to think that people see loneliness as an old peoples problrm

[TartanBirdFeeder]

I'm watching the itv programme about people who are lonely, it's awful that so many old people are lonely but there is little recognition or provision for the middle aged lonely who have nobody other than their children and are largely housebound due to lack of cash and confidence. People should stop to think of the invisible lonely who have nothing.

Salt and Tartan I admire you holidaying alone, I would not do this now I'm on my own, good on you's though. Luckily I enjoy my own company rather than being with others, I can't be bothered to force this any more, so very rarely socialise which suits me. I find friends are more trouble than they're worth most of the time, would rather be friends with the cat. And do you know, that's fine with me, it's no ones business but mine. What's the point in socialising if it's forced, no point what so ever IMO.

arcticcactus I could have written your post, except am newly pregnant rather than on maternity. I also suffer from depression and anxiety and have recently lost my job due to this. Nobody knows any of this except my husband. So I feel extremely lonely and wonder how I got to this point really.
I don't know if it's a case of elderly people being more or less lonely. Or rather that people could perhaps be more aware of everyone in their community, not just the elderly.

I've just been dumped by another friend because they have found a new partner. It seems to be a vicious cycle. I seem to get a friend, think it is great, then bam, they are suddenly a 'we' and I'm no longer useful. It's particularly hurt this year, as I really went out of my way to help her, and now feel I was just some way of filling the void between boyfriends. She spent the whole year talking about taking me to a certain place on my birthday (I've never had a birthday party ever, or had anyone do anything special) and then a couple of days before she cancelled on me because the boyfriend wanted to go with her instead and she couldn't book an extra space for me.

I'm now just ready to give up on people altogether. I really don't know what's wrong with me that I'm so unlovable by anyone, and I might as well stop trying. It hurts too much when you're once again kicked in the guts.

Sorry to hear that Midnite. Some people can be so thoughtless.

I think people not only see it as an older people's problem but think that if you appear to be outgoing, capable and confident you can't be lonely.

I only have 2 living relatives and no family of my own.

None of my friends have been in touch over Christmas. I try my best all year to be a good friend but clearly no one gives a shit.

I'm in my 30s btw.

I live in an area with a lot of elderly folks. I'd say its not loneliness is a problem, but boredom. Not the generation to bother with technology, eyesight too poor to read, not good health to go places... Its very sad. And not sure what you can do for help.

Nataleejah - good point about boredom rather than loneliness. My grandmother is 89, still mobile but frail. If it wasn't for technology she'd be bored shitless and probably complaining of feeling lonely.
She got a computer about 15 yrs ago and went to free "internet lessons" at the library. Is on Facebook, has a smartphone, kindle fire and small kindle for books which is a real boon now her eyesight isn't v good as she can enlarge the print.
She does all her shopping on line and loves choosing presents for people at christmas and birthdays and the internet has helped her to feel included in everything. Its a shame more older people can't be encouraged to embrace technology.

The Internet can be a great help but I do think that it can emphasise how alone you are if you are always seeing photos of family gatherings and so on, especially if you add poverty into the mix and can't afford treats out.