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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Housing Benefit suspended:pay rent or do Christmas - can't do both!

380 replies

NoMoneyMona · 18/12/2015 14:00

I had to put in a claim for top up housing benefit as my job contract ended in October. DH works full time but rent is very high (£1200 for a 3 bed) and we have 3 DC.

I have been unable to find another job despite applying for at least 2/3 most days, as many want weekend workers/evenings, and DH works weekends/eves anyway so we would have no childcare.

HB started paying about 3 weeks later and shortly after that they sent a letter asking for more evidence and gave me a month to supply it. Part of the evidence requested was a new child tax credit award showing the new award since I stopped working as amount would increase. I still did not have a new award by the time the month was up (and I forgot to chase them) so I contacted HB the day after the month was up to explain.

They stated, quite correctly I agree, that I should have contacted them within the month they gave so they could give me more time and as I did not contact them, they had suspended my HB and it would 3/4 weeks to reinstate it. The next day, I got the award notice and took it in to them but they insisted that I would be at the back of the 'queue' and they may not get to my claim before Christmas so I may have to wait until January as they close from the 24th Dec to 4th Jan.

That was 3 weeks ago. We have not had any payments since 23rd November. DH got paid today and if we use that for rent next week (and direct debits, normal food), we will not have a penny left. I will have £50 in tax credits to come as well which will not cover many extras. I have not bought anything for DC as I kept putting if off hoping for the claim to be reinstated. When I rang today, they said I would be unlikely to get any money before the 11th January! We have no access to credit.

WWYD? Would I be unreasonable to keep back about half of the rent and pay the rest when the HB restarts which will cover the shortfall?

OP posts:
EnthusiasmDisturbed · 21/12/2015 20:19

Rent has to come first

I would ask if you could pay £200-£250 at a slightly late date

How can you afford to spend £600 on Christmas when you haven't got money for rent

I have only spent £200 I can't afford to spend anymore (£100 on ds) and certainly not getting in debt or missing paying bills to make Christmas magical I can do that just as well on a budget

EnthusiasmDisturbed · 21/12/2015 20:21

And being a landlord I am not in a position to cover my tenants financial problems. The rent pays the mortgage, insurance, homecare cover and ground rent

youmustbekidding · 21/12/2015 20:25

And your eventual outright ownership of the property, of course. It pays for that as well.

Kaytee1987 · 21/12/2015 20:26

Haven't read the full thread so someone may have already said this.
If it was your mortgage instead of your landlords that wasn't going to be paid would this even be a question?
Keeping a roof over your heads is far more important than Christmas presents and it's not fair that your landlord suffer because of this.
Christmas isn't meant to be about receiving lots of presents, maybe you could organise some games or activities with your children instead of presents? Make some small gifts, apply to the charities that give children gifts.
One Christmas when I was about 9 my dad had not long been made redundant, my parents had to return the presents they had bought us in order to pay the mortgage. It was explained to us and I don't remember being disappointed at all, had a great day with games etc. We still had a present each from our grandparents and some tenners in card's from aunts etc. My parents were able to buy us chocolates.
Op will your children receive one or two gifts from anyone else?
The £50 you talked about is enough for Christmas dinner and some selection boxes for the kids.

Bearbehind · 21/12/2015 20:32

Haven't read the full thread so someone may have already said this.

FFS- this will never cease to amaze on on Internet forums- what kind of arrogance do you possess to think that, after 15 pages of posts that you can't be arsed to read you stating the bleedin obvious is going to be new and revolutionary Hmm

Kaytee1987 · 21/12/2015 20:39

Um I gave a suggestion based on my own personal experience of a Christmas as a child.
The op asked if she was being unreasonable or not and people are free to give their answers, I don't see why mine is any less important than anyone else's. I don't have time to read all the pages but thought as something similar had happened to me as a child that the op might appreciate knowing my perspective.

Kaytee1987 · 21/12/2015 20:46

And it obviously isn't obvious to the op or she wouldn't have asked. I said someone might have already said it so hardly think my comment is 'new or revolutionary'. I just wanted to share my experiences with the op but apologies if I offended you bearbehind Hmm

Bearbehind · 21/12/2015 20:49

People are completely free to give their opinions, that's the joy of the Internet, but I will never understand the thought process behind basically saying, I can be arsed to read the more than 300 posts that came before me but I think.......

Kaytee1987 · 21/12/2015 20:55

Well my thought process was that I wanted to reply before my phone with 3% battery died and I stuck it on charge and couldn't find the thread again but didn't feel the need to explain all that in the first post.
I don't understand the thought process behind calling someone you've never met arrogant but each to their own.

Bearbehind · 21/12/2015 21:05

Your battery life would have been better spent reading the thread than checking for replies to your post.

muttonaslamb4 · 21/12/2015 21:09

Blimey it "never ceases to amaze me" how unpleasant people can be on internet forums (very brave of you, Bear, hiding behind your keyboard)
Guess it makes some folk feel better
And, just to go back to original question- OP is unreasonable...very.

Alfieisnoisy · 21/12/2015 21:10

To be fair all contributions are worthwhile if the OP is still even reading them.

All opinions help and overwhelmingly the OP has been told to prioritise her rent.

I said way back that I've been in a similar situation at Xmas and it's not nice to struggle when the rest of society seems to be revelling in excess. In my case the rent got paid and we had a very muted Christmas, thankfully with gifts from family plus a few small pressies for DS.

Everyone posting their opinion is adding to the decision the OP needs to make.

Bearbehind · 21/12/2015 21:19

I'm really not hiding behind my keyboard- it genuinely pisses me right off with Internet forums and I'm pretty vocal about it IRL too.

Actually what kaytee said was very relevant, but I truly don't understand what makes someone say 'I haven't read anything anyone else thinks, despite the fact the thread has been going for days, but here's my thoughts'.

It's all a bit by the by anyway as the OP is clearly not coming back. It seems increasingly likely she had made her decision before she even posted. With 3 shopping days until Christmas I very much doubt anything on here will change her plans.

EvaBING · 21/12/2015 21:40

It's not reasonable for a landlord to take the hit.

But it's reasonable for a family with 3 young kids to take the hit.

I totally do not get it.

Baconyum · 21/12/2015 21:50

As has been said multiple times we cannot possibly know the ll circumstances! They may also have young children, there may be disabilities to consider, they may (as one ll who posted does) have an elderly parent in care and the rental fees go towards that!

The OP cocked up why should the LL suffer?!

JessicaRuby · 21/12/2015 21:55

Eva

Its reasonable for the LL to take the hit for the OP's mistake (which she's admitted to)?

I totally do not get it.

Maisy313 · 21/12/2015 22:24

Leopardgecko your tenants are not paying for your mum's care, they are paying to live in your mums home. What you do with that money is absolutely none of anybodies business. I have every sympathy with you op and would be desperate to do anything to ensure my children had a Christmas, but not paying rent could damage you all far more than you expect later down the road, especially when it comes to finding a new let. Whatever you decide to do I hope it works out for you and your kids.

decisionsdecisions123 · 23/12/2015 01:01

If the housing had done as they are supposed to and requested the information straight from tax credits none of this waiting would have happened.

AndNowItsSeven · 23/12/2015 01:14

Bacon the op is having to pay her rent with tax credits etc that is meant fur food.

Iamnotloobrushphobic · 23/12/2015 07:49

seven but she isn't planning on spending most of the money on food, she is planning to spend it on Christmas presents so it doesn't really matter what the intention of tax credits are. Nobody who is unable to pay their rent should be blowing £600 on Christmas presents regardless of the source of the income.

Pidapie · 23/12/2015 08:14

I would pay rent. No present is better than a roof over our head :)

AndNowItsSeven · 23/12/2015 12:49

No my point was that bacon said the op hadn't budgeted for food and was planning on using her HB for food. She wasn't , however if she pays her rent with her tax credits how will she eat?
HB is allocated to pay rent, yes it's appropriate to pay some rent out of tax credits but not at the expense of food etc.

goodnightdarthvader1 · 23/12/2015 13:42

Its reasonable for the LL to take the hit for the OP's mistake (which she's admitted to)?

Indeed.

seven201 · 23/12/2015 14:00

You need to pay the rent.

Blondeshavemorefun · 23/12/2015 23:42

at first i thought poor op,lost her job, yes she was silly not to get claim in at right time .... but then read her replies and she is ungrateful and tbh selfish towards her ll

always pay rent to keep a roof over your head

it is not the ll fault you cocked up and why should a ll have less money so means their own mortgage/bills/xmas may be short

yes you lost your job in oct but surely youve been saving for xmas, it comes every year, and brought pressies etc

£1300 for a 3b rented home is normal where i live (south east) and next door rent theirs out for that, which pays for the care for their mum in a home like another poster wrote at the beginning of thread, if their rent isnt paid, their mums care fees wont be paid

dont think you have stated the ages, tho people keep asking, but you can buy some cheap/nice stuff from 99p shops and charities - but cant beleive you havnt brought a thing over the year for xmas Hmm

and think expact said, its one day, and totally over rated if you cant afford it, its a roast dinner and yes the £10 coop deal is good

so yes contact ll and ask if you can pay £100 less this month as struggling, she may be nice, she may not be able to afford to say delay, but you dont need to spend £600 on xmas and pay half the rent