AIBU to spend my money however I see fit?

[OublietteBravo]

My mother seems to believe this is totally unreasonable behaviour.

DH and I both work FT in demanding, but reasonably well paid jobs. We choose to spend our money on school fees, eating out and holidays.

My mother disapproves. Apparently it is unfair that I send DD and DS to private school, because my sister can't afford to send her DC

I shouldn't spend money on holidays because my house needs decorating. It is a bit shabby and granny-chic, but we're not bothered. At the moment we figure that DD and DS will appreciate the family time they get when we're out together or on holiday more than a beautifully decorated house. Besides, we really enjoy the down time away from work.

My mother lives 180 miles away, and hardly ever visits, so I really don't see that the state of my house is her concern (it is clean - we have a cleaner).

Every time I speak to her she brings this up ('have you started sorting the house out yet? It really needs doing.')

Aaaargh

Your mother is just being a typical mother of that generation. They have different priorities.

It is annoying but you will be probably be like that if your kids end up always decorating their house and never going on holidays.

Its not about the house or the private school really - its probably because she just wants to spend time on the phone with you and has absolutely nothing meaningful to say so she goes to default topic.

Having lost both of my parents (and both of them having opinions on every aspect of my life) -I wish I had a mum who even bothered to talk to me, even if it is to criticise!

So whilst you are NBU, just go with it, suffer through it - its just her being her - accept it. You will never change your mother. Love her as she is. You don't have to answer her silly questions - just say 'muuuum- will you ever shut up about it - I am not you!' - like you would have done as a teenager.
And do it every day, every time she says it, because she ALWAYS will. Its called love, its called family, and its called old age! Be grateful she calls and is around.

She expects you to pay for your nieces and nephews schooling totally gobsmacked.

My grandmother was a teacher then head teacher then school inspector - both my mum & aunt went to private school as it was far better than the one in their area, so I don't think her being a teacher gives her free reign to criticise your choice of school.

My mum is a bit like this. The living room 'needs redecorating soon' type, although don't think she would ever say it.

I do like decorating and do want to do it fairly often, when we moved into this house it took us four years to decorate our bedroom and it used to really get me down. I want to have a nice looking space to spend time in, as I spend most of my time there.

However, money is tight for us so it's a case of if we've got a spare £50 or so, we might spruce up an area with a tin of paint. We haven't ever had enough money for a real holiday as we are shocking at saving.

Me and DH were having a similar conversation the other day: re-do the bathroom or go on holiday?

Its a no-brainer really!

Your money, spend it on what you want.