pub with a whisky). My 16 month old son wakes up with a temperature he has a rare condition that makes this dangerous I pick up a bucks fizz at 10 in the morning and have my first cigarette in years as I'm so worried dinner was burnt 68 year old nans friend found dead christmas day I spent most of my time trying keep an eye on my 1 year old my mum and sister have a massive row sister leaves before dinner I never even sat down and ate Christmas dinner, for the firSt time in my life as was so stressed and my son wouldn't sit at the table cos he was moany. If you see the pics I took we're all dressed up and smiling with lovely food on the side, drinks and presents but was my worse Christmas yet. Pictures are really easy to make things look lovely but keeping a hole day running smoothly is not.

Babytalkobsession · 26/12/2015 23:32

For me it's Boxing Day I'm jealous of. Yesterday was pretty good, spent it at home with DH family visiting. One of whom plays guitar very well and another couple are so lovely / extrovert types there was lots of energy / singing etc.

Today we went to my family - chaos of 17 people in an average sized house, kids over tired and over whelmed. Just so stressful.

Came home to hear of dbil and dsil's day of walk, pub, scrabble and wine and felt unbelievably jealous. They are so happy, and just always have a good time. Feel like a miserable cow in comparison.

Tired with a demanding toddler & 3 months pregnant though so find it hard to summon the energy!

Enkopkaffetak · 26/12/2015 23:32

You know op Your Christmas to me sounds far better than many of the " getting pissed and 22 for dinner" Pictures I have seen on Facebook ( I would say no to monopoly I cant abide it - we have had great fun with Dixie and Logo game though)

Just time wit those you love and who are close with. No need for loads of alcohol and no need for pretending it was fabulous. Just life as it is with those who you care about.

Pretty perfect in my eyes

BackforGood · 26/12/2015 23:43

Yup. YABU.
Sounds really nice to have parents and a Nan still around to be able to share your day.
Sounds nice to have a lovely quiet day without drama.
You do know the vast majority of people eat dinner together and then sit around and watch tele together, don't you ? It's just most of us don't feel the need to post on social media about doing that.

eastwest · 26/12/2015 23:45

Ours was dull too, don't worry :)

toffeeboffin · 27/12/2015 02:00

Mine was very dull and boring. You are not alone.

thebestfurchinchilla · 27/12/2015 09:27

summerdream I feel for you. Hope the new year is good to you

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